I'm thinking about shutting down my OKC profile.

[hurts_so_bad]

Most girls want the hard to get badboy & that's the truth. Only a very very small percentage of girls like a nice decent man. A very very tiny percentage of them & there's nothing us good guys can do about it u know. I accept it as something that cant be changed just like a very tiny percentage of men will take an unpretty girl. It works on both sides I guess .

 

I agree with you on this but disagree as well...The part about accepting this as something that cant be changed.. People adapt and I believe you have to adapt in order to get what you want..otherwise accepting it as it is gets you NOTHING! I believe that life is a game and in order to win you sometimes have to change strategies..

 

They want the bad boy so then give them what they want! Im not a bad boy but very well can be if its the right person..I consider myself a good guy.. A good guy is inbetween nice guy who gets **** all over and the badboy..A good guy will treat people right but not take **** either!

 

To get what you want you have to adapt or you just sit around saying life sucks! Accepting it doesnt make it any better..Changing it does!

[hurts_so_bad]

"With all that said its still rough! These dating sites are rough and I personally think it has ruined the dating world! I describe them as a supermarket! There is always a better deal on isle two! Thats exactly how people are thinking these days too! Always looking for the bigger better deal and thats exactly why you see so many beautiful women on these sites for so long..

 

Many of them are looking for the ultimate male! lol...Good looks, money, personality, knows karate, owns a mansion, need I go on? Thats exactly why many of them will continue to be on the sites lonely as well.."

 

 

Very true! Dating these days is a MESS! If I had a dollar for every time someone asked me why I was single and what am I waiting for...I'd never have to work again. But NO, women aren't looking for that perfect guy. Hell I'm just looking for a good guy. I've dated not so cute guys, awkward guys, poor guys basically guys the total opposite of perfect because all I wanted was a good guy. But even these guys were so obsessed with the grass is greener mentality that they eventually went poof. Dating online you try to start a relationship but he's still on trying to get someone "better" you wonder how anyone got a relationship started online. So don't just blame women its society in general and OLDing has made things worse it's great if that's your only way of getting a date, at least you have a chance, but there's so many pitfalls to it.

 

Oh I am not blaming women only..I just spoke that way because I am a guy..Its most people online I think..Im probably one of the few just looking to meet the right one and end all this BS..Bottom line is that I am not going to settle! Im not looking for perfect but perfect for me whatever that is! Problem is you have so many people that settle just not to be alone and sooner or later it comes back to bite the poor soles ass on the other end of the relationship who didnt settle and thought they had something special with someone who they never knew didnt care all that much in the first place..

 

Thats one reason why I would never chase anyone! Not that Im a tough guy but because I know its not the right thing to do..If someone wants to be with you they will be without the need for your chasing..Ive seen it so many times with guys who chased women when they were younger and had failed realtionships or divorces or a wife that has no respect for them..

 

Reason is many times when a person chases another long enough, There are times the other person hits a low and finally says hey you know what "joe" is such a good guy and he really likes me! I know he will be a good provider and a good man..So what happens? They get together but years down the road it ends..Reason is because the other person settled and was never happy with the other person in the first place..They settled for less then what they wanted and gave a person they were never truely in love with false hope all because they were afraid to be alone and settled

[iiiii]

It's just how online dating works, in my experience.

 

Decent looking women get huge numbers of messages so only respond to the most interesting/friendly/good looking profiles (often the guys who would be well out of their league in real life).

 

Decent looking guys message decent looking women (or even women who would be well out of their league IRL) then complain that they don't get any responses.

 

And ugly women (or women who don't post photos) get hardly any messages from anyone at all.

 

If you're after an actual partner (not just a ONS) then IMO it's far better to try to meet women in real life.

[drew232]

Ultimately, you have to have patience. You may find yourself without receiving messages every once in a while, and that's fine...because what you're ultimate goal is to let the women come to you. How do you do that? Get the ones who like you to like your profile. Then once they like your profile, you're almost guaranteed to get a response when you message them. Why else would they like your profile?

 

Attractive girls generally don't have to like profiles..they let the guys come to them. Unless it's Tinder the guy is going to need to make the first move.

 

Even if you do have an amazing profile it just comes across like you're putting in too much effort. I'm generally interested in a girl's personality but if she wrote a book about herself 1) I'm not going to read it all 2) Anyone who spends too much time on their OKC account--> turnoff.

 

It's all about 1) pictures 2) the messages you're sending..and lastly 3) the wording of your profile.

 

So yes it's important to have good grammar and punctuation but don't write an essay and don't put too much effort into it!

 

Or at least that's been my experience.

[Standard-Fare]

I'd like to add a woman's perspective here, too. Online dating isn't some cake-walk for us where we get to sift through a billion appealing messages and pick the best options.

 

As a woman, 90 percent of the messages you get are from guys who are blatantly ignoring the dealbreakers you've outlined (i.e. outside of the age range you set, live more than 50 miles from you, whatever.) And most of them are form letters from a guy who's clearly sending off 20 at a time. And a lot of them are creepy or offensive.

 

Recently I've put something generic as my main profile photo so people have to dig a little deeper, and I've taken to sending direct messages to guys I'm interested in. But my success rate isn't super. I'm not bad-looking, but I'm not "hot," and I'm also in my 30s when a lot of the fools my age think they want a 23-year-old.

 

Online dating is a lot like real life in that the old rule of "you don't want to be a part of a club that will have you as a member" applies. The people who actually seek you out, you're naturally wary of and think you can do better. But then the ones YOU seek out apply that same mentality to you.

 

Good times!

[Tayken]

I think most woman at any age are horrible at conversations..they give one or two word answers and expect you to do all the work. I drop these girls fairly quickly.

 

I feel like you're under the impression that I sext? I've never sent a dick pic ever..I only joke about sending them sometimes because I know how dumb they are haha

 

I can confirm that most women are indeed horrible at holding a convo. I have had to drop 3 of them this week alone. It's there in my profile that I am not one for one liners, yet I get just that and them saying to me....."tell me about yourself"...did you even read my profile?

 

I have 2 FWB currently bombarding me with texts and being clingy.....such a red flag I tell ya