Eggshells Posted March 22, 2014 Posted March 22, 2014 It's been 3 years strong of NC. Last night I wrote to him. I am not sure he will get my message though. Since I had no way to contact him I did it through a social network I don't think he uses anymore. I still feel like a sucker but I'm not going to be too hard on myself... it was a relapse and maybe it means I need to change the way I've been doing things instead of just ignoring what's going inside of me. I don't expect a reply from him. He only tried to get in touch with me once and nothing happened. We live far away from each other so physical contact is impossible. I have no idea of whats going on with his life and I think that's whats been eating at me. I tried thinking that he's in a beautiful relationship now and that me getting in touch will only make me look pitiful and like a pest. At this point I don't care anymore.. I need to heal myself and I feel isn't going to happen until I get some closure. I feel like a zombie going through life without feeling too much. The worst part isn't about me or him. The worst part is that I have a bf (2yr relationship) that is wonderful and I did this.
SerCay Posted March 22, 2014 Posted March 22, 2014 OP Why in heaven's name did you get in a new relationship without getting over your old? Looks like you delayed your healing process. I think it's unfair to your current bf and to yourself. You should first properly heal and when the time is right, your body and mind will let you know you are ready for new love. Best of luck
BC1980 Posted March 22, 2014 Posted March 22, 2014 This might be a case of idealizing the past in some way. How do you feel about your current boyfriend? Would you leave him for your ex?
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