HeavenOrHell Posted March 13, 2014 Posted March 13, 2014 I think it's really nice leaving stuff at each other's place, it's a reminder of each other and of the fact you'll be back to visit, so I think your comment is a bit off tbh. ...were you trying to mark your territory in his home?
HeavenOrHell Posted March 13, 2014 Posted March 13, 2014 Sorry this happened, he's behaved pretty badly from what you've said, but I can't help thinking you only want the things back as a way of getting back at him, I mean if you can't even use the microwave yourself anyway. It's understandable, but I'd have some respect for yourself and leave it. I would not care that much if those were cheap items but I mean I am talking about a super nintendo, an xbox and what I really want back would be the hello kitty microwave. I paid like 120 dollars for that. I would not be able to use it since we have different outlets here but it is my stuff that I bought with my own money so I dont want him to keep those things from me. 3
TAV Posted March 13, 2014 Posted March 13, 2014 I guess it's a cultural thing. You accepted the one line without batting an eyelid, you had a very civil reaction. I'm quite sure girls from other (hotter) European countries would not have had such a civil reaction. That's all. Errr... Some Northern European girls would have a more passionate/fiery reaction. Just like some Southern European girls would be just as civil. Generalisation is never a good thing. 3
justwhoiam Posted March 14, 2014 Posted March 14, 2014 Errr... Some Northern European girls would have a more passionate/fiery reaction. Just like some Southern European girls would be just as civil. Generalisation is never a good thing. And politically correct at all costs sucks at times.
Author Cheerbabe93 Posted March 17, 2014 Author Posted March 17, 2014 So I texted him last night. It was the first time we talked after 23 days of NC. My plan was to simply ask him for my stuff back but we ended up talking for a bit. It was sooo weird. I can post the convo if anyone is interested
ThisGal Posted March 19, 2014 Posted March 19, 2014 (edited) So I texted him last night. It was the first time we talked after 23 days of NC. My plan was to simply ask him for my stuff back but we ended up talking for a bit. It was sooo weird. I can post the convo if anyone is interested Why continue to allow yourself to be taken advantage of?? He used you for sex, the stuff you bought and you ended up with absolutely nothing in return but wasted time. This guy was obviously never really that interested in you. He took, took and took. You gave, gave and gave.... Any man who really cares about his woman would not like his woman paying for everything, he would certainly help pay! Especially since your visits were benefiting him as well. You were like a package being shipped to him without him worrying about the method of shipment or paying for package. And he led you on to believe there was a real commitment by stringing you along with a promise of a ring. You fell for it. Move on girl What you spoke to him about is pretty meaningless when he had the audacity to break up with you disrespectfully the way he did then ignores you for almost a month like you meant nothing. Put him in the back burner. Move on with your life. Have more respect for yourself next time. Take this as a lesson learned. The end. Edited March 19, 2014 by ThisGal 3
ladyrunner21 Posted March 22, 2014 Posted March 22, 2014 So I texted him last night. It was the first time we talked after 23 days of NC. My plan was to simply ask him for my stuff back but we ended up talking for a bit. It was sooo weird. I can post the convo if anyone is interested Did he apologize for being a complete jerk? I'd be interested in the conversation if for no other reason than to see if he tried to justify his actions. So yes, as a student of human nature, I'm interested in reading the convo.
soccerrprp Posted March 22, 2014 Posted March 22, 2014 So I texted him last night. It was the first time we talked after 23 days of NC. My plan was to simply ask him for my stuff back but we ended up talking for a bit. It was sooo weird. I can post the convo if anyone is interested AAAAAAARGH! Why did you talk about anything else but getting your stuff back??????!!!!! He's a manipulator and got you off-task by talking about other things that you have no business talking about. I really hope you didn't talk about the whys and hows and other dribble....ugh.
Author Cheerbabe93 Posted March 23, 2014 Author Posted March 23, 2014 AAAAAAARGH! Why did you talk about anything else but getting your stuff back??????!!!!! He's a manipulator and got you off-task by talking about other things that you have no business talking about. I really hope you didn't talk about the whys and hows and other dribble....ugh. i know, i feel so ****ty now. he told me he is coming back to germany soon and that he misses me and thinks about me all the time. i regret breaking nc soooo much.
