Tind Posted March 21, 2014 Posted March 21, 2014 I had a 'friend', we were both very close in our teenage years. We respected eachother. We would often say I love you, plan things together, check up on eachother throughout the day. I was slightly obsessive perhaps:bunny:. Up until recently, it was the case we would both get upset when not talking to one another, but lately, my 'friend' seems to be uninterested in my presence, and I feel is now making excuses to get away from me whenever we contact or meet eachother. There's something on TV, or too ill to talk and so on. It's become the case I feel as though my friend is instantly bored whenever I appear and doesn't mind if we don't talk for days, whereas I can't breathe without some sort of contact. I'm feeling like a substitute, I wish I could move on. How do I get this person to love me again, like they used to? or if that is not possible ... How do I forget about this person ??
AlwaysGrowing Posted March 22, 2014 Posted March 22, 2014 I find that there are people who need others to validate their life and those that don't. I rarely feel lonely when I am alone. I actually need alone time, to nourish myself. I am happy with me and know how to self soothe/entertain/work on issues myself. I find needy people exhausting. They probably find me aloof at times. It is not so much that I don't care at all, it is the constant caring about them that I don't have patience for. In my life, for self preservation, I have had to cut them out of my life. The relationship always seemed to end up....me defending my right to my own life without getting permission from them first. I do not want to have a friendship where I need to report my every move, everyday. Nowadays, I spot these people early, and never forge a relationship beyond acquaintance. What do you think it means, when someone says they want to watch TV or are ill? Do you take things too personal? If you do, why? 1
Author Tind Posted March 24, 2014 Author Posted March 24, 2014 Hi, Thanks for the reply! Well I do understand I am rather clingy, however, my friend was too- in the past. Unlike most people, including yourself, I loved it, this was a mutual feeling and we behaved similarly to one another. I love my friend, this is why I have behaved in what could only be described as a clingy type of way. I KNOW she felt the same, but with this sudden change, I now believe something has happened. Perhaps she just woke up and decided she didn't like me anymore -who knows. I'd love to know how I could regain that same mutual need for eachother. If it is possible. You ask what I think it means when my friend says they're too ill to talk, or something more interesting is happening, like tv. I feel these are excuses to get away from me. I want our past chemistry back again.
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