sunshinelove Posted May 27, 2014 Posted May 27, 2014 (edited) I'm feeling very confused about a certain guy I like, I hope someone will be able to help provide me with some answers! We've dated in the past, and were really into one another, but things didn't work out. I think we took things too fast and we both got quite scared of getting hurt as we were both fresh out of broken long-term relationships. Some time had passed and we got back in contact. We started texting again on a regular basis and we met up for drinks one day. We both agreed we had an awesome time, and that we should do it again. He was suggesting it more than me, and even when we got home he text me and told me how good it was to see me again and that we should do it again. We texted a few days after our 'date' just general chat but nothing was mentioned about meeting up again, although he was being really friendly like he always is. I felt like I was initiating most texts, so I held back to see if he will ask me out or make effort. All my friends said I should let him pursue me, and let him ask me out so I thought I'd see if he would 10 days passed and I finally heard from him, he text asking how I was and if everything was ok? (almost as if he noticed I had stopped reaching out to him) I replied really friendly, told him I had been really busy with work etc, and chatted a bit and asked how he was... He then didn't reply! Now, I am really confused, I had been waiting for him to initiate and when he finally did (meaning he was actually interested) he didn't follow through conversation. So, is he playing games? Did he not like that I stopped contacting for 10 days and is doing the same to me? (I didn't ignore him at all, just didn't initiate anything) Or is he just mega busy and forgotten to get back to me? (doubtful, its now been a week since I replied) Who starts a conversation and then doesn't reply? It doesn't make sense to me! He obviously wanted to hear from me, but then didn't want to carry on conversation? I've contemplated reaching out again, asking if he's ok and how his weekend was. But then I don't want to look like a 'psycho girl' for texting twice. Its almost like I should just take a hint that hes not interested as he hasn't replied. But he was the one to reach out! I'm so confused! What do you guys make of this? Thanks Edited May 27, 2014 by sunshinelove
Survivor12 Posted May 27, 2014 Posted May 27, 2014 The ball is in his court. He may be interested in knowing that YOU are, but if he was actually interested in going out with you, he would ask. I'd write this one off as a dead end. Sorry. 4
Author sunshinelove Posted May 27, 2014 Author Posted May 27, 2014 The ball is in his court. He may be interested in knowing that YOU are, but if he was actually interested in going out with you, he would ask. I'd write this one off as a dead end. Sorry. Could it be possible he thinks I'm not interested so is holding back?
Gaeta Posted May 27, 2014 Posted May 27, 2014 He went for drinks with you, had a good time, went home, was still under the impression he had a good time but when the dust settled he realized he was not THAT interested. These things happen and I have experienced them also. He got back in touch after 10 days probably because he was bored and going through his contact list. Don't put too much energy in this. 1
Author sunshinelove Posted May 27, 2014 Author Posted May 27, 2014 Is it foolish if I reach out and ask him how he is? I just find it so strange that he reached out and then didn't respond when I did
starrynightz45 Posted May 28, 2014 Posted May 28, 2014 I've been in the same boat before. A guy like this either isn't very interested, or doesn't know what the heck he wants/what he's doing. Either way, if you hold out hope for him, you're in for a lot of heartache and drama. I know how you feel - if he's not interested, why the heck initiate conversation and then disappear again!? RIGHT? Seems to make no sense. But guys (and women, too, in some cases) do this when they either don't know if they're interested, don't know what they want, out of boredom, etc. It's better to just let this go and see if he reaches out again. If he's really interested, he will. No doubt, he will. If not, you're better off with someone clear and consistent about his interest. 1
travelbug1996 Posted May 28, 2014 Posted May 28, 2014 i wouldnt reach out to him if i were you. he's not that interested and he needs to be.
jbelle6 Posted May 28, 2014 Posted May 28, 2014 I think us women like to analyze everything a man does over and over for "signs" of what he's thinking. Men are easy to figure out and straightforward if we use logic. If he wanted to ask you out, he'd ask you out. Let him come to you. I would not initiate at this point.
ExpatInItaly Posted May 28, 2014 Posted May 28, 2014 I agree with the others. He's not all that interested. It wouldn't take 10 days for him to get in touch if he was, and certainly he wouldn't wait an entire week to respond after you replied to him. And no, I don't think he waited just because he was holding back. I think he's just letting himself fade out but likes knowing you're still around.
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