JamesWills22 Posted May 22, 2014 Posted May 22, 2014 Hey guys. They say one of the most attractive things about guys is confidence, something I don't have. I'm 19 years old, 5ft 7, and for the past few years I've had a fair run with bad friends and numerous bad relationships, along with a family that I've grown apart from growing up. To say the least; I've only had two real relationships, and never gone further than kissing or cuddling with any girl. About this time last year I had a bit of confidence, I was happy and I said the "right thing at the right time" as my ex had said, however that confidence has deteriorated to hardly anything. I used to be more fun to have around, a little flirty, even found a way to attract them sexually. However, after my recent breakup it has effected me mentally, to some degree I stopped being "fun", I've started talking about different things than I would have, I feel like I am stuck in a shell. I look at my old self and I feel proud, but when I look at myself now I feel pity, there's something I feel pulling me down each time I try to get back up, I hate feeling like this. When I tried to get friends before I had a string of bad friends who would immediately befriend them and take my place, imagine that for about 12 years all the way through school, high-school then college. I kicked them loose about a year ago upon leaving a course I was stuck on them with and I felt good about myself, but now I find it impossible to find friends, my lack of self confidence rattles through every time. I've been told by many people I have a good energy to me, it's just trying to bring that out, bring out the me I've always wanted to be, I feel like I am holding myself back in fear I'm just going to try and fail again. In college I'm referred to as the quiet guy that sits there, I join in some conversation with peers and colleagues in class however I spend most of the time in the corner away from everybody. THIS is me, I've been told I am somewhat attractive even a 7-8 in some girls books, but as I've been told many times my confidence is just lacking. I'm sure this is just in my head, I am capable of being more than what I currently am, I just need that push, to be a better person to who I am instead of seeing all these happy couples and feeling my heart sink I'm missing out on a happy life.
FredJones80 Posted May 22, 2014 Posted May 22, 2014 Don't think its a good idea to post a picture of yourself... especially if your user name is your real name too :/
Author JamesWills22 Posted May 22, 2014 Author Posted May 22, 2014 Don't think its a good idea to post a picture of yourself... especially if your user name is your real name too :/ I don't plan to keep the picture up, I plan on taking it back down soon anyway. I only really put it there to give further insight. But, if it's a safety concern, I'll take it out now.
FredJones80 Posted May 22, 2014 Posted May 22, 2014 I don't plan to keep the picture up, I plan on taking it back down soon anyway. I only really put it there to give further insight. But, if it's a safety concern, I'll take it out now. I'd remove it, but that's your call. If confidence talking to people is a problem, is it possible you can get a part time job working in a shop, like a grocery store, somewhere where you take payment after scanning food (Sorry, I don't know what you call them where you are) Anyway somewhere that you HAVE to talk to customers constantly and be pleasant with them. It helped me so much when I was 18.
Author JamesWills22 Posted May 22, 2014 Author Posted May 22, 2014 I'd remove it, but that's your call. If confidence talking to people is a problem, is it possible you can get a part time job working in a shop, like a grocery store, somewhere where you take payment after scanning food (Sorry, I don't know what you call them where you are) Anyway somewhere that you HAVE to talk to customers constantly and be pleasant with them. It helped me so much when I was 18. It's given me the "You cannot edit this post until 240 minutes after it has been posted." message, ugh:mad: I have tried that before and it helped to some degree, however management always sends me to be the delivery boy, I was forced to quit that job to focus on college some months ago. However, I am slowly getting back on my feet, I am better than I was a few months ago, I just feel like I'm constantly running into a wall still without making much progression. I just thought therapy may help for a little while, I'm going to try write up some emails now and see where that goes.
FredJones80 Posted May 22, 2014 Posted May 22, 2014 It's given me the "You cannot edit this post until 240 minutes after it has been posted." message, ugh:mad: I have tried that before and it helped to some degree, however management always sends me to be the delivery boy, I was forced to quit that job to focus on college some months ago. However, I am slowly getting back on my feet, I am better than I was a few months ago, I just feel like I'm constantly running into a wall still without making much progression. I just thought therapy may help for a little while, I'm going to try write up some emails now and see where that goes. I think any situation you can put yourself in where you are forced to talk to both sexes automatically builds confidence.
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