Gingerlee Posted March 27, 2014 Posted March 27, 2014 Hello everyone! Been a long time since i've been on this forum. I'm going to cut to the chase. I signed up to POF and had a few dates. Some were good, some not so good. I was about to give up when I had a message from a guy. It was witty, sarcastic and had me in stitches so I replied. What luck, he was gorgeous too! We exhanged messages for a few days and I found myself really looking forward to reading our conversation. We moved it to FB where I could see that he was actually so much more gorgeous! We talked all day every day. Monday night we had our first "serious" conversation (it had always been just banter, sarcasm and stupidity until this point) and we stayed up till 4:30am talking. Tuesday we decided to meet in person. I wore a pencil skirt and a crop top with a leather jacket and met him in a busy place in town. I wasn't showing anything too revealing because he told me he'd never go for a slutty looking girl. After seeing him, we said hello and started walking. He was so good looking my heart skipped a beat. We went to a pub and he bought me a few drinks and we couldn't stop laughing. He told me I had beautiful eyes and before I knew it, four hours had passed and the pub was getting busy from people going clubbing and we had literally spent the entire time laughing together. He asked if I wanted to come back to his and I agreed, and he stopped off at a shop to buy me a bottle of wine to share. I offered to pay but he refused. The lady at the checkout smiled at us and he was being cheeky about me being ID'd and I said "Well at least i'm not an old fart!" And the woman laughed and said "Gosh I know love when I see it" And we just smiled at each other, it wasn't awkward or embarrassing at all, and he not once corrected her to tell her we weren't in a relationship. We went back to his and he introduced me to his room mate. We got chatting for a little while, turned out he had been telling his friend all about me and he already knew my name and what I looked like. We chatted about games for a bit but retreated back to his room where we put a tv show on and sat on the couch. An hour passed and we were still deep in conversation, he also said "Every date I have been on has been so boring, but then you come along and just change everything!" I smiled and we got a little closer and started cuddling. He also wanted to show me a new TV show and I said "Don't hate me because I haven't seen it!" And he said "I couldn't hate you" and grabbed my face and kissed me so hard I nearly fell off the couch. This turned into an intense hour long make out session. He never once touched me inappropriately, he was very gentle and passionate and didn't initiate anything further. It was the biggest test of my will-power to not sleep with him. He kept telling me I had the most beautiful eyes and how pretty I was. We talked a little bit about our sexual history, but it was mostly banter and we made jokes out of it. We just seemed to bounce off each-others sarcasm, and I've never met anyone whose humor is exactly the same as mine. It turns out we go to the same college too and he told me he had it on friday if he was going to go in. I said he could meet me if he wanted (I said it jokingly) and he said "maaaybe." A couple hours pass and it's getting late. Nothing more than kissing has happened, and we had been cuddling this whole time. If I moved, he'd grab my waist and pull me back into him. He told me he can't wait to show me all the tv shows I'm missing out on, and how he wants me to bring my PS3 games over and how he wants me to meet his other room mate. He started getting a little quiet at around 2:30am and I figured he was tired so called a taxi to get home. He walked me to the place where the taxi was and kissed me goodbye, twice. He then said "I'll see you... some when okay? I'll see you soon!" And waved goodbye. I realised I left my necklace at his but haven't mentioned it so far. So that was Tuesday night, and now it's Thursday evening and I haven't heard from him. The only way we can contact is through FB messenger as he recently sold his iphone and hasn't bought another one as of yet. His internet is also slightly dodgy, but it worked fine when I went over. He was online once yesterday but aside from that he hasn't been online at all, and hasn't seen the message. (or has chosen to ignore it and not click on it) I decided to keep it light and simply said "I'm home okay, the taxi driver was a nightmare. I blame you 100% you arse." (Obviously just joking around) And it still says he hasn't seen it yet. I really want to see him, and I know I'm being impatient, but it went so well I just get giddy thinking about him. I wanted to send a message asking to see him tonight (I work and go to college so free time is rare for me!) and joke about getting my necklace back but so far the few I have asked told me it was a bad idea and that he has to initiate contact first, so I haven't messaged him at all. This is the longest we haven't spoke in about three weeks. So, What do I do? When is it acceptable for me to send a message? Do I ask to see him or keep it in the manor we are accustomed too and just see where the conversation leads? I'm 20 and he's 22 if that helps anyone. Thanks for reading if any of you guys managed it all! I tried to keep it short but, obviously failed miserably haha. All help is appreciated!!
