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Have you ever been over an ex but still hated them with a passion?

nousername21

By nousername21
in General Relationship Discussion

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nousername21 Member

nousername21

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That being said, if she is playing with his parental rights, he has a valid reason for strong emotions.

 

I am actually more curious about why you are so concerned with what the average person would consider normal reactions. Your post isn't about how she is interfering or how he is angry all the time or really anything I would, personally, consider normal. You are concerned he still wants to be with his ExW because he hates her. What besides being angry makes your radar go off that he may be looking to replace you?

 

Honestly I have really bad anxiety and I was anxious about other things but when I get in a bad state of mind I over think everything. I also have had many guy friends and I've never had one who wasn't still in love with the ex they "hated" so much so I guess I just over thought it. It normally doesn't bother me.

amaysngrace Established Member

amaysngrace

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I don't hate my exH but I surely don't like him because he's not a nice person.

 

I realize that he's damaged so that gives him a little bit of a pass but he's not a great dad and he acts like a jerk a lot but it's not his fault that he's lacking so I don't hate him for being him.

 

I don't hate anyone really. That's bad mojo.

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Toddbt12y1 Established Member

Toddbt12y1

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Not worth it to hate them. All it does is continue a cycle, in which emotions are held prisoner to the memory of a bad person.

 

Disliking them is a better option. Rather, disliking the very terrible things they have done, if at all. Avoiding them is like wisdom.

 

To answer your question: I am over her. Rather, I choose and control myself to be over her. To hate her, would only lead me down a bad path of insanity. In...a way...it is emotional investment, imprisonment to a person no longer there.

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beatcuff Established Member

beatcuff

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... do you think the situation changes when there's kids...

 

no.

 

.... he claims his hate has nothing to do with the relationship they had but the fact that she uses his kid as a bargaining chip.

 

then he would be angry at WHAT she is doing not at her... Why? although nearly every person in the world says not to involve the children in a split situation, they are and some parents use it to their 'advantage' (and to the determent of the children).

 

many on this board will retell tales of a nasty split (theirs or close friends), claims on assets for spite, playing with visitation, etc. then over time (years) most settle down and move forward.

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Charlie Harper Established Member

Charlie Harper

Posted
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It is said that the opposite of love is not hate but indifference.

Don't consider myself over someone until I'm at the stage of indifference.

 

That is what makes my Ex hate me, I am over her, my indifference really gets her, I can't help it... I just she her and I feel like she was a friend long time ago...

 

My brother on the other hand has an Ex that for 8 years has given him Hell.... some people jus can't let go.... EGO is a bummer.

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