bafflio Posted April 15, 2014 Posted April 15, 2014 I am trying to get along with this girl I know but she's really shy and avoidant. What is a cool way to get back if she says 'What are you doing?' while I am flirting with her (i.e. body contact, etc.)? I was trying to think a good come-back line but it still avoids me..
hasaquestion Posted April 15, 2014 Posted April 15, 2014 I am trying to get along with this girl I know but she's really shy and avoidant. What is a cool way to get back if she says 'What are you doing?' while I am flirting with her (i.e. body contact, etc.)? I was trying to think a good come-back line but it still avoids me.. Wait is not being interested in you a medical condition? And I thought I was cocky 1
nescafe1982 Posted April 15, 2014 Posted April 15, 2014 Avoidant behaviors are usually pretty clear indicators of no interest/attraction, OP. I'd back off. 3
GemmaUK Posted April 15, 2014 Posted April 15, 2014 I am trying to get along with this girl I know but she's really shy and avoidant. What is a cool way to get back if she says 'What are you doing?' while I am flirting with her (i.e. body contact, etc.)? I was trying to think a good come-back line but it still avoids me.. 'What are you doing?' along with being avoidant sound like she doesn't want to be flirted with by you. ..if that was what happened.. What were you doing by way of 'flirting' exactly?
HappyLove Posted April 15, 2014 Posted April 15, 2014 I think you need to lay it on the line and just ask her out already. We can argue all day that it's because she's shy or because she doesn't like you. Ask her on a date, stop thinking of cutesy vague things to say. Ask her point blank and if she says yes, you got yourself a date...if she says no you can move on. 1
truth_seeker Posted April 15, 2014 Posted April 15, 2014 Avoidant behaviors are usually pretty clear indicators of no interest/attraction, OP. I'd back off. Not entirely true. If the guy is ugly, then yes. If he's very good-looking, it's nervousness on her part or games.
PogoStick Posted April 15, 2014 Posted April 15, 2014 Tell her you have a disorder that causes you to flirt with attractive women. 5
Author bafflio Posted April 15, 2014 Author Posted April 15, 2014 I know she is much more shy than any other girl I met. She is not very open or friendly at all to anyone. My approach may be uncomfortable for her but I want to push as far as I can before she says **** off. I asked how to find a witty response if she were to get alarmed or defensive. Ideally I hope I don't find myself in such a situation but this is quite possible. If you can't tell me one well then I'll have to find one I guess.
stillafool Posted April 15, 2014 Posted April 15, 2014 I don't care how shy a girl is if she likes you she will not avoid you. Her behavior toward you is screaming - LEAVE ME ALONE!
Author bafflio Posted April 15, 2014 Author Posted April 15, 2014 I don't care how shy a girl is if she likes you she will not avoid you. Her behavior toward you is screaming - LEAVE ME ALONE! Um what behavior? You do realized this is a hypothetical scenario - she has never said that yet. I wanna make a move and I wanna see what I can do if she says 'What are you doing'. I don't think saying 'What are you doing' totally means LEAVE ME ALONE. It's not like I'm forcing her to meet me..
HappyLove Posted April 15, 2014 Posted April 15, 2014 What do you mean you wanna make a move? Don't touch her because yes she'd have every right to be avoiding you. If she says no if you ask her out no witty come back is necessary. Sounds like you're making too much out of a simple thing.
Author bafflio Posted April 15, 2014 Author Posted April 15, 2014 What do you mean you wanna make a move? Don't touch her because yes she'd have every right to be avoiding you. If she says no if you ask her out no witty come back is necessary. Sounds like you're making too much out of a simple thing. Right now I just got to know her. If I start flirting I'm anticipating such defenses and I am not gonna run away with my tails down at the slightest hint of discomfort from her. I was asking a way to make her feel more comfortable and relaxed when I'm flirting but obviously that is not getting across to most people here so I'm done askin'
Hello_is_it_me Posted April 15, 2014 Posted April 15, 2014 There are enough threads on here asking how to flirt with RECEPTIVE women! Now we have to deal with THIS? 1
Author bafflio Posted April 15, 2014 Author Posted April 15, 2014 There are enough threads on here asking how to flirt with RECEPTIVE women! Now we have to deal with THIS? Sigh because flirting with receptive women is way easier?
Hello_is_it_me Posted April 15, 2014 Posted April 15, 2014 Sigh because flirting with receptive women is way easier? I would seriously hope so!
NoMoreJerks Posted April 16, 2014 Posted April 16, 2014 Avoidant behaviors are usually pretty clear indicators of no interest/attraction, OP. I'd back off. That's not true. Depends on what he means by "avoidant". I tend to be very very shy and reserved on the first few dates and before going out... and generally not my more outgoing self around someone I like who I am not sure likes me back.. but once I cross that stage I become "normal" with that person..
nescafe1982 Posted April 16, 2014 Posted April 16, 2014 That's not true. Depends on what he means by "avoidant". I tend to be very very shy and reserved on the first few dates and before going out... and generally not my more outgoing self around someone I like who I am not sure likes me back.. but once I cross that stage I become "normal" with that person.. Ah, but you're going on dates. That is in and of itself showing interest. The woman OP is talking about is avoiding him, dodging his attempts to flirt, and seems to have made at least one attempt to directly ask him to stop flirting with her (e.g. calling him out by asking "...what are you doing?") Totally different scenario.
truth_seeker Posted April 16, 2014 Posted April 16, 2014 I don't care how shy a girl is if she likes you she will not avoid you. If she is intimidated she will.
RonaldS Posted April 16, 2014 Posted April 16, 2014 Her: 'What are you doing?' You: 'You...in about 15 minutes.' See how easy that was?
RonaldS Posted April 16, 2014 Posted April 16, 2014 I don't care how shy a girl is if she likes you she will not avoid you. Not true at all. I've had a number of women that I've known over the years who were distant, untalkative, avoidant, even b*tchy...so much so that I never even bothered to try with them...but then ended up getting a few drinks in them and then admitting they had huge crushes on me. Girls get intimidated just like guys do.
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