Author potestatum Posted July 28, 2014 Author Posted July 28, 2014 I mean people are usually attracted to their traits of their parent/authority figures as well as being attracted to traits they themselves find strong. She either learned to be manipulative from someone in authority to her (probably manipulating her) or learned it as a "survival" mechanism. In all honesty, it takes some level of crazy / heartlessness to manipulate others with no regards to how it will turn out for them (what she is doing to you). However, on the opposite, leaders often employ manipulation for the benefit of the pact. What others have suggested here uses small forms of it. Employing NC while flaunting a new significant other, while immature, is a basic form of manipulation. In order to be successful at manipulation you yourself must be very strong willed and able to ignore the pain that will come from what you do; as well as the pain from small setbacks/temporary resistance (as is all part of a proper manipulation.) Honestly though, IMO, if you are willing to do that to a person, you probably don't belong with that person. (Or perhaps, since both parties are engaging in it, they are perfect for one another.) Just know it is not the path of least resistance. It sounds good!! But i don't know if I can do it. I am using NC though. I think I will give it a try.
Chi townD Posted July 28, 2014 Posted July 28, 2014 Dude, really? JUST MOVE ON! Look, you wrote that you tried to work on thing 3 DIFFERENT TIMES AND FAILED ALL THREE TIMES!!! It is obvious that this isn't the girl for you! You tried and it didn't work! Now, you're holding yourself up from healing from this and finding the girl that IS right for you. Time to move on, dude. This crap has been going on for far too long. 1
Author potestatum Posted July 29, 2014 Author Posted July 29, 2014 Dude, really? JUST MOVE ON! Look, you wrote that you tried to work on thing 3 DIFFERENT TIMES AND FAILED ALL THREE TIMES!!! It is obvious that this isn't the girl for you! You tried and it didn't work! Now, you're holding yourself up from healing from this and finding the girl that IS right for you. Time to move on, dude. This crap has been going on for far too long. Yeah.. That is the right thing to do but I can't stop thinking of her and the years we were together..
Simon Phoenix Posted July 29, 2014 Posted July 29, 2014 Yeah.. That is the right thing to do but I can't stop thinking of her and the years we were together.. So you are going to pointlessly try to resuscitate something that's already broke three times and waste more time? That seems like a foolish train of thought.
Author potestatum Posted July 29, 2014 Author Posted July 29, 2014 So you are going to pointlessly try to resuscitate something that's already broke three times and waste more time? That seems like a foolish train of thought. But how do you move on when something's holding you back? How do you let it go?
Simon Phoenix Posted July 29, 2014 Posted July 29, 2014 But how do you move on when something's holding you back? How do you let it go? It's like any other addiction -- you have to resist the urge and over time, its hold on you will be less and less. Honestly, the only thing holding you back is yourself. All your pain from here on out is completely self-inflicted. Making crappy decisions in the past to cave isn't adequate justification for continuing to make crappy decisions. It's not supposed to be easy. Most things worth doing aren't. You just have to be patient, stay the course and stop caving all the time. 1
Author potestatum Posted August 21, 2014 Author Posted August 21, 2014 Today I made it clear that I don’t want her to contact me again. I deleted and blocked her from social media and from my phone. If it hurts so much why should I get in love again?
Author potestatum Posted August 26, 2014 Author Posted August 26, 2014 Hello again, There is something more with my ex that I would like to hear your opinion because it is so confusing. I mean I know I have to let go, but I want to be 100% sure that I am doing the right thing. My ex does not want a relationship with anyone at the time. That includes me too. She is not ready and she does not know the exact reason. What she wants is to speak occassionally but not talk about reconciliation and time will show if we will be together again. She loves me and she is thinking about me but she has some issues so she is not ready for a relationship.. My question is should I move on and use NC, or chat with her occassionallyt and see what happens? Please advice..
Chi townD Posted August 26, 2014 Posted August 26, 2014 MOVE ON DUDE!!! GO NC AND STAY THERE!!! How is she going to miss you if you're in contact with her? How is she going to know what life is going to be like without you in it?
April Moon Posted August 26, 2014 Posted August 26, 2014 Please move on and use NC (which means no contact EVER for any reason).
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