AnneT1985 Posted June 21, 2014 Posted June 21, 2014 Hi y'all! How are you doing? I have a question please and thank you regarding Facebook. I have an inlaw who "keeps tabs" on me and I dislike it. For example, she adds my friends whom she doesn't speak to (which I can't control), but will then mention things like "oh so you were at Diane's wedding shower on the weekend I see" and one time she got upset with me because I couldn't take time off work to attend a function of hers, but she saw on Facebook that the weekend following that I took a trip and actually confronted me saying "oh I see you can't take time off work to celebrate my party...but you can for a trip". I really don't like this but don't want to cause further drama as she is related to my husband. Would y'all block her and let your friends know what she is doing? What do y'all think about what she is doing and what I can do about it? I've never experienced that before! Thanks so much y'all! xx
d0nnivain Posted June 21, 2014 Posted June 21, 2014 It's FB. She's passive aggressive. Just ignore her. 2
juicygirl Posted June 21, 2014 Posted June 21, 2014 I would just delete her. If you don't want to do that you can just limit what she can and can not see in Facebook using settings and privacy. You can even hide your friends list, so she can't go around adding people. If they're your friends and they haven't even met her, I would just ask them to kindly remove her as she's being a drama queen. You're married to your husband not his family. I'm sure your nice enough to her ,but that doesn't give her the right to cyber stalk you. 2
jbelle6 Posted June 21, 2014 Posted June 21, 2014 Don't block or delete her that will just cause more drama. Adjust your privacy settings so she is restricted in what she can view on your page. 3
Raena Posted June 21, 2014 Posted June 21, 2014 I agree with the others.... put her on restricted status. That means she can only see what you post publicly. She won't know you did it, she'll just think you stopped using fb because she won't see you posting anything anymore. Then restrict who can see your friends so that she can't see any of your friends unless they are mutual friends. Go ahead and ask the friends that she did befriend to unfriend her if you feel comfortable doing that. Make sure everything you post is only to your friends. You could even go so far as to make a group of your "close friends" (you have to do this by adding each person to that list) and then only post information to your "close friends". Doing all of this means that you won't have to confront her face to face about her intrusiveness and cause problems with your husbands family. If you delete her, she'll get upset over that and it will cause problems. I've had to do the same exact thing with coworkers and other people that I don't want knowing every little thing about what goes on in my life. 2
MuddyFootprints Posted June 21, 2014 Posted June 21, 2014 I like the restricted status idea, too. I wish I had thought of it before I went and blocked them all. Afterwards, I reconsidered and decided it wasn't the most brilliant way to handle the situation and unblocked, but now it looks like I just unfriended them. I didn't realise that I would have to refriend after unblocking. Oops. So much for not being a drama queen. 2
tnimbus Posted June 21, 2014 Posted June 21, 2014 Isn't Facebook wonderful...just kidding. I commiserate with you OP, I have a family member who will post very private info,(very), on my public page, even though I have nicely asked her not to. The restricting info someone mentioned helps though. I'm going to the "close friends" option, as it is the last one I have besides deleting my account....which I still may do. Best of luck to you on your in-law. 1
pink_sugar Posted June 21, 2014 Posted June 21, 2014 My MIL and stepfather in law were like this on FB. They even went as far to comment that we swear too much or complain about things we'd say. They even stopped speaking to us over something stupid. The option to hide certain people from your posts is your friend. 1
Author AnneT1985 Posted June 22, 2014 Author Posted June 22, 2014 Great ideas thanks so much y'all! xx
whichwayisup Posted June 23, 2014 Posted June 23, 2014 Hi y'all! How are you doing? I have a question please and thank you regarding Facebook. I have an inlaw who "keeps tabs" on me and I dislike it. For example, she adds my friends whom she doesn't speak to (which I can't control), but will then mention things like "oh so you were at Diane's wedding shower on the weekend I see" and one time she got upset with me because I couldn't take time off work to attend a function of hers, but she saw on Facebook that the weekend following that I took a trip and actually confronted me saying "oh I see you can't take time off work to celebrate my party...but you can for a trip". I really don't like this but don't want to cause further drama as she is related to my husband. Would y'all block her and let your friends know what she is doing? What do y'all think about what she is doing and what I can do about it? I've never experienced that before! Thanks so much y'all! xx Change your settings so only you can see your friends list. Make your wall private, so she can only see what you post if it's public. i think it's a custom setting and you can specifically put who you want to see your posts and who you want to block out. Don't react to anything she has said on fb. If anything, call her and talk to her about this (let your H know you're gonna do this) and just be honest but kind about it. hopefully she'll back off. 1
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