Sweetnothing Posted March 27, 2014 Posted March 27, 2014 I would just wait for him to get back to you. If he doesn't message you within a few more days move on. I'm always a bit skeptical with guys who are unbelievably gorgeous, witty, and too good to be true. Don't get me wrong, I hope this guy really likes you, but be on your guard. You might not be the only girl he's seeing. 7
Zahara Posted March 27, 2014 Posted March 27, 2014 I'd tread carefully. Guys that are highly charming off the blocks and good-looking, you should approach with caution. He is most likely dating other women as well. If you happen to go out again, keep the dates outside of the bedroom. Get to know him. Keep a balanced pace. I have a feeling Mr. Charming know he's good looking and knows he's a hot commodity. Let him come to you. 2
hasaquestion Posted March 27, 2014 Posted March 27, 2014 Hello everyone! Been a long time since i've been on this forum. I'm going to cut to the chase. I signed up to POF and had a few dates. Some were good, some not so good. I was about to give up when I had a message from a guy. It was witty, sarcastic and had me in stitches so I replied. What luck, he was gorgeous too! We exhanged messages for a few days and I found myself really looking forward to reading our conversation. We moved it to FB where I could see that he was actually so much more gorgeous! We talked all day every day. Monday night we had our first "serious" conversation (it had always been just banter, sarcasm and stupidity until this point) and we stayed up till 4:30am talking. Tuesday we decided to meet in person. I wore a pencil skirt and a crop top with a leather jacket and met him in a busy place in town. I wasn't showing anything too revealing because he told me he'd never go for a slutty looking girl. After seeing him, we said hello and started walking. He was so good looking my heart skipped a beat. We went to a pub and he bought me a few drinks and we couldn't stop laughing. He told me I had beautiful eyes and before I knew it, four hours had passed and the pub was getting busy from people going clubbing and we had literally spent the entire time laughing together. He asked if I wanted to come back to his and I agreed, and he stopped off at a shop to buy me a bottle of wine to share. I offered to pay but he refused. The lady at the checkout smiled at us and he was being cheeky about me being ID'd and I said "Well at least i'm not an old fart!" And the woman laughed and said "Gosh I know love when I see it" And we just smiled at each other, it wasn't awkward or embarrassing at all, and he not once corrected her to tell her we weren't in a relationship. We went back to his and he introduced me to his room mate. We got chatting for a little while, turned out he had been telling his friend all about me and he already knew my name and what I looked like. We chatted about games for a bit but retreated back to his room where we put a tv show on and sat on the couch. An hour passed and we were still deep in conversation, he also said "Every date I have been on has been so boring, but then you come along and just change everything!" I smiled and we got a little closer and started cuddling. He also wanted to show me a new TV show and I said "Don't hate me because I haven't seen it!" And he said "I couldn't hate you" and grabbed my face and kissed me so hard I nearly fell off the couch. This turned into an intense hour long make out session. He never once touched me inappropriately, he was very gentle and passionate and didn't initiate anything further. It was the biggest test of my will-power to not sleep with him. He kept telling me I had the most beautiful eyes and how pretty I was. We talked a little bit about our sexual history, but it was mostly banter and we made jokes out of it. We just seemed to bounce off each-others sarcasm, and I've never met anyone whose humor is exactly the same as mine. It turns out we go to the same college too and he told me he had it on friday if he was going to go in. I said he could meet me if he wanted (I said it jokingly) and he said "maaaybe." A couple hours pass and it's getting late. Nothing more than kissing has happened, and we had been cuddling this whole time. If I moved, he'd grab my waist and pull me back into him. He told me he can't wait to show me all the tv shows I'm missing out on, and how he wants me to bring my PS3 games over and how he wants me to meet his other room mate. He started getting a little quiet at around 2:30am and I figured he was tired so called a taxi to get home. He walked me to the place where the taxi was and kissed me goodbye, twice. He then said "I'll see you... some when okay? I'll see you soon!" And waved goodbye. I realised I left my necklace at his but haven't mentioned it so far. Dear men on this site THIS IS WHAT WOMEN LIKE Now stop making threads about it and take notes 3
Hello_is_it_me Posted March 27, 2014 Posted March 27, 2014 Dear men on this site THIS IS WHAT WOMEN LIKE Now stop making threads about it and take notes Good looking + witty + sarcastic + make a strong move but stay respectful = success with girl 2
