Author Winterina Posted July 26, 2014 Author Share Posted July 26, 2014 She is judged for the thigns she had done even without me. It is not a just a mistake kicking your kid out of family home for the sake of a man who was beating her and pushed her down the stairs. Great mom. She is still selfish. And I do not want my bf to do more than set boundaries. Thats all. Love and care has to exist on both ends as they are parent and child but respect has to exist also from both ends. And if you think it is just a few weekeneds a year you are dead wrong. We were gone off to see her for 20 days. It is likely that some 10 days a year will be spend together again. That is a month dealing with dynamics like that. And that is of course not all. Moms and kids call each other often, talk often... they are always in our lives. And that is how it should be. But with respect for your kids, their needs, their partners and their place in their kids lives. One day as a mom you have to understand that you are no longer the most important woman in your little boy's life and let go and let your relationship take its natural turn where your son is adult with his own priorities. You have to stop treating him a kid. Honestly, even if this means I am horrible, I would not live with a guy who sees his mom's needs and his mom as a number one woman in his life. The only people I would love him to put ahead of me and my needs is our possible future kids. Not his mom. Imagine having kids with a guy whose mom rules his life? How would his kids perceive their dad who is being treated by his mom in accordance with her impulses? Etc... I am thinking ahead, I know, but I have to consider these things as we had a plan to live together and maybe one day have family. Here is the funny part: if his mom treated me and my bf and our relationship with respect, I would definitely want to spend time with her, would mean the world of her and become her best friend probably... I wanted to have that or anything close to that, or at least respectable relationship. I would myself do anything for her.... I meant, pushed her kid down the stairs... Link to post Share on other sites
Omei Posted July 27, 2014 Share Posted July 27, 2014 He does have an issue. The love of his life is thinking to leave him, the love of her life, because of it. Their relationship was never fine, he just did not realise it - she chose to stay in a relationship with a man who abused her children physically. She kicked her sister out of the house at the age of 16 because that man asked her to. She chose him over her children. She is now 65 and feels bad for the things she did to them, but still, selfishness is still there as a character trait, and she still thinks of her needs before she thinks of what is it that her son needs. These are not your problems to solve And really you're acting as his mother now yourself he needs a girlfriend not a person whos obsessively analyzing their family. Just don't he around his mother then. You will lose Link to post Share on other sites
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