5105571 Posted April 4, 2014 Posted April 4, 2014 I've been dating a girl for about a month. When we started talking about 5 weeks ago we had a rhythm of communication. Recently, after we had sex, the rhythm is gone. Sometimes she'll respond, sometimes she won't. We'll be in the middle of a text conversation, then she'll just stop. I'll tell her to call me when she's free, and she won't. When she finally gets back to me a day later she acts like nothing happened. Normally I would shrug it off, but she didn't always act this way. We have met up a few times since she started doing this and everything seems fine in person. This has annoyed me so much that I did the following things-- -I kept following up with her until she responds. Not an annoying amount, but it gets to the point where I feel like I'm chasing her down and she doesn't care. I know her schedule. She's not that busy. -I've talked to her about it. I mentioned she was acting different and she said "no everything is good, if I needed space I'd tell you." I brought it up a second time and she said she was confused after we had sex. I asked how so and she couldn't answer. I agreed to take it down a notch and let her know my intentions to explore the relationship avenue. That conversation ended well and we've been out 3 times since then. -I give her time to respond, but this just goes back to the status quo. She slept over on Wednesday (no sex) and was supposed to get back to me about our next outing. She texted me yesterday about 5 messages, then stopped responding. I called once, and she has yet to get back to me since yesterday. My options now are to pick a fight with her over this or give her a taste of her own medicine and stop responding to her. I'm leaning towards the last one because it will show me if she's no longer interested or playing games. Confronting her did me no good the last two times anyways. I Personally think she's trying to keep things from moving faster on purpose because she doesn't want to rush this. My other option is to just drop her completely, but that won't solve the problem, just end my irritation
Eggplant Posted April 4, 2014 Posted April 4, 2014 Recently, after we had sex, the rhythm is gone.What happened was the sex utterly disrupted a delicate, flowering growth between the two of you. You were making good, slow, steady progress. Then the wrench happened. Sex so early pushes her to try to want you in a serious way, long before she's emotionally ready to feel that way about you. For some women, in order for sex to be an entirely enjoyable ordeal, they've got to have their emotions aligned and ready. Have sex before it's time, and the reaction is to pull back and recoil. If you want to progress with her, you need to give her plenty of space to get comfortable with you at her own pace. She probably isn't ready for sex again, particularly since she wasn't ready the first time, but she's afraid once you start, you have to keep going or break up. I say just be patient, and go slow. 1
Assasda Posted April 5, 2014 Posted April 5, 2014 Whats happening is you are needy, and instead of dropping you, she is showing you how needy you are, and is letting you know to stop it. So stop it Get your own life do your own thing, and stop projecting so much onto her
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