Bishop556 Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 I had a very vivid dream tonight. The dream was of my ex sitting down with me and letting me tell her how much she hurt me and apologizing for doing so. Now this obviously is the subconscious telling me that I have unresolved issues about our break up six months ago, and I should be completely over it as I thought I was, but it still hurts none the less. I checked her tumblr last night out of weakness, first time in months, and the fact that she was talking about how she was deeply in love with the guy she started dating two weeks after leaving me and them making sexual jokes between each other. I should not have done so as it disrupted my healing. Why am I still hurt and not past this?
triniechu Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 Healing really takes a bit of time. You have to be patient. It's only been 2 1/2 weeks since my BF broke it off with me. I feel as though I am moving on BUT I also feel that if I see anything on a social network with him and new girl, yeah I'd probably be upset. I actually deactivated my FB, stopped using IG as well, just to save me from the pain. Just remember healing takes time. Could be weeks, months and even years. 1
mattny Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 Healing really takes a bit of time. You have to be patient. It's only been 2 1/2 weeks since my BF broke it off with me. I feel as though I am moving on BUT I also feel that if I see anything on a social network with him and new girl, yeah I'd probably be upset. I actually deactivated my FB, stopped using IG as well, just to save me from the pain. Just remember healing takes time. Could be weeks, months and even years. This. Give it time. It took me almost 8 months to really not think about her anymore. It took her all of 2 months to drop 5 years into the drain. Spent more time in Crossfit and totally immersed myself in my new career and just did my best to push her out. I blocked her on fb for a good while, and she noticed I did and confronted me about it..I said nothing and continued about my business. She made some feeable attempts in the beginning to stay friendly in the gym but I never paid her so much as a hi or bye. Im in a much better place than I was with her, look better feel better and my attitude has changed drastically. There will be someone else out there 2
triniechu Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 Yeah as much as I still love and care for him, I need to push him out as well. I actually unfriended him and blocked him first. Then I realized I was still friends with all friends and family and I'm sure his friends will post photos of his new girl or whatever. So I just deactivated the whole thing. That would be easiest so I don't see anything. I do want to stay friends. But I feel it may take a really long time until we will get there.
mattny Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 I had a very vivid dream tonight. The dream was of my ex sitting down with me and letting me tell her how much she hurt me and apologizing for doing so. Now this obviously is the subconscious telling me that I have unresolved issues about our break up six months ago, and I should be completely over it as I thought I was, but it still hurts none the less. I checked her tumblr last night out of weakness, first time in months, and the fact that she was talking about how she was deeply in love with the guy she started dating two weeks after leaving me and them making sexual jokes between each other. I should not have done so as it disrupted my healing. Why am I still hurt and not past this? She left you? Let her come crawling back. Go be a better you and youll realize how great this world is.
mattny Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 Yeah as much as I still love and care for him, I need to push him out as well. I actually unfriended him and blocked him first. Then I realized I was still friends with all friends and family and I'm sure his friends will post photos of his new girl or whatever. So I just deactivated the whole thing. That would be easiest so I don't see anything. I do want to stay friends. But I feel it may take a really long time until we will get there. Dont wanna hijack this dudes thread..ill respond back in yours lol
Simon Phoenix Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 Heck, I have occasional random dreams about exes from over a decade ago. Dreaming of them is completely normal, even if you are recovered. It's going to happen again -- just don't use it as an excuse to break NC.
Author Bishop556 Posted June 19, 2014 Author Posted June 19, 2014 Heck, I have occasional random dreams about exes from over a decade ago. Dreaming of them is completely normal, even if you are recovered. It's going to happen again -- just don't use it as an excuse to break NC. I am not going to. It just put a hamper on my day, made me feel pretty down. I knew that it was just the fact that I reopened old wounds due to breaking NC. There is no place for me in the past anymore, I know that. She is not pinning over me, and I am the only one suffering anymore. Once of my character faults is that I have the tendency to fight to hold on to the past instead of moving on. I need to focus on my passions and my future as I know finally after all these months that I am deserving of happiness just as my ex is.
Mistercash Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 Let me tell you about this dream I had about my current ex. It happened last week I think. We were in some store buying a phone card for a prepaid. I asked her if she still liked me. She said not really. After hearing that, nervousness went through my dream body. Then, I woke up like WTF?
Simon Phoenix Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 I am not going to. It just put a hamper on my day, made me feel pretty down. I knew that it was just the fact that I reopened old wounds due to breaking NC. There is no place for me in the past anymore, I know that. She is not pinning over me, and I am the only one suffering anymore. Once of my character faults is that I have the tendency to fight to hold on to the past instead of moving on. I need to focus on my passions and my future as I know finally after all these months that I am deserving of happiness just as my ex is. I understand. It sucks. I know that dreams of my ex unnerved me when I was still in the recovery stage. But it's completely normal and nothing to feel bad about. Hell, I had three nights in a row last week where I dreamt about my ex that brought me here (nearly two years after the fact and several months removed from any other dream about her) and I was like WTF? But dreams are like that sometimes. Hell, I have dreams where my high school friends are hanging out with my college ex-girlfriend, who is talking to one of my more recent friends. Dreams are weird. Chalk it up to that and keep trudging forward.
leavesonautumn Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 The worst part about dreaming of an ex is that you spend your waking moments (hopefully not every moment, but you know) forcing them out, trying to think about anything else or reminding yourself how you're better off etc etc and these dreams basically force us to think about them. We don't ask for it, it just happens. It's important to wake up and just forget it. Most people forget their dreams so quickly so we just have to let these dreams slip by too. When I dream about my ex, it's usually about us getting back together. Nothing to feel bad about.
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