2sunny Posted February 17, 2014 Posted February 17, 2014 Some girl just posted a pic of him kissing some girl. It looks like a joke but I'm seriously so hurt. Should I just delete him off Facebook and snapchat? Sure! Then you might be available mentally got a decent guy!
Author emoore2013 Posted February 17, 2014 Author Posted February 17, 2014 Updates! My friend who this guy kissed told me that he actually thinks I'm crazy. She also found out from his friend that he is the village idiot of his friend group and that he smooth talks his way into having girls sleep with him. Safe to say I'm done with him!
Author emoore2013 Posted February 18, 2014 Author Posted February 18, 2014 So basically my ex FWB tried to use me on Valentines day after claiming he was concerned about me and thought I could use a friend. That night he was asking a lot of questions so it seemed like he was actually concerned but since this happened at 2 am and on valentines day it seems like he was just lonely. We only made out and things ended badly when I started getting emotional. The entire time he kept on insisting he just wanted to talk. I texted him the next day with no response and he basically ignored me when I saw him out. I found out my best friend who he kissed (he claimed it didn't mean anything and didn't know) said he is the village idiot of his friend group, who lied about being in a frat and doesn't have the grades he said he did. He also told her he thinks I'm crazy. So I texted him again saying "you're a douche, I know what you told my friend about me and you're not even in the frat so stop thinking you are." He didn't respond yet he is still looking at my snapchats. What do you think he's thinking at this point?
Leigh 87 Posted February 18, 2014 Posted February 18, 2014 I can you exactly what he was thinking: " I enjoy having sex with this girl and I can tolerate being around her (he may or may not like being around you; men don't have to like being around a girl in order to want sex from them" He wanted sex, he wanted his needs met. Those are the only two reasons why a guy would call a girl at 2am. He is showing you through his actions that you are booty call material to him. He said you were crazy. He called you for a booty call on Valentines day. When you got emotional, he pulled the " I just wanted someone to talk to" crap, because he didn't want to continue with you knowing you were emotional. He rang you at 2am. He wanted sex. You got emotional so he bailed. What else is there that you need to know? You are acting desperate. You are acting pathetic. Really, you got all emotional with him:sick: This man called you at 2am! What in the world drove you to think "getting emotional" would be a good idea, with a man like this? He thinks you're crazy because he clearly SHOWS you that he is not that into you, yet you clearly have feelings for him and continue to think about him a lot. Please stop writing about this guy. I have been there before too, I wrote about guys who disappeared on me, two of them to be exact. It is pathetic to write about men and put actual thought or ENERGY into men that just aren't into us. You shouldn't write about guys who call you for booty calls. You should conserve your energy for dealing with the men who are crazy about you and want to date you seriously. 1
SYLLPalmer Posted February 18, 2014 Posted February 18, 2014 One thought is that he is sizing you up. He may now see you as an adversary and is skulking around to see what you are up to and perhaps contemplating his next move. He has no moves left from what it seems. Forget him. He is a douche bag.
LEEVIT2F8 Posted February 18, 2014 Posted February 18, 2014 Ex FWB? Call at 2am? Made out and you got emotional? Then he bailed? He came over for a booty call. You became a pain to deal with so hes out. Text him and tell him your sorry for getting emotional and to come over because you owe him a blow job. Watch how quickly that text gets answered. Then you will have your answer pretty fast. It is what it is. Either get to blowing or get to going. LOL 3
Author emoore2013 Posted February 18, 2014 Author Posted February 18, 2014 I liked him because he would regularly check up on me while I was away from school, and he's the only guy I tried having sex with. We were exclusive for a while, so that's what made me fall for him. He knew I still liked him after the text I sent. Then he said he wanted to come over to "talk". And we did talk for a while, but then things went south when the convo turned to our relationship. He said he didn't want to hurt me feelings by staying over even though he wanted to. Is he hurt that I fell for him and he couldn't reciprocate. I truly think he wanted to continue the FWB thing but doesn't have the capacity for a relationship.
