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My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years and have been living together for the past year. We both care about each other and are very attached to each other. Everything has been great except for our differences.

 

Since the beginning, I knew we were way too different in our interests (hobbies, food, priorities, perspectives on world news/house keeping, etc) and I've always convinced myself that he's worth keeping because of the way he treats me. For a while, we were both laid back people who let small disagreements go very easily.

 

In the past few months, we've been arguing a lot more and I've realized that both of us are actually quite stubborn. We've tried to compromise on our differences such as trying the things we like individually--I love trying new things but he's the kind of person who always stick with the same routine, and as a result, he ends up not liking any of the things I like (movies, music, food, etc). On the other hand, I'm quite stubborn about being clean, efficient and always in a rush to get things done, but he tends to not pick up after himself and be physically lazy.

 

What are some of the ways (other than compromising) to make us feel more "accepted" considering neither of us want to change ourselves to fit the other person's perspective? Is it worth to break up a relationship like this just because of differences?

 

I have seen "mismatched" couples compromise by allowing each other to do the things they enjoy but I feel like that would further separate the two people--I would really prefer to do the things I enjoy with my significant other, knowing that he'd be enjoying it as much as I do. Is this possible when two people are so different?

 

THANKS!:bunny:

Posted
What are some of the ways (other than compromising) to make us feel more "accepted" considering neither of us want to change ourselves to fit the other person's perspective?

 

At the core of feeling more accepted, it is still compromising. Anything else, is not compromising and continuing to be stubborn.

 

 

I have seen "mismatched" couples compromise by allowing each other to do the things they enjoy but I feel like that would further separate the two people--I would really prefer to do the things I enjoy with my significant other, knowing that he'd be enjoying it as much as I do. Is this possible when two people are so different?

 

You misunderstand how compromising works. It does not separate the couple, but brings them together because each person wants to make it work and make the other one happy. The other problem is, you want your boyfriend to enjoy what you enjoy, which is not possible. You can't control his interests. You can expose him to your interests, show the fun side of it, and hope he will enjoy it. If he doesn't, then just enjoy his company, which is the most important.

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