natwilliams Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 Is it just me or do many women these days have a major insecurity about dating a guy who might have any "hipster" qualities. I don't have any tattoos or facial hair, or trendy haircuts or anything. I wear normal preppy clothes and run my own successful real estate business. But I happen to also cycle and compost and eat healthy. And collect vinyl techno records haha. It seems like when talking to women, the hipster thing comes up a lot, and I can tell they are trying to judge me and/or avoid it like the plague. Usually it seems more than anything that they're insecure about themselves and what people would think if seen with a guy who is even mildly "hipster" because it has become a tease in our society (and suggests less masculinity perhaps). Should I leave behind all these women with their fear-based and judgmental mindset? Or should I actually worry about this whole nonsense and try to project a more masculine character (even though I really do believe biking, composting, eating organic food is the right thing to do, I'm not just trying to be cool).
hopefullove Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 Is it just me or do many women these days have a major insecurity about dating a guy who might have any "hipster" qualities. I don't have any tattoos or facial hair, or trendy haircuts or anything. I wear normal preppy clothes and run my own successful real estate business. But I happen to also cycle and compost and eat healthy. And collect vinyl techno records haha. It seems like when talking to women, the hipster thing comes up a lot, and I can tell they are trying to judge me and/or avoid it like the plague. Usually it seems more than anything that they're insecure about themselves and what people would think if seen with a guy who is even mildly "hipster" because it has become a tease in our society (and suggests less masculinity perhaps). Should I leave behind all these women with their fear-based and judgmental mindset? Or should I actually worry about this whole nonsense and try to project a more masculine character (even though I really do believe biking, composting, eating organic food is the right thing to do, I'm not just trying to be cool). oh ok i decided to read your post now. Okay - i dated a hipster like 12 years ago. Vintage grandpa clothes, tattoos, vinyl, pin ball machine obsession, going to see bands i've never heard of before, he was way too cool for me. I don't know what you're talking about, you don't sound like a hipster, and you're saying you don't look like a hipster. What are you talking about. I don't understand any part of you that sounds hipster like. Where do you live, you just sound like a normal person to me. I am from the west coast.
Under The Radar Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 What if I have one tattoo and a single speed bike ...... am I ahead of the power curve? 1
Author natwilliams Posted June 19, 2014 Author Posted June 19, 2014 I live in western New York state in a mid sized city - in the closest thing to a "hipstery" neighborhood if you will. I just don't know what to make of the women who bring it up (not about me necessarily) but as if they're genuinely worried about it or something. They're worried about embarrassment perhaps because "hipster" has almost become like a red scare haha. Any hipster quality = avoid.
Elle1975 Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 Is it just me or do many women these days have a major insecurity about dating a guy who might have any "hipster" qualities. I don't have any tattoos or facial hair, or trendy haircuts or anything. I wear normal preppy clothes and run my own successful real estate business. But I happen to also cycle and compost and eat healthy. And collect vinyl techno records haha. It seems like when talking to women, the hipster thing comes up a lot, and I can tell they are trying to judge me and/or avoid it like the plague. Usually it seems more than anything that they're insecure about themselves and what people would think if seen with a guy who is even mildly "hipster" because it has become a tease in our society (and suggests less masculinity perhaps). Should I leave behind all these women with their fear-based and judgmental mindset? Or should I actually worry about this whole nonsense and try to project a more masculine character (even though I really do believe biking, composting, eating organic food is the right thing to do, I'm not just trying to be cool). In all honesty I have no clue why it's such a big deal. A lot of people nowadays compost and eat healthy. For instance, they sell organic lawn fertilizers now, pet friendly lawn products, etc.. Not sure who you hang out with, but they need to open their eyes. Good for you on living healthy! 2
hopefullove Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 i dont get it. I live on the east coast now. so i know of the west coast hipsters and the east coast sect. How are you a hipster. I dont see anything that screams hipster. Eating healthy is pretty normal now, everyone I know tries to do that. Do you even consider yourself hipster? If you don't think you're a hipster, then these ladies are getting it from somewhere else. Is it your thick rimmed glasses without a lense, low V tees? full man beard? waxy moustache? do you roll your pants up to your ankles? I dont get it. Why are you a hipster. 3
hopefullove Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 oh you said this is just a general question? Personally I don't date hipsters because I dont have anything in common with that culture. I tried, it didn't work. Just like how I will not date a vegan, I don't have anything in common with that culture, I tried, and it didn't work. But I would rather date a hipster than a vegan. Are you a vegan hipster? Because then I would definitely not date you. 1
