Author Mommame2 Posted April 4, 2014 Author Posted April 4, 2014 So tonight I went home on my dinner break and my son was having severe allergy attack. Eyes swollen shut. He has this happen once a year or so. Husband tells me to stop on way home to get Benadryl. I did. Son was okay. But scared. Before I left to go back to work he called me upstairs and asked me to sit with him. He said he was scared that I was leaving. I said you are going to be fine. You are already looking better! He said "you care for me more than Dad". Maybe that's typical? Kids wanting their moms? Or is that abnormal?
TAV Posted April 4, 2014 Posted April 4, 2014 So tonight I went home on my dinner break and my son was having severe allergy attack. Eyes swollen shut. He has this happen once a year or so. Husband tells me to stop on way home to get Benadryl. I did. Son was okay. But scared. Before I left to go back to work he called me upstairs and asked me to sit with him. He said he was scared that I was leaving. I said you are going to be fine. You are already looking better! He said "you care for me more than Dad". Maybe that's typical? Kids wanting their moms? Or is that abnormal? Did you reassure him that you would never leave him behind? Obviously your child is picking up on the tension between you and your husband and lives in fear of a divorce or other change. And in his mind this divorce is basically the end of the world. So try to tell him that you are always going to be there for him, no matter what. I told you before that children know right from wrong; he knows and feels who genuinely cares for him. Your husband's love seems to come with conditions. For you but also for your children.
Author Mommame2 Posted April 4, 2014 Author Posted April 4, 2014 Here's my problem. Going through this thread you might see how there are so many different issues/signals going on for me. Yesterday I had a very very frustrating day at work. It was very tough... Bosses yelling screaming etc. me getting thrown under the bus etc. I told my DH again that this pressure is just too much. Our son needs me too and I'm working literally 14 hour days when news breaks. Anyway ... He went from uncaring and unresponsive regarding the behavior explained previously here... To angry FOR me at my bosses. But not angry enough to help me be able to quit? He said their actions were driving HIM crazy FOR me. So I appreciated his support. Then he said he "forbids" me from working off the clock so to speak. I told him if I didn't, I wouldn't get all my work done. He said well that will teach them a lesson about how much they are invading your personal time. I told him I could get fired if I didn't make my deadlines. (He knows this) and he just said too bad ... They can't treat you like that and expect you to give up your unscheduled hours for their deadlines. Them he sent me this text: I love you very much. I am here to support you. I'm an ear to listen. A shoulder to cry on. A pair of arms to hug you. And a heart to love you through all of the seasons of change. When I came home for dinner I had the Benadryl for our son and he was just same ol angry person. I want to believe his support is genuine. My therapy is teaching my otherwise, though. What do you think?
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