Author Popsicle Posted April 15, 2014 Author Share Posted April 15, 2014 Hello. Just thought I would add as I know a lot of you think that when your exMM choose their family they are all happy and don't think of you. I know from personal experience being a exMW that even though I ended it with my MM, I think about him all the time. I have a lovely family life and we as a family are always doing special things and we get some great photos from that, BUT my exMM is always in my thoughts and my heart and I would rather be doing them all with him and I know he feels the same. So please take the photos you see with a pinch of salt. I know you and I have to accept that it's over and move on but I am not sure anger or hate is the way forward, I know that has been suggested a few times. I believe what you had was special but just not possible. He will be thinking of you all the time just has to man up and be the father and husband he promised to be. But you are important and special and now need to find true love with someone that can give themselves totally to you - I know easier said than done. And the MM probably wont find true love within the marriage but acceptance of the life they need to live. So in the end you are the winner, one day finding true love with someone and you won't make the mistake of marrying the wrong person because you know where that leads. Sorry for my rambling post. No it was very beautiful and thoughtful. It helped a lot. Thank you so much for taking the time to post to me. Link to post Share on other sites
Mickey1982 Posted April 15, 2014 Share Posted April 15, 2014 Popsicle, just rememeber that you are not alone and we ALL know what you are feeling. It may not make it any easier, but we are here you for you. I have no idea how I would have it through the past few weeks without my friends on LS. Keep posting when you need support, popsicle! HUGS-----Mickey 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ZMM Posted April 15, 2014 Share Posted April 15, 2014 Popsicle - you know we are all here for you. Just know, he obviously cares about you and likes you. Maybe you needed to know that. Now, you can move on however you see fit. Be positive! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Popsicle Posted April 16, 2014 Author Share Posted April 16, 2014 Uh oh. Just when I started to accept that "we" will never be and that I need to move on and forget, guess who called me today and left a voicemail? Link to post Share on other sites
Mickey1982 Posted April 16, 2014 Share Posted April 16, 2014 Uh oh. Just when I started to accept that "we" will never be and that I need to move on and forget, guess who called me today and left a voicemail? ...And, what are you going to do? Or what have you done? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Popsicle Posted April 16, 2014 Author Share Posted April 16, 2014 ...And, what are you going to do? Or what have you done? I don't know. He said he would try to get in touch with me again later. He was calling from a phone line that you can not receive calls back on. I didn't try to track him down on his cell phone, I just emailed him to tell him I got his message and that I was tied up when he called. I don't know what I'm going to do. I have to think about it. I don't feel like I want to be involved with him romantically anymore (too painful), but I don't know if he necessarily wants to be romantically involved either. He's not real good at communicating anyway, so it's not like he's going to be blowing my phone up or anything. Plus, it appears that he can only talk/call during weekday work hours and I am generally not available to talk during those times. Link to post Share on other sites
jwi71 Posted April 16, 2014 Share Posted April 16, 2014 I don't know. He said he would try to get in touch with me again later. He was calling from a phone line that you can not receive calls back on. I didn't try to track him down on his cell phone, I just emailed him to tell him I got his message and that I was tied up when he called. I don't know what I'm going to do. I have to think about it. I don't feel like I want to be involved with him romantically anymore (too painful), but I don't know if he necessarily wants to be romantically involved either. He's not real good at communicating anyway, so it's not like he's going to be blowing my phone up or anything. Plus, it appears that he can only talk/call during weekday work hours and I am generally not available to talk during those times. Care to script us the ending you wish? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Popsicle Posted April 16, 2014 Author Share Posted April 16, 2014 Care to script us the ending you wish? Good idea. Hmm... Ideally, we would remain in contact sporadically and platonically friendly. We would both be mature enough to do this and both would initiate. I will find the love of my life and tell him all about it and he will eat his heart out. Link to post Share on other sites
jwi71 Posted April 16, 2014 Share Posted April 16, 2014 Good idea. Hmm... Ideally, we would remain in contact sporadically and platonically friendly. We would both be mature enough to do this and both would initiate. I will find the love of my life and tell him all about it and he will eat his heart out. LOL. OK,I laughed at that. I think every human has been there. Do you think you CAN be friends? Do you think, when you DO meet a man worthy of you, you will share the truth of this "friend" (provided he remains such)? Why or why not? And I'll tell you now - its hard for lovers to be remain friends (my opinion) and IMPOSSIBLE for AP's to do so - lets face it, would you want your SO to remain chummy with HIS old AP? I sure as hell wouldn't. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Popsicle Posted April 16, 2014 Author Share Posted April 16, 2014 LOL. OK,I laughed at that. I think every human has been there. Do you think you CAN be friends? Do you think, when you DO meet a man worthy of you, you will share the truth of this "friend" (provided he remains such)? Why or why not? And I'll tell you now - its hard for lovers to be remain friends (my opinion) and IMPOSSIBLE for AP's to do so - lets face it, would you want your SO to remain chummy with HIS old AP? I sure as hell wouldn't. Well, we've never slept together. And whether or not I remain in contact with him after I find a guy will be up to my new guy. More than likely MM won't want to remain in contact either (he seems the jealous/possessive type). Link to post Share on other sites
ZMM Posted April 16, 2014 Share Posted April 16, 2014 LOL. OK,I laughed at that. I think every human has been there. Do you think you CAN be friends? Do you think, when you DO meet a man worthy of you, you will share the truth of this "friend" (provided he remains such)? Why or why not? And I'll tell you now - its hard for lovers to be remain friends (my opinion) and IMPOSSIBLE for AP's to do so - lets face it, would you want your SO to remain chummy with HIS old AP? I sure as hell wouldn't. Due to the nature of your relationship - I think you could remain friends. But, that is only if you both want to. I do hope all this makes you feel better about yourself, because you should. Link to post Share on other sites
Mickey1982 Posted April 16, 2014 Share Posted April 16, 2014 Due to the nature of your relationship - I think you could remain friends. But, that is only if you both want to. I do hope all this makes you feel better about yourself, because you should. ZMM...my guess is that you support the friendship beacuse they were not lovers...is that correct? Link to post Share on other sites
ZMM Posted April 16, 2014 Share Posted April 16, 2014 ZMM...my guess is that you support the friendship beacuse they were not lovers...is that correct? Yes, that is why I think it wouldn't be that difficult. But, I also think it is possible the other way too. There may need to be a cooling off period and both people would have to really want that, as it isn't easy. Plus it could interfere with their main relationship with their new SO. It just really depends on all parties involved. But in Popsicle's case, I don't think it would be nearly as difficult. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Popsicle Posted April 16, 2014 Author Share Posted April 16, 2014 Due to the nature of your relationship - I think you could remain friends. But, that is only if you both want to. I do hope all this makes you feel better about yourself, because you should. Thanks. I don't know what he wants, tbh. I'm just going to play it cool and see what happens. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ZMM Posted April 17, 2014 Share Posted April 17, 2014 Thanks. I don't know what he wants, tbh. I'm just going to play it cool and see what happens. Good plan. Link to post Share on other sites
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