Leigh 87 Posted February 18, 2014 Posted February 18, 2014 I had a FWB last November. He fell head over heals in love with me. It is VERY obvious when a FWB falls hard for you. You would KNOW if he had developed feelings for you........ I have also had FWB who developed some feelings for me.. but not earth shaterringly. He was very fond of me. He had feelings. As did I for him... just not enough to HAVE tl ne together. We only met up 3 times and he had a girl overseas who he was unsure of when he met me... I have had experience with FWB. It was glaringly obvious when one of them fell in love with me. Even the guy who didn't fall in love.. he messaged me daily, and he took me out and paid for dinner before we hooked up. We enjoyed each other a lot. That doesn't mean he wanted to complicated things. ... if he/a guy wanted to take things to the next level, he would have.
Leigh 87 Posted February 18, 2014 Posted February 18, 2014 I liked him because he would regularly check up on me while I was away from school, and he's the only guy I tried having sex with. We were exclusive for a while, so that's what made me fall for him. He knew I still liked him after the text I sent. Then he said he wanted to come over to "talk". And we did talk for a while, but then things went south when the convo turned to our relationship. He said he didn't want to hurt me feelings by staying over even though he wanted to. Is he hurt that I fell for him and he couldn't reciprocate. I truly think he wanted to continue the FWB thing but doesn't have the capacity for a relationship. He does have the capacity to have a committed relationship. He just doesn't want one with you. You sound sweet. Why not forget guys who call you at 2am for a booty call and try to leave when you talk about your feelings?
Author emoore2013 Posted February 18, 2014 Author Posted February 18, 2014 He does have the capacity to have a committed relationship. He just doesn't want one with you. You sound sweet. Why not forget guys who call you at 2am for a booty call and try to leave when you talk about your feelings? I know he doesn't want one with me. But what makes me think that he can't have a committed relationship are his mannerisms and the fact that he hadn't had a relationship at all. Also, my friend said he smooth talks his way into getting girls to sleep with him. Anyway, we were exclusive at one point but when things started to get serious, he bolted.
Leigh 87 Posted February 18, 2014 Posted February 18, 2014 I know he doesn't want one with me. But what makes me think that he can't have a committed relationship are his mannerisms and the fact that he hadn't had a relationship at all. Also, my friend said he smooth talks his way into getting girls to sleep with him. Anyway, we were exclusive at one point but when things started to get serious, he bolted. Well yes, it is certainly true that some men are just not apt at finding/having relationships. For whatever reason/s, they just are not rooting to settle down and commit to one woman. I still believe that most men like this will come across a woman who will make them change all this.. they will just change the way the feel and the way they act. When a guy meets "that girl" that he really has a thing for, plenty of commitment averse men will simply fall too hard for certain girls to risk losing them; they may try and fail at having a commitment sort of arrangement with these girls. I think most men will want to continue seeing a girl exclusively once he meets "that girl" It is rare to meet these people in life who we just unexplainably "feel" so much towards...and on levels you didn't know existed until meeting them. So it is safe to say that this guy is probably sweet talking as many women as possible in order to get into their pants:sick: You should try to not think/write about this douche anymore. What is the point of thinking enough about a guy to write about him, when he has ZERO investment or feelings about you? I try to only care about people in proportion to how much they care for me;) If he knew you wrote this about him, he would think you were crazy. He'd be like " wtf, what is this sh*t? We banged a few times and she is getting all emotional?" Try not to put so much emphasis on disinterest. He aint interested, yet you write about him. Calling you at 2am ands bolting when you got emotional is as clear as you can get; that a man is not into you. Man, I mean... Geez, the three guys I wrote about before meeting my current boyfriend.. They obviously weren't into me enough to want to continue with me and in fact, two of them disappeared. Even they told me clear things that would confuse even the best bull**** detector! They acted like they were smitten with me! One told me he was falling in love with me after a week or two and he had never felt that way before.... the other guy couldn't shut up about how amazing I was. It is hard enough to truly know what even the most seemingly "interested" guys are thinking. When a guy TELLS you that he doesn't want to get emotionally involved with you and treats you like a booty call, it should be very obvious what the guy is thinking. What will you do when a guy acts like he is really into you yet here are subtle signs he isn't? Try not to be one of "those girls" who clings onto ANY sign that a guy is into them. You really think there is more to this guy? Enough to write about?
