blossomingholy Posted March 21, 2014 Posted March 21, 2014 (edited) Hi, I have a question and I am not sure where to turn in my life for help and advice. I have been in a relationship with a younger man, he is 29 now, I'm 34 for a bit over 7 years. We have two children. 6 and 3. I parent them full time and due to me not wanting to live on the road anymore, as he does remote work and lives in caravan parks, i decided to get a home where i was closer to family and also a good and vibrant homeschooling community. For a number of years, since our first child was born but more accentuated since our second, I have stopped being sexually attracted to him. I love him, and want to support him and see him flourish in the world but I just do not get aroused. I know I am an extremely loving and sexual woman, and i often find myself turned on by other men, just by looking at them. I know my libido is not dead, I have really good hormonal levels too. It breaks my heart that I haven't got the juice for him, He is beautiful. I do try everything to get juicy and turned on with him, but it just doesn't happen. It was deeply affecting his self esteem. Last year, I gave him my blessing to have sex with other women. He had a fabulous time, great sex, and realised what I have been telling him, which is, you are amazing, you are worthy, you are perfect as you are. He stopped doing it, because of his love for me, and he decided he wanted deep intimacy with me. The devastating thing for me is I recoil at his advances, his kisses. I am not excited by his manhood, his beautiful body, in fact I don't want his penis inside me at all. Heartbreaking. It is as if my body is screaming "NO". I am in no way afraid of intimate communication, in fact I find it easy to face my fears and speak my heart. This situation though has me baffled. <sigh> Edited March 21, 2014 by blossomingholy add in some words.
TAV Posted March 21, 2014 Posted March 21, 2014 Has he disappointed you in any way, non-sexual I mean? Even just once but devastatingly so? Maybe something you think it is long gone and buried? Did you have sex with others too? And did you enjoy it?
stillafool Posted March 21, 2014 Posted March 21, 2014 Why not just let him go and be free to date other men? He will be hurt but will get over it and find a woman who will love him the way he deserves to be loved.
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