Michael 93 Posted May 19, 2014 Posted May 19, 2014 A wise man once told me.."the BEST revenge is to live a BRILLIANT LIFE" Be the best you can be!! Work Hard, Love Those Who Love You & Try To Make A Difference Every Time You Wake Up... I am still struggling. And for all of you who have followed my story you all know just how hard this has been on me. However!, I AM better.. If you dedicate focusing time on yourself and improving your own life, this can be small things like, -Join a Gym -Keep on top of your home -Go Jogging -Venture different city's (shout out CHI) -Organize Budgets and Future goals Career plans -Taking charge of work projects Its very difficult to lose... You Should focus all of the energy you have on them into yourself and you will become a much much better person. I sat there one day and said "Enough is Enough, Rather than keep doing this and getting nowhere I am going to show her exactly what she is missing out on, and believe me she is going to regret this" I've made a point of working so damn hard within my department that I'm actually up for "employee of the quarter" for making my company thousands of pounds. Been as though my ex works for the same company can you imagine her little face when the intranet message reads "Congratulations Employee of the Quarter Michael" and then a little paragraph on why... I have since done all of the above and after 5 and a half months I am starting to see the light. I was quite literally the worst for making silly mistakes and being in ridiculous denial (ask Chi or Simon P ) and don't get me wrong, I am still in so much pain every time I wake up but its different. Its not a longing to want to see her or talk to her because I'm dedicated on making myself a better person and showing her exactly what she lost out on... While I am on focusing on getting fitter and progressing within my role, She will still be with the same bouncer hitting on 5 girls a night (believe me i've been informed) getting jacked off steroids every cycle ( Looks about 65yrs old ), not growing from his 5ft 2 Stance.. Each person has different recovery time and I know that. So I just keep on going. You learn to adapt to the situation and the best thing I can suggest is get out there. Work Hard and Love People as you would want to be loved, those who work hard and are kind and generous and willing to be positive will get the same in return I promise you, your time will come. When you are at rock bottom the only way is up.... Believe me. My positivity just happened to be a beer bus full of 24 women who work for my company on Saturday night.. Honestly!! My friend turned around to me half way through that bus and said "Why you still pine over your ex I will never ever know, you have so many women here who love you mate" I got home that night and thought "Man you are right!!!" My point being. Be the best you can be and treat everyone with the respect you would like back. Make positive changes and positivity will enter your life. I promise.... All the best my fellow soldiers! 6
Chi townD Posted May 19, 2014 Posted May 19, 2014 Awesome dude! I love the attitude! Keep it up! I rented a movie over the weekend and I just want to share a little bit of my take of this movie with you. It was called The Secret Life of Walter Mitty. Small spoiler in the next paragraph (although, not enough to ruin the movie) so if you want to watch the movie, skip over my post. So, spoiler alert!!! Walter signed up for eharmony.com but discovered he wasn't getting any winks and he couldn't send any. He calls eharmony and talks to this dude. It is explained that his profile is incomplete. That's because he has nothing to fill it with. He wakes up, goes to work and then goes home. Nothing else. So, events happen in the movie that takes him on adventures and the eharmony dude takes a shine to helping him out. He calls him periodically to help beef up his profile while Walter is out and about. Walter tells him what he's doing and the guy adds it to his profile. Walter went from getting no winks to over 300 in 24hrs. So, the point of that is, if you make yourself interesting, then girls are going to want to get to know you. To see what you're all about. And this can hold true for model girl. She's going to want to stick around and see what new adventure is on the horizon. What you plan on doing next. That's why we pretty much say to new dumpee's not to worry about dating. Get to know you, make positive changes in your life and be adventurous. You do those things and you shouldn't have to worry about finding a girl, they'll find you. But, you need to be warned as well. Your Ex might get word of the things you're doing and get curious. She might reach out to you especially if she thinks you're "buddy, buddy" now. You're still in pain because you can't seem to get into full NC. You got to start with that dude. 3
jt27 Posted May 19, 2014 Posted May 19, 2014 Awesome stuff Michael. Gives us dumpees hope that something better is waiting for us. I too am doing all those things you listed and though positivity is still rare right now, it's showing up a little more often. We only hold ourselves back not our exes! 1
Author Michael 93 Posted May 20, 2014 Author Posted May 20, 2014 Awesome stuff Michael. Gives us dumpees hope that something better is waiting for us. I too am doing all those things you listed and though positivity is still rare right now, it's showing up a little more often. We only hold ourselves back not our exes! Thank you man. That was exactly my aim so I'm pleased it has had that affect on you. How are you doing? I totally understand. Believe me it is not all plain sailing. I just know how devastating this can be on a person therefore would like to give them just a little bit of inspiration. I aim to stay on this site as long as it takes to give back the help and guidance others have given me..
