SoThatHappened Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 There's no point being an ass about it. Ugh, there's no point in you having a platform from which to speak. She is happy to meet up this week and grab a bite to eat. Not sure why, probably just that , catch up. I'm just going to play it cool , all the conversations we have had, have been just general cool stuff nothing about the past. Would you still meet up with her, I'm up for it but not going to get my hopes up. Just be happy and go with the flow. As hard as it is to deny this meeting, I think you shouldn't go. If there are still feelings, and I'm sure there are, meeting up may backfire. It's hard to say "no" to an ex when they want to catch up, but unless you're 100% indifferent, this will probably hurt you and set you back. If she wants to get back together and reconcile, she'll let you know that. Otherwise, a meeting to just chat and catch up about her life (which may have a new guy in it) will probably do more harm than good. Link to post Share on other sites
Tbisb74 Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 Ugh, there's no point in you having a platform from which to speak. Ah. I was all set to bite back at you when it occurred to me. Poor choice of word. 'Ass' in the UK, although in common usage by the young in the same manner and meaning with which it is used in the USA, was not my intention here. I'm of an older generation, where I am using the term in the same way one would refer to a mule, or donkey. Stubborn. Hard-headed. obstinate. The OP came in for advice regarding renewing contact with his ex, and has consistently raised points as to why he believes he could remain in touch. This in spite of several members pointing out this would not be a good idea. I am hoping he has finally come round to abandoning such a venture altogether... but I didn't mean 'ass' in the sense you read it. Which I can quite understand. Apologies to you and the OP. Link to post Share on other sites
SoThatHappened Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 Apologies to you and the OP. No sweat. Just learned something new about "a$$" in the UK. Link to post Share on other sites
scobro Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 Basically she felt she wasn't sure if she was in love with me anymore and after we had a break decided she wanted to end it. I am 32 and she is 30 and she felt wanted to start going out clubbing and seeing her friends more. 99.9% of the time there is another guy involved.Rarely, except for abusive relationships or drugs and excessive alcohol are involved does a woman just up and end things out of nowhere. the person who all of a sudden is not in love, or has different feelings is now with or considering someone else. Do you want to be casual with her as she tells you about someone else she is now with? Do yourself a favour and don't contact her it never goes well and you end up hurt if you want back with her and she starts talking about a new relationship. Or you know something is up but she isn't talking about it so she doesn't hurt you....Thats even worse because you have to play detective and its just a big mind fawck.You can't be casual when you want her back!! Link to post Share on other sites
scobro Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 Its crazy how you can spend 7 years with someone and do so many nice things like holidays , Xmas, birthdays to be completely cut out of their life to trying to strategise a way to speak and meet up with them.\ The better question is how does someone after 7 years just end things and want to go out clubbing.I hate to say this but it sounds like she has someone else in her life that she is now with.Come on, you guys take a break and she doesn't think she loves you and now she wants to go clubbing with her friends instead of being with you.....it has all the ingredients of infidelity and another man:( Link to post Share on other sites
Simon Phoenix Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 She is happy to meet up this week and grab a bite to eat. Not sure why, probably just that , catch up. I'm just going to play it cool , all the conversations we have had, have been just general cool stuff nothing about the past. Would you still meet up with her, I'm up for it but not going to get my hopes up. Just be happy and go with the flow. It would be moronic to go, but you are going to go anyway. You clearly have it in your head to do this and you are living in a fog of delusion, so best of luck. Link to post Share on other sites
Author newbie in love Posted July 29, 2014 Author Share Posted July 29, 2014 \ The better question is how does someone after 7 years just end things and want to go out clubbing.I hate to say this but it sounds like she has someone else in her life that she is now with.Come on, you guys take a break and she doesn't think she loves you and now she wants to go clubbing with her friends instead of being with you.....it has all the ingredients of infidelity and another man:( I wish I knew whether there was another guy before I decide to meet up with her. Surely its possible for us together again it does happen with other couples. She may remember how fun I am to be around etc...if she a fella why would she agree to meet !e up with if she was with someone. Link to post Share on other sites
scobro Posted July 31, 2014 Share Posted July 31, 2014 I wish I knew whether there was another guy before I decide to meet up with her. Surely its possible for us together again it does happen with other couples. She may remember how fun I am to be around etc...if she a fella why would she agree to meet !e up with if she was with someone. She is over it and is indifferent to the situation because there is someone else so there is no real feelings meeting up.You were a bifg part of her life and maybe doesn't want to completely cut ties.My ex has someone and wanted to meet up with me.Its crazy, I know, but some women think very differently.It is only going to cause you pain.... trust me no good can come out of it from your perspective especially if you want to reconcile it will be that much worse.Imagine she starts talking that she is in a new relationship or dating someone new.How are you going to feel????Pretty messed up I am sure.Dont do it not worth the pain you are going to feel. Link to post Share on other sites
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