Corduroy Posted June 21, 2014 Posted June 21, 2014 I met this amazing girl today, super chill. We have a lot in common & I'm thinking about making a move, but I don't want to seem to desperate Anyways, do girls like when guys give a lot of attention, or is it a big turnoff?
Yamaha Posted June 21, 2014 Posted June 21, 2014 Depends how much interest they have. If a girl likes you lots then it is hard to screw it up. Remember, the person with the least interest has the most power. If she's all over you then your golden. Otherwise, showing to much interest will scare them away. Having lots in common is good but attraction ( usually ) drives the interest first. Do some flirting and gage her reaction. If she flirts back then full speed ahead. 1
Author Corduroy Posted June 21, 2014 Author Posted June 21, 2014 Depends how much interest they have. If a girl likes you lots then it is hard to screw it up. Remember, the person with the least interest has the most power. If she's all over you then your golden. Otherwise, showing to much interest will scare them away. Having lots in common is good but attraction ( usually ) drives the interest first. Do some flirting and gage her reaction. If she flirts back then full speed ahead. Thats some good advice. Well, she's seems to like my photography, but I don't know if she's interested in me, she asked for my Instagram, and started following me, so I guess thats a good sign. From the look of her feed she just went through a breakup, like me. She has a lot of cute pics, so I guess I'll do some flirting once in a while to break the ice...
allez102 Posted June 21, 2014 Posted June 21, 2014 I met this amazing girl today, super chill. We have a lot in common & I'm thinking about making a move, but I don't want to seem to desperate Anyways, do girls like when guys give a lot of attention, or is it a big turnoff? For me personally too much attention turns me off, but so does playing hard to get. There is a happy medium and I would advise trying to stick to it! Girls can normally tell when guys are playing hard to get and most girls don't appreciate it. 3
spiderowl Posted June 21, 2014 Posted June 21, 2014 A nice balance of interaction is good, with him maybe showing a bit more interest (because he is the guy after all). That would seem about right. Too much interest and I worry he'll become too serious too fast or clingy. Too little interest and I wonder if it's worth investing my time (and heart) in someone who appears to be too busy or distracted elsewhere most of the time. 1
Assasda Posted June 22, 2014 Posted June 22, 2014 lol @ a lot of attention. Ask yourself the same question. Do you like a lot of attention?
deathandtaxes Posted June 22, 2014 Posted June 22, 2014 Ask yourself the same question? You're talking about games. Games are bs. It either clicks, or it doesn't. And when it doesn't, if saves you a lot of time.
PogoStick Posted June 22, 2014 Posted June 22, 2014 Many guys are afraid to show interest, end up acting like a friend, and the girl never knows he was into her. Ask her out and be clear you're interested. Then back off and let her respond. 2
emeryentropy Posted June 22, 2014 Posted June 22, 2014 I met this amazing girl today, super chill. We have a lot in common & I'm thinking about making a move, but I don't want to seem to desperate Anyways, do girls like when guys give a lot of attention, or is it a big turnoff? If a man played hard to get with me I would move on personally because I feel like that's girly of him, and that he should be chasing me. The more attention he gives me the more I will feel like he really wants me and slowly make myself available to him. That's always been my opinion on it. 1
mattny Posted June 22, 2014 Posted June 22, 2014 If a man played hard to get with me I would move on personally because I feel like that's girly of him, and that he should be chasing me. The more attention he gives me the more I will feel like he really wants me and slowly make myself available to him. That's always been my opinion on it. I disagree with this. I dont do the chasing. Too many women Ive met play this game of 'becoming slowly available' and then spring the 'lets be friends' line after a month or two of dates, flirting, going out places etc. Dont lead us on if you have no intention of going places with it. Ive gotten really good at judging responses about 'going out to dinner'. If a date doesnt work and she replies back with another time in mind, then great. But if she deadheads it with 'no im busy that night' and offers no recourse, then I move on. Same with conversations where its 'lol' or 'haha'...one liner or one word responses. They arent putting the effort into the conversation, why should I be doing all the work? In the end, why play the games? If you like each other go for it. My ex and I never played games. We always talked all the time in the beginning, but there are times where you wont WANT to talk. Just laying out on the couch or enjoying a nice drive somewhere without a conversation doesnt mean youre 'losing attraction' for each other. 1
emeryentropy Posted June 22, 2014 Posted June 22, 2014 Yeah you completely misinterpreted what I wrote, but that's okay. I'm not the woman you described. If you know what you like then I don't know why you're asking us our opinions anyway.