Author Michael 93 Posted May 20, 2014 Author Posted May 20, 2014 @Chi townD Mannnn.. I am renting that this weekend! I plan on giving my liver and legs a break for the next few weeks now and focus on improving financially so any more suggestions will be greatly appreciated! Still struggling on how to be adventurous whilst staying in though! I'm constantly trying to search for positive things to get involved with however money is limiting some of those at the moment.
jt27 Posted May 20, 2014 Posted May 20, 2014 I would love to tell you I am doing great but that would be a lie. I am on the constant roller coaster. I dream about her every night and see her everywhere I go. As soon as I wake up she enters my mind and doesn't leave it. I have the overwhelming feeling of loss and just want her back. I am shattered right now but just trying to do things to improve myself. Everyday is a struggle but I have hope it will get better. Thanks man. 1
learning_slowly Posted May 20, 2014 Posted May 20, 2014 I would love to tell you I am doing great but that would be a lie. I am on the constant roller coaster. I dream about her every night and see her everywhere I go. As soon as I wake up she enters my mind and doesn't leave it. I have the overwhelming feeling of loss and just want her back. I am shattered right now but just trying to do things to improve myself. Everyday is a struggle but I have hope it will get better. Thanks man. Jt, don't be so tough on yourself . It's only been a month and a half since you joined. Can you not get out to meet people, e.g. barbecues etc. The main problem is most couples get used to doing a lot together, so youre missing the company. So do whatever you can to make new companions. It doesn't mean they have to be a romantic interest, but just people to spend your life with
jt27 Posted May 20, 2014 Posted May 20, 2014 Can you not get out to meet people, e.g. barbecues etc. Thanks slowly. I get out often. I take every opportunity I can to be social. Sporting events, bbq, happy hours, etc. I work out almost everyday. I am constantly doing home improvements. I am talking with a therapist. I try to keep myself busy and in the company of others when possible. When I said she never leaves my mind, I should have said she only leaves my mind temporarily. Most times I can't escape the thought of her. I am coming to terms if will take me a long time to get over her.
RDawg Posted May 20, 2014 Posted May 20, 2014 Well done Michael. Keep up the good work and the positive energy. Salute! 1
Chi townD Posted May 20, 2014 Posted May 20, 2014 I know I do some pretty crazy trips and travels. But, I just don't decide on one weekend to pack my stuff and take off to Antarctica. It takes months and months of planning and saving. It's not something I an do off the cuff and just go because of financial reasons as well. But, I can't wait a year without taking some kind of trip. I have to do something else. Normally, it can be a weekend away to go to a festival or something. For instance, this coming weekend the wife and I are traveling about an hour from my house to a state park that apparently has a couple of waterfalls in it. So, the wife and I are going to spend the day hiking to find these elusive waterfalls. What's it going to cost me? Not much, gas (petro) money, lunch and parking costs. But, I get to spend the day in nature, spend the day with my wife and some amazing photo opportunities. And that's it! There's got to be some things to do in the UK that is cheap or middle of the road with costs. What about the Green Man Festival that's happening in August? Hell, I'm in the States and I knew about this! All it takes is a computer with Google and you can find stuff to do. 1
Author Michael 93 Posted May 21, 2014 Author Posted May 21, 2014 Well done Michael. Keep up the good work and the positive energy. Salute! Thank you my man. Appreciated.
Author Michael 93 Posted May 21, 2014 Author Posted May 21, 2014 I know I do some pretty crazy trips and travels. But, I just don't decide on one weekend to pack my stuff and take off to Antarctica. It takes months and months of planning and saving. It's not something I an do off the cuff and just go because of financial reasons as well. But, I can't wait a year without taking some kind of trip. I have to do something else. Normally, it can be a weekend away to go to a festival or something. For instance, this coming weekend the wife and I are traveling about an hour from my house to a state park that apparently has a couple of waterfalls in it. So, the wife and I are going to spend the day hiking to find these elusive waterfalls. What's it going to cost me? Not much, gas (petro) money, lunch and parking costs. But, I get to spend the day in nature, spend the day with my wife and some amazing photo opportunities. And that's it! There's got to be some things to do in the UK that is cheap or middle of the road with costs. What about the Green Man Festival that's happening in August? Hell, I'm in the States and I knew about this! All it takes is a computer with Google and you can find stuff to do. On it Chi!
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