carhill Posted March 23, 2014 Posted March 23, 2014 Cool, he can bring your stuff with him. Problem solved! 4
Author Cheerbabe93 Posted March 23, 2014 Author Posted March 23, 2014 Did he apologize for being a complete jerk? I'd be interested in the conversation if for no other reason than to see if he tried to justify his actions. So yes, as a student of human nature, I'm interested in reading the convo. march 23rd me: can you do me a favor? him: hi him: guess what? me: what? him: prolly com in back to germany real soon him: and guess what else me: back to ramstein? him: yup him: miss me? me: i miss trevor (our puppy that lives with him) him: lol i think he might miss u too me: so youre getting stationed here again? or did you just mean your little stop before your deployment? him: stationed him: and guess what else? me: what? him: i didnt replace you, silly me: yes you did. you told ashley (my best friend) about her and then talked **** about me him: nope but if thats what you need to think thats fine me: what do you mean "need to think"? him: never mind what were you gonna ask me me: i was gonna ask if i could have my stuff back him: what stuff me: i can make a list if you want him: ok maybe ill give it to you in person me: ok i actually miss you him: aww miss you too me: i was watching batman today and it kinda made me think of you. remember when we watched it together and i fell asleep after like a few minutes? him: aww him: yea lol him: i think about you all the time me: did you ever get my vday package? him: yes me: oh i wasnt sure if you got it him: how are you doing? me: like right now or in general? him: now me: im a mess him: like a hot mess? me: yup me: i feel like its been forever since we saw each other him: yea too long me: i think this is the longest weve gone without seeing each other him: yeah me too march 24th me: was this conversation like some sort of joke? him: what do you mean me: if the things you said were meant as a joke him: no wasnt joking him: why would you think theyre a joke me: cause i didnt think youd miss me him: wtf me: ? him: ugh never mind me: well this escalated quickly him: lol march 25th him: to tell you the truth, i very much so like being single and tho there is someone else i have feelings for, im not looking for a relationship with her or anyone. i miss you and there is a good chance i will be back in germany soon. but i think theres some def things that keep me from wanting to be serious with you. one of them is how you reacted to your friend talking to me as if you didnt trust either of us and it just made for a weird situation that didnt have to go down like that. thats one big reason i gotta move on and so should u. i dont wanna cut u out completely. im still very attracted to you and maybe we can have a future but i think we both got some things to take care of before that should happen. so if you want to stay in contact it will only be as friends for now.
soccerrprp Posted March 23, 2014 Posted March 23, 2014 that was a dreadful exchange of text. he reeled you in with hopeful banter and you swallowed the bait. he is only interested b/c he may be coming back there. he's not coming back for YOU. whatever the reason, he's coming back and the first person he thinks of is you b/c he knows he has some control over you. get him to bring your things with you and be done with him. 3
Survivor12 Posted March 23, 2014 Posted March 23, 2014 i know, i feel so ****ty now. he told me he is coming back to germany soon and that he misses me and thinks about me all the time. i regret breaking nc soooo much. Did you not READ what he wrote yesterday????? He told you that there is someone else (after leading you to believe that you "hadn't been replaced")!!! He told you that he doesn't want a relationship with you.... After reading that message, how can you possibly focus on the BS he fed you before??? He was LYING! You were BEING PLAYED!!! Get your head out of the sand & face reality. You contacted him and let your emotions run your mouth. You gave him the green flag to play with you like a cat plays with a mouse. Denial may work for you now, but you're just postponing your misery. Seriously, get a grip! From this point forward, he is no longer to blame for treating you like garbage. He's told you that he doesn't want a relationship with you so it's your own fault if you choose not to listen. 1
Author Cheerbabe93 Posted March 24, 2014 Author Posted March 24, 2014 Did you not READ what he wrote yesterday????? He told you that there is someone else (after leading you to believe that you "hadn't been replaced")!!! He told you that he doesn't want a relationship with you.... After reading that message, how can you possibly focus on the BS he fed you before??? He was LYING! You were BEING PLAYED!!! Get your head out of the sand & face reality. You contacted him and let your emotions run your mouth. You gave him the green flag to play with you like a cat plays with a mouse. Denial may work for you now, but you're just postponing your misery. Seriously, get a grip! From this point forward, he is no longer to blame for treating you like garbage. He's told you that he doesn't want a relationship with you so it's your own fault if you choose not to listen. I know that. I shouldn't have been that nice to him but I got weak because for a little moment it felt as if we were still ok. It was a mistake. I know. So I'm back to NC but I kind of wanna text him one last time and just tell him that I don't wanna be his friend that he can **** off and that he's an ass. Would that be a good idea? Or should I just not talk to him anymore?
justwhoiam Posted March 24, 2014 Posted March 24, 2014 Yeah, so basically, you're good to have sex with while he's there, should you feel like it. But nothing serious. No gf/bf. If you really want your stuff back, email him the list of things you want back and then give him your friend's (Ashley) phone number, so that they can meet up and she gets the stuff. Warn her about this. Don't meet him.
Author Cheerbabe93 Posted March 24, 2014 Author Posted March 24, 2014 Yeah, so basically, you're good to have sex with while he's there, should you feel like it. But nothing serious. No gf/bf. If you really want your stuff back, email him the list of things you want back and then give him your friend's (Ashley) phone number, so that they can meet up and she gets the stuff. Warn her about this. Don't meet him. He has her number but she lives in CA and he lives in CO so that's not gonna work. I went back to NC but do you think it would be a good idea to text him one last time and to tell him that he can't treat me like that and that he's an ass and to **** off? Or should I just not talk to him anymore ?
justwhoiam Posted March 24, 2014 Posted March 24, 2014 He has her number but she lives in CA and he lives in CO so that's not gonna work. Ok. Then only email him your list if you have a friend where you live who can meet him and do you the favor. I went back to NC but do you think it would be a good idea to text him one last time NO. to tell him that he can't treat me like that and that he's an ass and to **** off? That would be just for you to vent. Just ignore him. Or should I just not talk to him anymore ? Right. Keep NC. Be strong. If he texts, calls, messages you, don't be tempted to answer. Call a friend, read a book, go out for a walk, start cooking, watch tv, etc. But do not answer.
