maestrok Posted June 16, 2014 Posted June 16, 2014 I don't want to go date anymore. I just want to get married soon, as long as the guy is not a criminal, violent or insane. Is it possible to get married in a month or two? Where can I find someone to do that? tips/advices?
juicygirl Posted June 16, 2014 Posted June 16, 2014 Yes it's possible to get married after a month or two. Even if the person isn't a criminal, violent or insane, most people who rush in to marriage too quickly more often than not end up divorcing because they find that they didn't really know the person they married. Date for at least four seasons and then consider marriage. 6
lonegirl Posted June 17, 2014 Posted June 17, 2014 More important than marriage in itself is the relationship you have with your partner. Marriage is just a social status. Would you rather be married with a douche just for the status or date until you find the right nice person for you? 1
Got it Posted June 17, 2014 Posted June 17, 2014 I think this is a short sighted recipe for disaster. While yes that is possible the likelihood of a happy marriage is slim. Why the drive to be married? What do you think/hope it will fulfill? 3
GoBlue Posted June 17, 2014 Posted June 17, 2014 I am with Got it...if you are not a happy person before you get married you won't be a happy person after you get married. It is way too much pressure to put on your partner. If you take short cuts with dating then you can expect severe trouble in the marriage. I am alone right now myself and I would rather be in a meaningful relationship, but the only thing worse than loneliness is being in a bad relationship.
emeryentropy Posted June 21, 2014 Posted June 21, 2014 Yeah. . I kind of feel similar too. I want to be married in a year or two. I don't enjoy the dating "game" and I just want somebody who is respectable and has things together. I tried dating men around the settle-down age 25-29 but none of them want any type of serious relationship. I really don't think either one of us could quickly find somebody that fits our needs in a month or two and truly be happy though.
Poppygoodwill Posted June 21, 2014 Posted June 21, 2014 I'm really interested in knowing why you feel this way - given the much stronger possibility that a rushed marriage will fail. What is it you think marriage will give you that is worth taking this sort of leap of faith?
ponchsox Posted June 21, 2014 Posted June 21, 2014 Your thread title means you aren't ready. You just don't hurry up and get married soon. A bad marriage is far, far worse than the occasional feeling of loneliness being single. 3
Snakechammah Posted June 21, 2014 Posted June 21, 2014 Actually me too. But in reality, the wedding is expensive and now that I found the candidate, I need the money! Damn the invites to 1000+ relatives, neighbours and their dogs... heck the entire village is coming... sigh...
d0nnivain Posted June 21, 2014 Posted June 21, 2014 I don't want to go date anymore. I just want to get married soon, as long as the guy is not a criminal, violent or insane. Is it possible to get married in a month or two? Where can I find someone to do that? tips/advices? You are putting the cart before the horse. You can't just get married. Well, you can but it's rarely a good idea. You need to spend time with the other person to make sure you are compatible, to see how you both handle the bad stuff, to see how you deal with family issues, to be sad & happy together. There are reasons long engagements are encouraged. getting married is a huge, wonderful & scary step. You can't magically make it work in 60 days. 1
MuscleCarFan Posted June 21, 2014 Posted June 21, 2014 I think this is a short sighted recipe for disaster. While yes that is possible the likelihood of a happy marriage is slim. Why the drive to be married? What do you think/hope it will fulfill? I think this pretty much sums it up. You definitwly NOT ready to get married.
Allumere Posted June 21, 2014 Posted June 21, 2014 I don't want to go date anymore. I just want to get married soon, as long as the guy is not a criminal, violent or insane. Is it possible to get married in a month or two? Where can I find someone to do that? tips/advices? My advice is that you seek some counseling. How old are you? You thinking dating sucks, it ain't nothing compared to a miserable marriage. Sorry, but I think this is way beyond foolish and that you have very un-realistic views on marriage. Of course, I am taking this just from your question.
Realist3 Posted June 21, 2014 Posted June 21, 2014 I don't want to go date anymore. I just want to get married soon, as long as the guy is not a criminal, violent or insane. Is it possible to get married in a month or two? Where can I find someone to do that? tips/advices? My tip and or advice would to stop spending time worrying about getting married and start worrying about finding some self esteem and a good heaping dose of maturity. You mentioned a guy who is not insane. Tell me what guy who is sane would marry someone in two months of knowing them? There are none. If you don't want to date then don't. Take a year off and find you.
Keenly Posted June 21, 2014 Posted June 21, 2014 Do you think so low of yourself that your only standards are what you listed? 2
oldshirt Posted June 22, 2014 Posted June 22, 2014 I don't want to go date anymore. I just want to get married soon, as long as the guy is not a criminal, violent or insane. Is it possible to get married in a month or two? Where can I find someone to do that? tips/advices? Yes it is quite possible. There are lots of lonely men in the world that also don't want to hassle with dating. However anyone can put on a good façade for a month or two and then what you end up with is someone who you thought was a decent person but then find out the hard way that they are abusive or crazy or a cheater etc. I think you need to have a better understanding of what dating is and it's role in mate-selection. Dating is an interview and tryout process where people spend time together doing a variety of things in order to get to know each other and learn what kind of person the other is, in order to determine if that person is a viable match for you or not. if all is well, people move forward to the next stage. if not both parties are under no obligation and each party can end the interview/tryout process without penalty. There are many cultures that practice arranged marriages so that it is the families responsibilities to weed out suitable candidates so the individual can work on other areas of their life and then marry when the time is appropriate. In western society, people select their own mates so time and energy must be budgeted to get to know people so that in picking a mate, you don't get stuck with an abusive or crazy person.
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