lovesfool Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 I've heard this advice a few times. People say that you should try to focus on the negatives of the relationship to get over someone. You should soon realise that they weren't right for you and you no longer want your ex. I have tried this, but it doesn't seem to be working. I've even made a list of the bad things about my ex. He's lazy. He's very bad at replying to messages. He's childish. He's overly confident. He's never on time. Some of his friends are horrible people. He litters. He's a freeloader. I also made a list of bad things about the relationship. We had different interests. We had different personalities. It was going to turn into a long distance realtionship which would have been very difficult. And not to forget, he no longer wants to be with me. Even after all this, I just end up telling myself that I'd gladly ignore all that if he took me back. Am I crazy? If someone told me they were going out with a guy like this, I would tell them to dump them straight away. Am I doing this wrong?
me85 Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 Awe...you're just like myself and a lot of other people. Unfortunately, it just has to run it's course. Nothing lasts forever and this too shall pass. Just try to avoid harping on it all together. I find that keeping busy is the best medicine there is for anything troubling me. Well, that and alcohol.
Hoosfoos Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 I'm right with you on this. I could make similar lists up about my ex and why it wouldn't be good for us to be together, yet I still miss her so much it kills me. I'm hoping that eventually my head will catch up to my heart, but it seems impossible - there were so many moments and things about the relationship that kept me coming back, as I am sure there were for you also. I'm not sure if what I've have written can help you at all, but take comfort that you're not alone with your feelings.
OwMyEyeball Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 I've got a whole page of negative traits that I keep adding to. On the flip side is a half page of relationship issues. Yet I still love(d) her. That's what makes those types of connections so special. Despite our flaws we can be accepted by another for who we are and feel free to be ourselves. I think my main issue was that I still had some renovations left to do and got into a relationship too quickly Keep that list around and read it each day. It will help you in the healing process.
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