purplestars Posted April 12, 2014 Posted April 12, 2014 Just need some helpful words or advice... Me and my ex were together for 6 months and in that time we went through just about everything. I lost my virginity to him and I ended up getting pregnant. He was supportive through the entire thing, stepped up got a job and was the best man you could ask for. Then sadly in December we had a miscarriage. The worst experience of my life, and he was there for me the entire time. After i had the miscarriage he gave me a promise ring and was faithful the entire time. Unfortunately i made a mistake of early in the relationship flirting with guys and in February he saw these messages and things weren't the same. He said he couldn't break up with me because he loved me too much so we stayed together but he made sure i lived with the mistake i made. He stopped caring, and he said he had nightmares of me cheating and it just got worse and worse to the point that one night we got in a fight and broke up. Im usually strict on no contact but he kept texting me afterwards and i texted him for a good month. However, my feelings began to overwhelm me and i met up with him and told him i wanted to work on our relationship and i loved him and i didnt want to be with anyone else. However, he said hes in a worse spot in his life than when he entered the relationship (no job, car, money) and put me first the entire relationship and forgot about himself. So now he wants to focus on getting things together before he focuses on working on the relationship.Also hes still not over what i did previously. So i told him i respected that but would no longer be able to just be friends with him and if he felt like he got his life together and if he could forgive than he could contact me. He looked hurt when i said this and i tried to say goodbye but he was stalling like he didnt want me to leave. But when i was finally going he still said "But i still have to come over because your mom said for me to come to dinner soon" and i told him not to worry about it. And we said bye. Since then he went on a rampage and recently had sex with this girl that he cut off before he started dating me. He knew i would find out and it is killing me to know he did this. I wish the pain would go away but i dont know how to deal, i thought he really did love me but if he can have sex like that he obviously doesnt care. What i would like to know is do you guys think hes just doing it because he needs sex? To get back at him for hurting me? Or he just doesnt care about anything anymore? Thanks
Trovador Posted April 12, 2014 Posted April 12, 2014 So, he is broken for a relationship but not for frolicking like a rabbit... IMHO only animals needs sex, human beings need a connection, a transcendence, a completeness if you will, men who just fck "to" a woman see the latter as a recipient, an object, a... but I disagree... who knows how a woman who just fcks a man feels since I belong to the opposite force... However, that's not the problem I think, but a consequence of the problem... Sadly, personally, there are a lot of things forgivable in a woman but flirting, cheating, sexting, liking other men (in sum, acting as a single) are beyond my humanity... obviously, this apparently innocent flirting was the catalyst of the demise of your relationship as you acknowledge it... maybe he stayed just to pay you back and or while he removed his feelings for you... Whatever the reason, I do think you both need to stay apart for some time...
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