d0nnivain Posted June 23, 2014 Posted June 23, 2014 Do not play at anything in a relationship. Be genuine. If you like her, express interest but don't smother her. Attention is good. Too much attention is bad. Strike a balance.
hasaquestion Posted June 23, 2014 Posted June 23, 2014 Don't "play" hard to get. BE hard to get. Fill your time with things that are important to you. If you aren't available to see her at 9 o'clock, that's her loss, and you can meet up another time. When you put the ball in her court, you back off. When you send her a message, you wait. No girl wants a guy who looks at her like a missing piece of the puzzle or something like that. Life is your first love. The girl is the side piece.
No Limit Posted June 23, 2014 Posted June 23, 2014 You shouldn't be playing anything. No one should play games. Whether you want a relationship or not, be honest and let her know. She might agree with you, maybe not, but there's always the option to move on if it doesn't work out.
Dallers Posted June 23, 2014 Posted June 23, 2014 That first message was exactly right it is on a situation basis. You have to analyse the situation and take a hunch. The best thing to do is be 50/50 not too needy and not playing games too early on and test the waters. I lost a girl a while ago who was smashing because I got the signals wrong and hard to get led to no get at all. It is like running away from lava which is closing in on you, keep running for the love of god but do not run too fast because if you lose your footing it is game over. At the same time run too slow and pain and misery will follow shortly afterwards. There is a correct path you can take but the odds are not on your side and it is very narrow.
Author Corduroy Posted June 23, 2014 Author Posted June 23, 2014 Do not play at anything in a relationship. Be genuine. If you like her, express interest but don't smother her. Attention is good. Too much attention is bad. Strike a balance. So I should saying something like "cute pic" or make a joke to her like "you look like my next gf." lol, is that too much?
ain5053 Posted June 23, 2014 Posted June 23, 2014 So I should saying something like "cute pic" or make a joke to her like "you look like my next gf." lol, is that too much? NO! That sounds like something a 13 year old would say. 1st off - do not flirt through Instagram! 2 - Do not use a corny pick up line. Do it in a person, or at least via text. For example more appropriate would be to text her saying "You are beautiful" but even better would be to just ask her out on a date.
Author Corduroy Posted June 23, 2014 Author Posted June 23, 2014 (edited) NO! That sounds like something a 13 year old would say. 1st off - do not flirt through Instagram! 2 - Do not use a corny pick up line. Do it in a person, or at least via text. For example more appropriate would be to text her saying "You are beautiful" but even better would be to just ask her out on a date. LOL okay. It does seem corny. But years ago I knew an acquaintance, then I found her on Instagram. We flirted back & forth for a month, then she wanted to meet up. 2 dates later we made it official, and ended up engaged months later. But that ran its course. I only met this girl once, and the only communication I have is Instagram -___- Wish I had her number! Edited June 23, 2014 by Corduroy
Author Corduroy Posted June 24, 2014 Author Posted June 24, 2014 That first message was exactly right it is on a situation basis. You have to analyse the situation and take a hunch. The best thing to do is be 50/50 not too needy and not playing games too early on and test the waters. I lost a girl a while ago who was smashing because I got the signals wrong and hard to get led to no get at all. It is like running away from lava which is closing in on you, keep running for the love of god but do not run too fast because if you lose your footing it is game over. At the same time run too slow and pain and misery will follow shortly afterwards. There is a correct path you can take but the odds are not on your side and it is very narrow. I'll do 50/50 then. I'll hold back from being clingy. I made mistakes in the past and gave up sooooo many opportunities! I think this girl is really into me, I'm mos def gonna make a move in the future.
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