Eagle755 Posted June 27, 2014 Posted June 27, 2014 I dated a girl for about a year and a half, I'm 22, she's 18. She seemed very grown up for her age, or else it never would have happened. I'm going to list both sides of the story, so that it's not biased, but don't think that I'm being negative towards myself because I know there's no reason to think things are your fault. For about 8 months we had a very good relationship, like beyond amazing, better than any of my past ones. Soon as she turned 18 she moved out of her ****ty parents who basically had her grounded for 18 years and she suddenly stopped taking her bipolar depressant medicine. And then everything took a huge turn, I had no idea what I had gotten myself into and no idea how to handle it. But I stayed with her, knowing I loved her endlessly. But she instantly started to act out, and say and do things she never would have before. Almost a whole different person. She started to lie and cried an extremely high amount. But I still stuck with it, and we got an apartment together a few weeks later. The moods were unbearable, mixed with working 50 hours I couldn't handle it. I started to just stop being around her what so ever. I couldn't do it. I tried just simply hugging her, doing sweet things, nothing worked. She started to get mentally and physically abusive. Once again, whole different person. But I loved her. Few months went by like this. I didn't give her much attention the whole time, except sex. We fought everyday, and it was very bad. So few months of not paying attention to her, she tried to fill the hole I left by getting a dog. That didn't work so she went and started riding horses because she loves doing that. Then one day while riding we had a big argument on the phone and she broke up with me because I was finally like, I can't handle this anymore, the moods are starting to make me crazy. I was upset but I really didn't think much of it, she was a loyal girl to me, and we still knew we loved each other, we just kept fighting too much. But a month later I catch her at another guy's house. Turns out she met him while riding horses. She saw him quite a few times during that month of being broke up but kept it completely hidden from me. I interrogated her until she finally told me she slept with him twice after about 3 weeks of hanging out with him. This guy is disgusting and dated my ex, who while dating him, complained about the lousy ass boring sex they had. And hes very ugly. Whilest I'm not. So from my thinking it wasn't about sex at all. After she told me that though. I cried, a lot, and was furious. She at first didn't understand why. Then started to cry uncontrollably, and kept begging me to stay, and kept telling me she loved me. But I left, packed all of my things, and left. Told her I'm sorry, but this was the choice you made. Few days went by, she kept trying to talk to me but I ignored her. But finally I went over to see her. Because I missed her and I still love her. we talked about working things out. And she wanted to very badly to work things out. I asked if she had talked to the guy, and she insisted every time, that no she hasn't at all. But a week later, I found out she had talked to him on 3 separate occasions. One occasion she tried to go see him, but ended up not going to his house, she says, she realized she didn't want his attention, she wanted mine. She would not tell me what else she talked about with him, but she ended up blocking him and telling him to f off. I was a mess. So very upset. I ended up having sex with other girls to ease myself. She knows I did as well, made her very upset and jealous. Now my problem is, she stopped wanting to see me about a week ago, and talk to me, because she says "it hurts to much to see me because of how badly of a mistake she made". So now she can't even talk to me, or see me. She cried a couple times just from looking at me last week. But I kept trying, I went over there randomly and tried being sweet, but all she would do is hit me with very bad angry mood swings, and get mad for me coming to see her. I just don't know what to think of it. She is moving out of state in a week because she says she wants to "fix herself, and also get on meds again" and wants to do so away from everything for about a year, then come back and start over fresh with me. She sits at home with no tv, literally all day, literally doing nothing what so ever. She doesn't even eat or sleep anymore. She started smoking again, and drinking to ease her depression. I just don't know what to do. I love her so very much still. Although what happened hurts so very badly. I don't even know what she is really thinking, or if she had feelings for him, or what. Also, when I ask her, her only reason for sleeping with him is "I really don't know, I keep trying to think of why, but I cant" she hasn't once blamed it on me. But she has said she thought she wanted his attention, because whilest I gave none, he gave a ton to her.
Mcnulty Posted June 27, 2014 Posted June 27, 2014 She sounds like a train wreck mate. Do you really want to put yourself through it all? being mentally and physically abused by someone who sounds like she just hasn't grown up? She couldn't give you a reason for why she slept with him!! Soiled goods and a toxic relationship...you turn, tell yourself you dodged a bullet and move on, you're young and obviously can attract others...move on.
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