Negative Nancy Posted February 18, 2014 Posted February 18, 2014 most men like this will come across a woman who will make them change all this.. they will just change the way the feel and the way they act. When a guy meets "that girl" that he really has a thing for, plenty of commitment averse men will simply fall too hard for certain girls to risk losing them; they may try and fail at having a commitment sort of arrangement with these girls. Exactly. Those are the men who string their exes along for years, telling them they "don't believe in marriage" (yeah, they only didn't believe in it with THEM), are "not ready for kids" (again, with THEM)....and then 6 months after the inevitable break-up, they marry their new woman within weeks and get her pregnant. They weren't "afraid" of commitment....they were just not interested in commitment with YOU. 2
TB Rhine Posted February 18, 2014 Posted February 18, 2014 I had a FWB last November. He fell head over heals in love with me. Whinebrag.
emva07 Posted February 18, 2014 Posted February 18, 2014 Updates! My friend who this guy kissed told me that he actually thinks I'm crazy. She also found out from his friend that he is the village idiot of his friend group and that he smooth talks his way into having girls sleep with him. Safe to say I'm done with him! I'm shocked you didn't see this before. The reason he said he didn't want to hurt your feelings is because after learning you were still a virgin he didn't want to be that guy who is pestered by a clingy girl because he took her virginity which from the way you talk about him, you would've been. He wants girls who are down to clown without nagging and without having to lie to them about caring about them to get in their pants. Either find good men or adapt to casual sex with no strings attached. You can't turn a ho into a househusband. lol.
Author emoore2013 Posted February 18, 2014 Author Posted February 18, 2014 Very good points made. I mean I know this happened at 2 am but he and I were talking for a while and he kept on insisting that he just wanted to talk, before I got emotional too. What made me think otherwise is the fact that he asked me if I had met any guys while I was away. Is there any truth to the claim that he was genuinely concerned about me?
emva07 Posted February 18, 2014 Posted February 18, 2014 (edited) my fwb care about each other...heck we use each other as references for jobs....we are FRIENDS. I hadn't talked to him since November and he wished me a happy birthday last night. It's like talking to any other friend. Are we screwing other ppl, yes....do we want to be with each other....no. Just because a guy just wants sex with you doesn't mean he can't care about you. I mean to be honest this guy isn't even pretending to care....saying he's concerned (just needed an excuse to not have contacted for so long and you bought it!), saying he wants to spend the night but shouldn't, these are all ways of convincing a reluctant girl to have sex. The fact that you're dwelling over it shows it worked to some extent. He will do one of two things here, keep pretending until you cave in, or he lost interest since he has others around. Whatever the case, you won't make him like you. Edit: and by caring I don't mean calling each other and going to the hospital if we are sick, or driving over to pick each other up if we are stranded somewhere, but more of a "how are you doing?" txt afterwards. Texting nonsense throughout the day. Edited February 18, 2014 by emva07 1
Leigh 87 Posted February 18, 2014 Posted February 18, 2014 Whinebrag. It's true. Men can fall head over heels for average looking girls like me.