Hello_is_it_me Posted March 27, 2014 Posted March 27, 2014 And to OP, if he doesn't respond within another couple days I guess he's not that interested or he's seeing a lot of different girls. I lol'd at the "your not like other girls..." line. It's such a great one and I've used it with MANY girls (don't judge me heh). Be wary 1
Zahara Posted March 27, 2014 Posted March 27, 2014 "Every date I have been on has been so boring, but then you come along and just change everything!" A dime for everytime I heard this. 2
Purepony Posted March 27, 2014 Posted March 27, 2014 I like him.. he's sounds like a good player.. everyone in this world has a phone but him hahaha 5
apetoape Posted March 27, 2014 Posted March 27, 2014 Lol loveshack really sucks with so many negative responders. He sounds genuine and inexperience. Get off this site right now and just play it cool. Don't listen to these people with ****ty experiences giving you advice LOL! Be natural, be yourself. Hes very interested in you. 1
Gaeta Posted March 27, 2014 Posted March 27, 2014 I remember when I started OLD and a men gave me compliments OMG!! I was swept away!! Now, when they give me compliments I think * yeah yeah yeah *YAWN*.
Hello_is_it_me Posted March 27, 2014 Posted March 27, 2014 Lol loveshack really sucks with so many negative responders. He sounds genuine and inexperience. Get off this site right now and just play it cool. Don't listen to these people with ****ty experiences giving you advice LOL! Be natural, be yourself. Hes very interested in you. When you're interested in someone do you not reply to their messages for days as well? 2
Zahara Posted March 27, 2014 Posted March 27, 2014 Hes very interested in you. So interested that he never even checked to see if she got home safe at 2:30AM. Instead she had to let him know. So interested that he hasn't even opened her message. So interested that she hasn't heard from him in two days. So interested that when she said they're in the same school and they could meet, he avoided it like the plague. In all my years I have been doing this all wrong! 9
soccerrprp Posted March 27, 2014 Posted March 27, 2014 When you're interested in someone do you not reply to their messages for days as well? OP, WAIT FOR HIM TO COME TO YOU! It doesn't make ANY sense for him to have ignored your email. Hasn't even opened it???? He either didn't notice or he's playing some kind of game.
apetoape Posted March 27, 2014 Posted March 27, 2014 Lol in his mind she is dating 100 other guys even if its not true. He's trying to come off not looking desperate. Neither person know who's playing who and neither wants to look desperate thus forced into playing the game. This is online dating Guys are not complicated. Stop listening to these people trying to turn your fears and insecurities into something bigger than it is
soccerrprp Posted March 27, 2014 Posted March 27, 2014 Lol in his mind she is dating 100 other guys even if its not true. He's trying to come off not looking desperate. Neither person know who's playing who and neither wants to look desperate thus forced into playing the game. This is online dating Guys are not complicated. Stop listening to these people trying to turn your fears and insecurities into something bigger than it is Ha ha...you tell the OP to ignore other poster's suggestions, ideas about insecurities and fears, but tell her that he's playing a game.....tell me, should she ignore you too? Playing games is acceptable? 1
Hello_is_it_me Posted March 27, 2014 Posted March 27, 2014 Lol in his mind she is dating 100 other guys even if its not true. He's trying to come off not looking desperate. Neither person know who's playing who and neither wants to look desperate thus forced into playing the game. This is online dating Guys are not complicated. Stop listening to these people trying to turn your fears and insecurities into something bigger than it is Yeah I guess if they both like each other they should just both keep ignoring each other. Maybe ignore one another for a year because they are just super-interested! 1
Phantom888 Posted March 27, 2014 Posted March 27, 2014 Be careful with this one. As stated, stay out of his bedroom. This guy is charming the hell out of you, and can make you think about him even though he has been 2 days MISSING!!! He's dating other women, and by now he is probably spending more time with someone else he is more interested in. If he contacts you in a few days and gives you some lame excuse like "sorry I've been super busy......" that means he is putting the other girl on hold to explore you. Don't sleep with this guy... he is a player, and his ways are the oldest tricks in the book. 5
apetoape Posted March 27, 2014 Posted March 27, 2014 (edited) Lol no one is telling her to ignore him. Playing it cool doesn't mean ignore. They're both young, and she's an in demand 20 year old girl. Hes interested in her if he went that far dam The estrogen and bitterness level in this thread is out of control. If you see this message OP leave this thread and follow your instinct. You can use the life experience Edited March 27, 2014 by apetoape
Zahara Posted March 27, 2014 Posted March 27, 2014 Hes interested in her if he went that far dam They went on a date and he took her back to his place. That's about it. Doesn't seem like he went very far.