todreaminblue Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 (edited) I would much rather date a cycling hipster than a motor bikie...for i would want to walk more than ride...i dont like eating insects...and i once swallowed a fly as child ....talking while walking...chances of swallowing a whole heap of flies would occur on a bike.......although ants are quite zesty fles are not my ideal diet...and after having ridden double style on a harley i would say the guy has fingernails embedded in his spine to this day...even though he grinned and bore it like man should..I am left feeling rather guilty when i remember it because thy were truly strong talons of fingernails and all natural bar coats and coats of hardener....bald eagles would have been proud of........and composting well, worms are cool when you dont have to eat them..rock on hipster.......deb Edited June 19, 2014 by todreaminblue 5
littleplanet Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 I think some folks are just too hyped on labels, you know? I'm not quite sure what hipster is supposed to mean, anymore. I think the term got pre-empted, privatized and corporatized back when Christ was a child. Sometime a few eons and a coupla eras after that - we all got fussed up over cool. Now cool......was not known to scare the ladies much, back in those ancient times. And cool is definitely woman-friendly at the present sublime time(though it does depend somewhat on which credentials are trading on the market.) But being "hip" was just a bit of jive borrowed from broken, tokin' smokin' and chokin' jazz juked jokers who could blow horn, you know? It was definitely not plaid, Chad. It was bad, not mad, lad. And any cool fool schooled in the rules of romance was indeed, a smartypants for fancy dance and any sweet chance to lay out a stiff riff along that flirty-eyelashed glance, dig? So if some uptight chix mix slick flicks and happens to be their picks don't match the scratch of sweet treats with beebop beats and question marks light up their eyes instead of just your own self, Ralph.............. I'd say call it a day and choose to refuse the logo and the label. I went up on the mountain, gave my horn a blow thought I heard some pretty gal yell, 'yonder come my beau'...... c. Ry Cooder 1971 3
Glinda.Good Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 Composting makes you a hipster? Well, I'll be darned. 3
todreaminblue Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 I think some folks are just too hyped on labels, you know? I'm not quite sure what hipster is supposed to mean, anymore. I think the term got pre-empted, privatized and corporatized back when Christ was a child. Sometime a few eons and a coupla eras after that - we all got fussed up over cool. Now cool......was not known to scare the ladies much, back in those ancient times. And cool is definitely woman-friendly at the present sublime time(though it does depend somewhat on which credentials are trading on the market.) But being "hip" was just a bit of jive borrowed from broken, tokin' smokin' and chokin' jazz juked jokers who could blow horn, you know? It was definitely not plaid, Chad. It was bad, not mad, lad. And any cool fool schooled in the rules of romance was indeed, a smartypants for fancy dance and any sweet chance to lay out a stiff riff along that flirty-eyelashed glance, dig? So if some uptight chix mix slick flicks and happens to be their picks don't match the scratch of sweet treats with beebop beats and question marks light up their eyes instead of just your own self, Ralph.............. I'd say call it a day and choose to refuse the logo and the label. I went up on the mountain, gave my horn a blow thought I heard some pretty gal yell, 'yonder come my beau'...... c. Ry Cooder 1971 But being "hip" was just a bit of jive borrowed from broken, tokin' smokin' and chokin' jazz juked jokers who could blow horn, you know? It was definitely not plaid, Chad. It was bad, not mad, lad. my new catch phrase my worded friend ....lol....coolness in rhyme....like dr suess cool.... it was never hip was it?...it was always hep man....always hep not hip said with a throaty drawl cigarette between blase fingers...........cant say that these days as people start handing out injections for the three of them and donning facial masks.....like bird flu season....when they hear the words hep man....just hep.....and so now they say its so hip to be cool....and hip well....doesnt have the same coolness or ice as hep..............deb 1
littleplanet Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 my new catch phrase my worded friend ....lol....coolness in rhyme....like dr suess cool.... it was never hip was it?...it was always hep man....always hep not hip said with a throaty drawl cigarette between blase fingers...........cant say that these days as people start handing out injections for the three of them and donning facial masks.....like bird flu season....when they hear the words hep man....just hep.....and so now they say its so hip to be cool....and hip well....doesnt have the same coolness or ice as hep..............deb Ah yuss. Hepcats was full of cool drool. The cats had the fat stats that proved the groove that made us move. And when now we be tasked with masks for fast tracks jackin' knick knacks and paddy whacks the joint's gone slack and that's a fact. But still, Seuss was loose as a bird flu goose and now the noose around the neck of lost respect detects the wreck of civilized pride that slides a wide ride straight into some narrow little straightjacket racket. The jig has all gone wrong. I always did kinda like Hips. Botticelli got it right. 2
todreaminblue Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 Ah yuss. Hepcats was full of cool drool. The cats had the fat stats that proved the groove that made us move. And when now we be tasked with masks for fast tracks jackin' knick knacks and paddy whacks the joint's gone slack and that's a fact. But still, Seuss was loose as a bird flu goose and now the noose around the neck of lost respect detects the wreck of civilized pride that slides a wide ride straight into some narrow little straightjacket racket. The jig has all gone wrong. I always did kinda like Hips. Botticelli got it right. even smoother groover rock that roll it never gets old with me anyway....lol..hugs...deb 1
Haydn Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 Hipster girls all the way for me. But you can toss in Shakira if she's free on Sundays for a quick bunk up.
