smithwilson Posted March 31, 2014 Posted March 31, 2014 my girlfriend and i have split up. we are still friends and are still going to be involved in each others life but we are no longer in a relationship she is 5 years younger and she is not ready to commit and its not fair to me that she might see other people. we are both allowed to see other people, and when she gets her issues settled out we will see what happens IF we get back together how do i handle that she has seen others? should i really pursue others though my heart lies with her
Strength in Healing Posted March 31, 2014 Posted March 31, 2014 Let me summarize what you're going to hear here, and what you need to do: STOP ALL CONTACT WITH HERDELETE ALL PICTURES OF HER AND REMOVE HER AS A FRIEND ON ANY SOCIAL MEDIADO NOT LOOK HER UP, DO NOT FOLLOW HER IN ANY WAYYou are NOT going to get back together, these situations don't have happy endings.Focus on yourself, go to the gym now, find new hobbies, surround yourself with FRIENDSHeal every single day, one day at a timeDON'T make the mistake of telling yourself YOUR situation is unique, and love will prevail here. 2
Author smithwilson Posted March 31, 2014 Author Posted March 31, 2014 Let me summarize what you're going to hear here, and what you need to do: STOP ALL CONTACT WITH HERDELETE ALL PICTURES OF HER AND REMOVE HER AS A FRIEND ON ANY SOCIAL MEDIADO NOT LOOK HER UP, DO NOT FOLLOW HER IN ANY WAYYou are NOT going to get back together, these situations don't have happy endings.Focus on yourself, go to the gym now, find new hobbies, surround yourself with FRIENDSHeal every single day, one day at a timeDON'T make the mistake of telling yourself YOUR situation is unique, and love will prevail here. oh come on you never know
Strength in Healing Posted March 31, 2014 Posted March 31, 2014 oh come on you never know I know I am coming off extremely negative, but in hindsight some time from now, you'll see I was trying to protect you despite not knowing you. If you listen to me, I will have helped you. If you disregard it, you will experience even more pain, but I wouldn't blame you for trying, I know I did before. 3
Weallwalkthelongroad Posted March 31, 2014 Posted March 31, 2014 Yup. This usually ends only one way. "Taking a break" is a bad sign.
sooshi Posted March 31, 2014 Posted March 31, 2014 You guys have split up. It's different from just taking a break. She is free to date anyone she wants, as you are. But you're not ready to do that yet, which is okay! It just happened. It would hurt you to know if she ends up seeing others, which is why I would suggest no contact. It will be hard, I'm sure, but it's there to protect you and to help you heal. You've said that she isn't ready to commit... do you truly want to be with someone who isn't ready/doesn't want to commit? I know that you're probably thinking of waiting it out and hoping that when she feels ready, that she'll come back to you. It's possible, although unlikely. Regardless, if she wants to reconcile eventually, she'll let you know. No contact is the best way to go, though. It's for you.
Chi townD Posted March 31, 2014 Posted March 31, 2014 Taking a break = Breaking up. Don't kid yourself. And yeah, she's going to be with other guys if she hasn't already. I mean, that's the main reason she broke up with you in the first place. Write her off, dude. Time to find a girl that wants to be with you because there's no other place in the world she would rather be. That girl is out there, and she waiting for you to find her. Your Ex isn't it. 1
elseaacych Posted March 31, 2014 Posted March 31, 2014 Let me summarize what you're going to hear here, and what you need to do: STOP ALL CONTACT WITH HERDELETE ALL PICTURES OF HER AND REMOVE HER AS A FRIEND ON ANY SOCIAL MEDIADO NOT LOOK HER UP, DO NOT FOLLOW HER IN ANY WAYYou are NOT going to get back together, these situations don't have happy endings.Focus on yourself, go to the gym now, find new hobbies, surround yourself with FRIENDSHeal every single day, one day at a timeDON'T make the mistake of telling yourself YOUR situation is unique, and love will prevail here. Taking care of yourself is the best thing to do in this situation. You can't lose if you take care of yourself, first. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/second-chances/84894-guide-second-chances Good advice for those who want to heal or get back together. LONG READ But really, the first one.
UltraTech Posted March 31, 2014 Posted March 31, 2014 my girlfriend and i have split up. we are still friends and are still going to be involved in each others life but we are no longer in a relationship she is 5 years younger and she is not ready to commit and its not fair to me that she might see other people. we are both allowed to see other people, and when she gets her issues settled out we will see what happens IF we get back together how do i handle that she has seen others? should i really pursue others though my heart lies with her Here is what she is saying. "I want to have sex with other men, likely multiple other men before I commit to anyone, so, i'm going to walk off and do me, but I just wanna keep you hanging by a thread for when I want you back, then, if I do want you back, we'll carry on as usual, but i probably wont want you back anyways". And to be really honest, do you really want a woman who split up with you to get ploughed by other men, then came back to you when these men were finished with her? I know you love/care about her, but she is not long term relationship material at the moment.
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