Hello_is_it_me Posted March 27, 2014 Posted March 27, 2014 Lol no one is telling her to ignore him. Playing it cool doesn't mean ignore. They're both young, and she's an in demand 20 year old girl. Hes interested in her if he went that far dam The estrogen and bitterness level in this thread is out of control No one said to dump the guy. They just said "be careful." Because OP should! And your perspective is bizarre to me. If I date a girl who I assume is dating tons of guys (based upon no evidence) I should ignore her because I like her..? Faulty logic in my view. The guy either: Is not into her (not good) Is playing a NC waiting game to make her miss him (rude) Dating other girls and is too busy to care (not good)
apetoape Posted March 27, 2014 Posted March 27, 2014 No one said to dump the guy. They just said "be careful." Because OP should! And your perspective is bizarre to me. If I date a girl who I assume is dating tons of guys (based upon no evidence) I should ignore her because I like her..? Faulty logic in my view. The guy either: Is not into her (not good) Is playing a NC waiting game to make her miss him (rude) Dating other girls and is too busy to care (not good) Huh based on no evidence? Think man. She's 20 on an online dating site. Her mailbox will be constantly full. His on the other hand will have like 3 messages if he's lucky. He will try to play hard to get (which is apparently working) to make her think he's a catch and has options as well. Unlike the tons of losers who spam her offering her anything she wants.
Author Gingerlee Posted March 27, 2014 Author Posted March 27, 2014 I didn't mean to evoke such a reaction! Thankyou all for responding though, I have taken the time to read every one of them. Can I just mention that this guy is super quirky? He does illustration, he lives with equally quirky housemates and didn't used to be attractive and finds it strange when people say he is. We talked about all this and he told me straight up that he would tell me straight away if he didn't want to pursue anything as he's had it happen to him, and same with me. I know his internet is a bit crap, and it says he hasn't actually logged on to facebook in over 24 hours, so I'm not really sure what to think. Maybe I am being naive! How do I go about getting my necklace back, it's a favorite!
Marks Posted March 27, 2014 Posted March 27, 2014 I know his internet is a bit crap, and it says he hasn't actually logged on to facebook in over 24 hours, so I'm not really sure what to think. Wait, since when did Facebook show when someone logged in? 2
Gaeta Posted March 27, 2014 Posted March 27, 2014 We talked about all this and he told me straight up that he would tell me straight away if he didn't want to pursue anything as he's had it happen to him, and same with me. You don't know him, he can say anything he wants to get the evening going. 1
starrynightz45 Posted March 27, 2014 Posted March 27, 2014 For me, when a guy invites me to his place after a 1st date, it's a huge, HUGE bummer. Even if it was a great date. Things just plummet for me and I re-evaluate the whole night. I'd be cautious with this guy. Every woman appreciates a guy who can read that you're interested and then leans in to give you a big, strong kiss. But...I question intentions when a man invites me over too early. Beware. 5
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