itsallmental Posted April 28, 2014 Posted April 28, 2014 It has only been a month since she left me for someone else. Summer is coming up, I'm sure I'll see her around town. But I really want to stop using so much mental energy on thinking about her. I'm so tired of it. I want appreciation, intimacy, companionship, and love in my life, but not from her. How do I get it through my head that she's not coming back? She left me, why would she? I'm better off without her. the only way I'd ever consider reconciliation is if she stepped over mountains to show me she made a mistake. Unfortunately, as logical as I can be, she's still on my mind all day long. I've been doing lots of school work, getting out of weekends, going to parties, learning guitar, but I still think of her. I'm worn out, I want to move on. Maybe the simple answer is that time is my best friend? I unfriended her on facebook, I don't check her page, and we haven't spoken but a handful of necessary times since our break up. But I guess I'm still holding onto something... even if I don't want to. Any advice of a hard day? Thanks!
STM206 Posted April 28, 2014 Posted April 28, 2014 I'd appreciate some advice as well. I can't seem to let him go, foolishly I still hold onto hope that he'll reach out and can't seek to think of a life with anyone else. 2
Poppyolive Posted April 28, 2014 Posted April 28, 2014 Here's some things that helped me: #1 buy a new journal and start writing things you are grateful for...a few lines nightly before bed....as you write them, feel them....the more you write things you are grateful for the more things you see in your day to be grateful for. It will in time shift your mind from negetative poor me blues, to clarity, freshness and a light will respark inside. #2 when thoughts, feelings, memories resurface embrace them. Talk to them....example a certain memory pops into your head like a time you both laughed so hard together...smile at that, when your mind shifts to sadness because you are no more. Say to yourself I'll give this a few minutes of my time. Then move on to something uplifting. Even if it's blasting so fav music. #3 make a to do list. A weekly one of errands and a bigger list of goals things you can now do because you are single....new course, art class, learn an instrument, organize a fun Sumner party. #4 keep everything blocked and any memories, gifts, photos put away. #5 draw up a picture of your perfect partner and relationship. Thinga you want different next time round. Write down things you have learned....things you are grateful you have learned. #6 take yourself on a date once a week....movie, ice cream, new CD, live music. And stick to it! #7 find some guided meditation either at a class or you'd be surprised what you'll find on you tube.. Do this nightly after your gratitude writings....it will begin to feel good and you'll have a smile on your face going to bed, wake up rejuvenated. #8 take care of your health exercise, take care of your diet eat well and fresh, take care of your heart. Fall in love all over with yourself. No I'm not on drugs.. Teehee these are things that helped me after a five year relationship, being dumped and bullied. He jumped into another relationship a month or two after... I was writing how I was feeling, I wrote all MY anger. Everyday I'd look at the book afraid to look back at the previous pages.. That's when j decided to shift my thinking pattern and followed my above steps/goals 1
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