Woggle Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 I have never heard of any women making a big deal out of it. Hipsters can be annoying but this has nothing to do with gender.
iris219 Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 Where I live, women love hipsters. You don't sound like a hipster though.
Gaeta Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 Plenty of girls like the hipster look. I have a nephew that has a full blown hipster style and girls of similar style love him. I have a different style. I like being feminine, when I go on a date I wear a sexy little dress with high heels, etc. I remember going on a date with a hipster. he was very tall and skinny, he had a 3 piece suit on but bottom he wore jeans, a pink bow tie, the big black glasses, little necklace, little bracelet. I observed him during our date and said to myself <hmmm noway I can date a man that is more feminine than me>. You just need to find a hipster girl.
littleplanet Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 You know, the more I read some of the replies.....the more of a feeling I get about historic cycles, you know? Like the way 1950's style squares (and good heavens, they could be square) freaked out over the hippies who showed up in the sixties. And of course the dress code thing. When I see a longhair these days I'm astonished. Because the military industrialist regime that Eisenhower warned us all about - won that war. For proof, just check out the hair styles on 999 out of every thousand young men. Hipster look? Marlon Brando........ STELLA! leather jacket / good boots Interesting concept though......paranoia. Buffalo Springfield. Spiro Agnew. 21st century schizoid man. I dunno..... Maybe Ghengis Khan was a hiptser. But whatever it is....I'm still pretty sure it's more about attitude and state of mind, than any particular stylish enslavement. (though personally - I kinda like stylin') 3
Emilia Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 Hipsters are annoying because the whole thing is so pretentious. When I hear the whole compost/healthy eating/cycling thing I just go . It's all affectation. 4
Potz4prez Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 If the guy's a full on hipster, he gives off a feminine and pretentious vibe. Like he perms his beard. Straight girls don't like girls.
Glinda.Good Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 Seriously, I doubt there is "paranoia." Some people are just not into that scene, especially if you live in a formerly cool place that has now been inundated with pretentiousness, like Williamsburg. 2
ktya Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 Is it just me or do many women these days have a major insecurity about dating a guy who might have any "hipster" qualities. ...It seems like when talking to women, the hipster thing comes up a lot, and I can tell they are trying to judge me and/or avoid it like the plague. ... what people would think if seen with a guy who is even mildly "hipster" ... (and suggests less masculinity perhaps). Find a woman who is into your hipsterness, they do exist I see them downtown all the time. However I'm not even a chick and I find hipster dudes to be lame and something I want to avoid. But hey I grew up in a logging town where men were men and hipsters were homosexual. 2
Versacehottie Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 What city or area do you live in? Think that's the biggest key. You would be gold in my city. People would date you precisely BECAUSE of those things which is almost as silly if it's just on the surface. I'm going to guess that you live in a conservative or traditional area where maybe people haven't been exposed to that as much OR the ones that have are too young for your taste. I don't think you should change yourself at all--sounds like it truly is who you are. All you really need to do is change up the groups of people within which you are looking. Switch that up a bit. I would say real estate business and hipster don't normally go together, even in my city so you just have to realize that for your perfect girl she is probably going to be in some not typical mash-up same as you. I think maybe try music and art and volunteering events and online would be good for you. For music and art, even if a person isn't totally immersed in that scene they drag along a friend all the time that may be the perfect mix for you. Also you may meet the person traveling so I would do more of that. But you don't need to change. Just a matter of time. Good luck 1
Versacehottie Posted June 19, 2014 Posted June 19, 2014 Oops and to answer your question about what the hipster paranoia is in women. Well if you like more conservative types or women that have figured themselves out already and aren't similar to you--well quick to judge people see it as a phase you are going through and think you haven't figured yourself out yet. Those that realize you are committed to your lifestyle as it is and it is who you are, realize it's not a fit for them. Incompatible lifestyles. That's why you just need to search different groups. You will find her. Trust. Sounds like you have your sh*t together. Just as you are unique so will she be.
Recommended Posts