Kmacmahon Posted April 13, 2014 Posted April 13, 2014 So on Friday night my ex finished me because 'he fell out of love with me'. I am now heartbroken and very confused. Basically we've been going out for 8 months and during that time, I was accusing him of things. He's 8 years older than me and previous to me he had a relationship for 8 years. Me being me thought I'm never going to compete with that. So I accused him of still fancying his ex and other past flings he's had. I also accused him of fancying people he wouldn't dream of doing. Deep down I knew all this yet I had to make sure just for reassurance which was absolutely stupid of me. I even gained help from a professional therapist but had to stop because it was getting too expensive. Up until a few weeks ago I stopped doing it and it worked, I still nagged him like any other girlfriend I felt guilty and was scared that he was gunna leave me but he assured me he wasn't. I got texts last Wednesday saying he loved me so much, I'm the most gorgeous beautiful amazing person he's ever met, the previous week he said that it will take time to get back on track but I'm getting better .. That he wants to spend the rest of his life with me and that he will never fall out of love with me! Yet Friday night when he was leg less he decides to finish me because we were having banter and he couldn't handle things being said to him. He said he's been unhappy for awhile and he's fallen out of love with me? He's told me he loves me and that I'm still amazing , but he's fallen out of love with me? I don't get it! That is why I'm very confused. I've said sorry for how I was I've asked this past week of anythings been bugging him, he said nope he was fine. Why didn't he just tell me? He said he was trying to convince himself? If you ask me it's a poor excuse! He's got money issues at the moment, his mates have moved out of his flat so he's abit upset with that. I may have been A paranoid childish pathetic girl but I love him so much and I'd do anything for that man! I just feel so empty and heartbroken. I'm confused though if anything! I've not texted him today and I don't intend for a few days. I have some things at his place though so I will need them back at some point.. What do you think though people? Will he come to his senses and has literally took his money issues and everything out on me? Or is it for good !? I don't know, I need answers I just don't get it! Thanks for reading ! X
KaliLove Posted April 13, 2014 Posted April 13, 2014 First and foremost, I'm very sorry you're hurting. It's not a poor excuse..it's most likely the truth. He probably was trying to convince himself that he still wanted to be with you when he was telling you he loved you and such because he didn't want to hurt you. Have you read the NC guide yet? It's pinned in this section. It's preferable to have a third party take care of exchanging things (can you do that?), but text him about your things if you must but do not resort to begging or lots of emotion. There's no point. If he wants you back, he'll come back..but honestly, don't count on it. 8 months is not a very long time. If he's already feeling this way less than a year into the relationship, he's probably not going to come back. It does sound like you have a lot of trust issues to work through, and that you did behave immaturely throughout the relationship. I'm glad you're aware of that and are working on fixing it already. You'll be ok in the end. Just get your stuff back and then go full NC. You'll heal quicker than you think. 1
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