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Why is it getting harder and not easier to move on?


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Posted

Ok so my ex and I broke up about a month ago. She broke up with me, which I knew it was coming but the reason our relationship changed was because she changed as a person IMO(sorority, partying more, friends were single). I loved this girl so much but it was time for a break. I have gone no contact with her for a whole month and we haven't talked any except for she texted me on graduation and I simply texted back Thanks. It is actually getting harder now to go no contact. I miss her even though she changed. I think it is because the good memories keep popping up in my head and making me miss her. I'm gonna stay strong with the no contact but any words or advice would be greatly appreciated!

Posted

There is no doubt on that you are really love her, but if she doesn't care about you then why are you thinking about her..so first of all you have to stop thinking about her and if you can then try to think some negative points of her so you can divert your mind from her, try to develop new skills, join the gym, hanging out with your friends.. this are the common things to used in move on from someone..

Posted

You miss the old her, the her that just isn't going to come back.

 

It's only been 1 month, it gets a lot worse.

 

Keep busy.

Posted

Have a look at this and burn it in your eyes and head and heart!! I'm being serious.. Reply it over and over again!! Whenever you miss her or think about the old times.

 

My Girlfriend Just Dumped Me - Mark Manson

 

How To Get Your Dream Girl Off The Pedestal: The Cure For Oneitis - YouTube

 

Breakup Survival -- Why A Fresh Breakup Is Your Best Chance To Get Good At Game! - YouTube

 

Go to youtube and search for 'motivation speeches' to keep you strong as well trust me.

 

 

Keep busy man.. i mean hella busy..if u sit there doing nothing for 10mins i gaurantee you will start feeling the anxiety and depression. I Do push ups or sits up just to exhaust myself.. Now I'm toning up! Awsome

 

I hope this helps Some of you!!

Posted

I think you've nailed it on the head....the farther you get from the trauma of breakup day, the more nostalgic and sentimental you become. The truth of being on your own sinks in, and you start to doubt - consciously or not - the reasons why you broke up. It's very common and will get more intense probably for a while, adn then it will get easier adn easier.

 

One day, believe it or not, you are goign to look back and barely feel anything. Trust me, that day will come.

 

In the meantime, do more of what you're doing to maintain no contact - be busy, as the other poster said. Occupy yourself. Don't give your mind time to wander down memory lane; no good can come of that.

 

Just keep moving forward and one day, in the not too distant future, you'll find yourself on higher ground.

Posted

I'm guessing you just graduated from HS while she is finsihing up her 1st year of college?

 

You probably invisioned all the stuff that you did for her after graduation & feel like you aren't getting that which is what's making you sad.

 

You will feel better if you realign your thinking. Summer's coming. It's a fun time of year. You will be off to college or the next phase of your life where new adventures await you.

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