bubbaganoosh Posted April 12, 2014 Posted April 12, 2014 He then tells me about this girl he is now dating: He says 1) She is perfect See the above? Bet you a shiny red apple that he's going to be in for a real let down. Remember it was good old Uncle Bubbaganoosh who said it. 1
Soundsystem00 Posted April 12, 2014 Posted April 12, 2014 You said what you were going to say so brush it off and move on.
ichasemylife Posted April 12, 2014 Posted April 12, 2014 You are all correct. Im sorry its just hard. I thought he would be sorry but he isn’t. Instead he is cocky, and loves claiming his life is now perfect (now that im not there). I am moving on, just not emotionally. I did love this man very much. Everything that I wanted with him, all the frustrations of dealing with him being unemployed, being depressed, having to motivate him to want to improve his life. All these things he instantly now possesses within 3 months of meeting this new woman when I had to deal with 2am calls and rushing to his house because he was going to kill himself. Pulling him out of bed to go to work, watching him get fired over and over again. Losing jobs, losing friends. And the entire time I stood by him, getting him work, paying his bills, planning surprises, supporting him financially and emotionally to the point of near bankruptcy. I just don’t understand how someone can magically change. If he is happy im glad. I just don’t enjoy the gloating or pushing it on me. NC is best I need to heal. It’s just like she got the man I wanted all along and the life I wanted with him without dealing with any of the negatives I had to deal with over 2 years. He changed into this happy go lucky person and I was worrying over him for months, worried he wasnt ok. Wasting thoughts and agonising if he was dead or alive because of all the sucidal threats. And the whole time he is happy as can be... which im glad for. I just wasted my time. Sorry for the vent. There is always a period of time leading up to the break-up where at least one self-aware person in the relationship will notice that there is trouble in paradise. Whether it’s a short relationship or one spanning many years, there’s always a road to break-up. It can take a matter of hours or it can take months. If you’ve ever heard the term “the suspense is killing me,” then you’ll understand that this is the hardest part of any break-up.The key to the break-up is dignity. Being a pathetic, sobbing wretch is not going to win him back. Neither is being a furious, profanity-spewing juggernaut. Hold your head up, have respect for him and have respect for yourself. Be reasonable when you try to find out what you can do to save the relationship; you shouldn't give in to demands or options that you don’t want to live with. There have been several times I've offered to save the relationship by promising something I really wasn't comfortable with, but it doesn't fix the relationship; it simply shifts the awkwardness around. You might still be with him at the end of it, but at what cost? Do both of you a favor: remember your dignity. Move on ASAP ... This person had no real judgement capability.go for perfect NC ..cut all types of communications ... active or passive.Don’t pretend the relationship is over and start seeing other people. If you want to end it, end it. If they end it, it is over. Until then, you still have obligations.first heal your broken heart ... you need time and real space.. that's why go for perfect NC. when you feel you are ok ( it's only you know by instinct when it's your turn). Then find some one new who would value you what you are ! don't jump in a new relationship until you heal your broken heart. be kind yourself... go slow .. otherwise you may victim of Rebound Relationship (Which fails eventually ). Believe me he will come back when u wouldn't need him anymore and that's a real slap for him.Your life will go on. Things will get better. It will take a long time, in all likelihood, and it will take some work. Above everything else, remember your respect for the other person and your respect for yourself. Keep your head up high and roll with the punches. I suffer much,i had 2.9 years relationship with her.She cheated me two times. she had huge crush on me to marry her. i promised but i went go slow . coz i couldn't trust her ...and eventually she dumped me. i know i was her reboundee and vice versa. after contacting my ex .. active or passive . i wanted to be her best friend although .. i supported her every inconvenience.I thought she would be sorry but she wasn't. Instead she is loved claiming her life is now perfect. but very soon she needed a solder to cry on .. but it was for her new bf ... their relationship was straggling ... i know it's a rebound .. ( she’s with another guy immediately after the break up,i was start feeling like you really want her back. Don’t do that. This is your self-esteem trying to protect itself. Stop. Think about this: he is a parasite. An organism that can’t live alone and needs another for food, habitat, and support in order to survive. Do you really want to be with someone who just leeches off you and gives you nothing in return? Be happy that you’re parasite free and know that there are so many men who have whatever one redeeming quality your ex does, and many many more.) but i couldn't stay there anymore as a friend .. it was hurting me more and more .. Suddenly I'm back at the core ... i started love myself .. started perfect NC .. slowly i was regaining my real self-esteem and peace of mind ... after few months i started date with my another ex. She loved me perfectly about 9 years .. but we broke up mutually.. coz we come from different religion, in our country it's impossible to inter religion marriage. we tried to move on together for other country .. but we failed. now a days we are trying to move together for other country .. hope we would not fail again .. I am sorry for my bad English and best in luck for you Izzy8.
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