gaius Posted February 18, 2014 Posted February 18, 2014 I hadn't talked to him since November and he wished me a happy birthday last night. Welcome back emva and happy birthday! Hope you had fun yesterday. Emoore, it sounds like he doesn't even really like or respect you. So likely the only thought in his head is "What can I do/say to get her to sleep with me again?" At least finding out he's the village idiot might dull some of the attraction you have for him. 1
KatZee Posted February 18, 2014 Posted February 18, 2014 Very good points made. I mean I know this happened at 2 am but he and I were talking for a while and he kept on insisting that he just wanted to talk, before I got emotional too. What made me think otherwise is the fact that he asked me if I had met any guys while I was away. Is there any truth to the claim that he was genuinely concerned about me? Genuinely concerned about you? Are you serious? You haven't talked to him in a year, he tried to get you to have sex with him and when you got emotional and showed him you couldn't handle no strings sex, he bailed and you haven't heard from him since. Not quite sure why you keep trying to analyze every. single. thing. this guy does and says. Who cares if he's the "village idiot" or whatever else people are saying. This wasn't an "update" this is stupid immature drama and gossip. He's obviously doing something right if he can talk his way into free sex from tons of chicks, and that he can make it into your bedroom after a year of not seeing you or giving a s.hit about you. No. He doesn't care about you. People that care about you don't run when you want a serious relationship. People that care about you don't ignore you for a year. People that care about you don't ignore you for a year and then try to get free p.ussy. People that care about you don't try to get free p.ussy and then bail, only to talk s.hit about you to your friends. Wake up here girl. This thread should have ended on page one. 1
Author emoore2013 Posted February 19, 2014 Author Posted February 19, 2014 Just to clarify, he didn't ignore me for a year. I was away from campus for a year. He did check up on me a couple times, but that doesn't mean anything in the grand scheme of things. I definitely deserve better than a village idiot who clearly doesn't respect that I'm a virgin among other things.
TB Rhine Posted February 19, 2014 Posted February 19, 2014 It's true. Men can fall head over heels for average looking girls like me. Gahhh!!! You won't goad me into complimenting you.
Author emoore2013 Posted February 25, 2014 Author Posted February 25, 2014 For those of you who don't know my situation the guy I used to hook up with contacted me on Valentines Day at 2 am just "to talk" after not speaking for quite some time. Things got emotional and ended on a bad note and he barely acknowledges me in person now. I just realized he met this girl and they are already exclusive after knowing each other for like less than two weeks (at least from what I can tell). Their entire relationship is legit all over Facebook and it's really annoying. Literally why would he want to see me the day before this all happened? Is it possible that he knew he was going to be dating this girl and he just wanted to use me one last time? Or is it something else? This is extremely frustrating and I'm considering deleting him off Facebook. What are your thoughts?
tlegend Posted February 25, 2014 Posted February 25, 2014 For those of you who don't know my situation the guy I used to hook up with contacted me on Valentines Day at 2 am just "to talk" after not speaking for quite some time. Things got emotional and ended on a bad note and he barely acknowledges me in person now. I just realized he met this girl and they are already exclusive after knowing each other for like less than two weeks (at least from what I can tell). Their entire relationship is legit all over Facebook and it's really annoying. Literally why would he want to see me the day before this all happened? Is it possible that he knew he was going to be dating this girl and he just wanted to use me one last time? Or is it something else? This is extremely frustrating and I'm considering deleting him off Facebook. What are your thoughts? It's possible he wanted to reconnect with you in hopes to find his bearing with you and where he stands with you. That way, he knows without a doubt if he can move on to someone else....or not. However, yes, it's possible he wanted to "use you" one more time. I doubt it though, especially because he contacted you and you said it got emotional. Care to enlighten us with what happened?
Author emoore2013 Posted February 25, 2014 Author Posted February 25, 2014 Yeah but he didn't want to be exclusive with me, and it seems like he almost is with this girl. He kissed me best friend (they didn't know each other) several weeks ago and then went weeks without talking to me. Then he texts me on Valentines day night. We caught up for a bit but he clearly wanted to go back to my place to continue "talking". We ended up in my bedroom and I remember he asked if I had met any guys along the way. Probably to see if I was still a virgin. We just made out that night but he realized I was fragile he said he wanted to leave. Keep in mind we were on and off hooking up for two years and none of it was public. I met a couple of his friends but none of it was public like his current fling is now.
Author emoore2013 Posted March 22, 2014 Author Posted March 22, 2014 My ex friend with benefits is ignoring me in public, at least this far. He told my friend he thought I was crazy so I texted him to let him know how I feel about it. No response. Obviously he's two faced because he reached out to me at 2 am on vday saying he was concerned about me. Anyway a month goes by and I see him out last night. I was a little tipsy so I told him he sucks while walking with my friend. He and the people he was with ignored it. I don't want to be malicious but the reason I'm so upset and said what I said was because he is completely fake and disrespectful (he was the first person I had sex with). What do you think he's thinking? He still looks at all of my snapchat stories (pictures and videos I take).
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