Author Cheerbabe93 Posted March 24, 2014 Author Posted March 24, 2014 Ok. Then only email him your list if you have a friend where you live who can meet him and do you the favor. NO. That would be just for you to vent. Just ignore him. Right. Keep NC. Be strong. If he texts, calls, messages you, don't be tempted to answer. Call a friend, read a book, go out for a walk, start cooking, watch tv, etc. But do not answer. I live in Europe so I can't just get my stuff lol Anyways I don't care about it anymore but if I just continue NC isn't he gonna think it's ok for me to treat me like ****? I want him to know that I'm done and not waiting for him. That's why I thought maybe texting him one last time and telling him what I really think would be good to show him that I'm done?
TMichaels Posted March 24, 2014 Posted March 24, 2014 I want him to know that I'm done and not waiting for him. Fine then text him this: "You're right, both of us need to move on. I'll not be contacting you again. Please do me the courtesy of doing the same." Then DELETE the guy from any social media or messenger sites and block his number on your phone so you're not tempted to give this loser his umpteenth chance at playing you like a fool. Best, TMichaels
CarrieT Posted March 24, 2014 Posted March 24, 2014 I live in Europe so I can't just get my stuff lol Anyways I don't care about it anymore GOOD! I'm glad you got to a point about not caring about your stuff and I'm disappointed in you that after two pages of this thread trying to convince you to forget about your stuff, you still contacted him. Look at how THAT went for you! but if I just continue NC isn't he gonna think it's ok for me to treat me like ****? He already does! Re-engaging him is not going to change how he treats you. If anything, he will continue to walk all over you. What others have suggested: Go NC and DELETE his number. Do not acknowledge him ever again. E.V.E.R. That's why I thought maybe texting him one last time and telling him what I really think would be good to show him that I'm done? NC is a stronger message that you are done than anything you can say. Believe us! He will get it when you do not answer any of his messages. Block him! Sheesh - he really took you for a ride with those follow-up texts and you should just walk away. Forget about your stuff (like we told you earlier) and chalk this up to a huge life-learning lesson. Hopefully you won't go down this particular road again. 1
Author Cheerbabe93 Posted March 24, 2014 Author Posted March 24, 2014 GOOD! I'm glad you got to a point about not caring about your stuff and I'm disappointed in you that after two pages of this thread trying to convince you to forget about your stuff, you still contacted him. Look at how THAT went for you! He already does! Re-engaging him is not going to change how he treats you. If anything, he will continue to walk all over you. What others have suggested: Go NC and DELETE his number. Do not acknowledge him ever again. E.V.E.R. NC is a stronger message that you are done than anything you can say. Believe us! He will get it when you do not answer any of his messages. Block him! Sheesh - he really took you for a ride with those follow-up texts and you should just walk away. Forget about your stuff (like we told you earlier) and chalk this up to a huge life-learning lesson. Hopefully you won't go down this particular road again. I bet he won't even notice that I'm doing NC cause the last time I didn't talk to him for 23 days and he didn't seem to give a ****. So I don't even think he will notice. Anyways I have a key to his apartment, I paid for it but I mean I don't need it anymore do you think I should mail him the key and like a note saying something like "no longer need this, maybe your new chick wants it" or should I just throw it away?
CarrieT Posted March 24, 2014 Posted March 24, 2014 Anyways I have a key to his apartment, I paid for it but I mean I don't need it anymore do you think I should mail him the key and like a note saying something like "no longer need this, maybe your new chick wants it" or should I just throw it away? Throw it away. Why spend money on postage for this loser? Why give him any consideration at all? 1
Author Cheerbabe93 Posted March 24, 2014 Author Posted March 24, 2014 Throw it away. Why spend money on postage for this loser? Why give him any consideration at all? Because I thought it might make him upset or it might show him that I am done with that chaper.
CarrieT Posted March 24, 2014 Posted March 24, 2014 Because I thought it might make him upset or it might show him that I am done with that chaper. Again - WHY DO YOU CARE what he thinks!?!?! 2
Author Cheerbabe93 Posted March 24, 2014 Author Posted March 24, 2014 Again - WHY DO YOU CARE what he thinks!?!?! It's not so much that I care what he thinks but I want to show him that I'm serious about being done with him. I wanna make it clear to him that I've had enough of his BS and that I will no longer put up and tolerate his ass-hole behavior towards me.
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