Haydn Posted February 6, 2014 Share Posted February 6, 2014 Leave, sorry. You cannot keep this up, you seem like a very strong person. Do not carry him. Something bad could happen. I know i do not know your whole situation but you seem very tired and you have had enough now. I'm happy for small victories but overall I'm exhausted. On a daily basis his depressed/angry about "life" and looks to me to build him up. I feel like a broken record repeating the same things to try to make him feel better. We were in the car an he was being reckless (tailgating and excessive speeding). This usually happens when he's in a mood. I asked him what's bothering him to cause all this and he said he's upset about his life. Past mistakes, choices, current situation and future looking bleak. Am I wrong to think that I am the ONLY one holding this family together? I mean, I have a 2.5 year old throwing tantrums and a husband that can't hold it together for more than 5 minutes at a time. Link to post Share on other sites
Eivuwan Posted February 7, 2014 Share Posted February 7, 2014 I'm happy for small victories but overall I'm exhausted. On a daily basis his depressed/angry about "life" and looks to me to build him up. I feel like a broken record repeating the same things to try to make him feel better. We were in the car an he was being reckless (tailgating and excessive speeding). This usually happens when he's in a mood. I asked him what's bothering him to cause all this and he said he's upset about his life. Past mistakes, choices, current situation and future looking bleak. Am I wrong to think that I am the ONLY one holding this family together? I mean, I have a 2.5 year old throwing tantrums and a husband that can't hold it together for more than 5 minutes at a time. I think you need to figure out how much more you can take. Also, the only way that these problems can be fixed is if your husband cares about fixing them as much as you. I get the sense that he tends to be in denial more often than not. Link to post Share on other sites
Author winterpast Posted February 7, 2014 Author Share Posted February 7, 2014 He's not doing it intentionally and I know that. He is suffering from quite a few physical ailments along with the mental ones. He's under a great amount of stress and I can see it breaking him apart. I fear he may have a true mental breakdown soon. I'm trying to take it one day at a time. Link to post Share on other sites
Eivuwan Posted February 7, 2014 Share Posted February 7, 2014 He's not doing it intentionally and I know that. He is suffering from quite a few physical ailments along with the mental ones. He's under a great amount of stress and I can see it breaking him apart. I fear he may have a true mental breakdown soon. I'm trying to take it one day at a time. Is he willing to have weekly therapy sessions? Going to a psychiatrist once in a while for meds doesn't seem to be that helpful (esp if he's not taking them properly). Link to post Share on other sites
Author winterpast Posted February 7, 2014 Author Share Posted February 7, 2014 I think you need to figure out how much more you can take. Also, the only way that these problems can be fixed is if your husband cares about fixing them as much as you. I get the sense that he tends to be in denial more often than not. I have to be able to take care of myself and I will be keeping in mind how much my limit will be. He can be in denial but some of that has been with the struggles with his health issues too. He's been to several doctors about his symptoms and had several (expensive) tests, just to be told that they have no idea why he's in constant pain or passing blood. He feels like he's being told he's making things up, which in turn, makes him hesitate going to a doctor. Link to post Share on other sites
Author winterpast Posted February 7, 2014 Author Share Posted February 7, 2014 Is he willing to have weekly therapy sessions? Going to a psychiatrist once in a while for meds doesn't seem to be that helpful (esp if he's not taking them properly). I think if he was willing to change therapists then he would if he was told to. Link to post Share on other sites
Eivuwan Posted February 7, 2014 Share Posted February 7, 2014 Yeah the person he is going to right no w doesn't seem helpful. It is not normal to have thoughts like that as often as he has them. I can't believe that the advice us to just not talk about it. What do you mean by passing blood? Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 I have to be able to take care of myself and I will be keeping in mind how much my limit will be. He can be in denial but some of that has been with the struggles with his health issues too. He's been to several doctors about his symptoms and had several (expensive) tests, just to be told that they have no idea why he's in constant pain or passing blood. He feels like he's being told he's making things up, which in turn, makes him hesitate going to a doctor. Has he had check ups for kidney stones? Blood tests for cancer? Or colonscopy? Not sure how anybody can tell him he's making it up since the evidence is there. He should gather it up and take that to the Dr! Get it tested to see what is going on. Link to post Share on other sites
Author winterpast Posted February 8, 2014 Author Share Posted February 8, 2014 Sorry, don't know why I mentioned other than it's been a big deal lately. Yes, bloody stool and we are currently trying to figure out what's going on. He's been having symptoms for a year and went to his regular doctor about it in December. Dr. said it was most likely Cancer and sent DH to a Gastroenterologist. We went and were told that he needs a Colonoscopy to identify the problem. Went and had that done last month and they didn't find anything during the procedure. They also took biopsies and those came back clean. He's had numerous tests but they have yet to figure out what's going on. Good news is he doesn't have Cancer Link to post Share on other sites
Author winterpast Posted February 8, 2014 Author Share Posted February 8, 2014 Has he had check ups for kidney stones? Blood tests for cancer? Or colonscopy? Not sure how anybody can tell him he's making it up since the evidence is there. He should gather it up and take that to the Dr! Get it tested to see what is going on. He feels like everyone thinks he's making it up but that doesn't mean he's actually been told that. He thinks they should be able to fix it with a pill and be done with it. He thinks no answers to the problem means it's all in his head. The way it's looking, it might be a benign condition that he will have to live with. Link to post Share on other sites
Author winterpast Posted February 8, 2014 Author Share Posted February 8, 2014 Yeah the person he is going to right no w doesn't seem helpful. It is not normal to have thoughts like that as often as he has them. I can't believe that the advice us to just not talk about it. What do you mean by passing blood? I agree he needs a new therapist but he's never been good about change. I've mentioned it before and he wasn't too keen on the idea. Link to post Share on other sites
beach Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 If he's taking multiple medicine and/or taking more than prescribed (as you indicated) - he could be having black out times - and not remembering what he's actually done. Go with him for his dr visit - and discuss your concerns - his dosage - his behavior - and his fear in getting off any of the meds. He may needs to consider options to get off his meds...or adjust it. What's he taking? How much? How often? Improperly taking psych meds can trigger the symptoms you're describing. He may not have a firm grip on reality. The way you are living sounds abusive. No reason to live that way. Link to post Share on other sites
Author winterpast Posted February 8, 2014 Author Share Posted February 8, 2014 If he's taking multiple medicine and/or taking more than prescribed (as you indicated) - he could be having black out times - and not remembering what he's actually done. Go with him for his dr visit - and discuss your concerns - his dosage - his behavior - and his fear in getting off any of the meds. He may needs to consider options to get off his meds...or adjust it. What's he taking? How much? How often? Improperly taking psych meds can trigger the symptoms you're describing. He may not have a firm grip on reality. The way you are living sounds abusive. No reason to live that way. I agree. I feel like it's time for him to get all medications looked at to make sure they're not the cause of these issues. I don't know if he will be able to get off of all of them because of previous health conditions. I don't think he has a firm grip either. I plan to make some changes...I won't live like this for much longer. He will have the choice to seek better help or I will take matters in my own hands. Link to post Share on other sites
beach Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 Does he partake in any drugs? Like... Heroin or meth? What is he prescribed by the dr? Link to post Share on other sites
Author winterpast Posted February 8, 2014 Author Share Posted February 8, 2014 Does he partake in any drugs? Like... Heroin or meth? What is he prescribed by the dr? No, he doesn't do any drugs like that. He doesn't drink either. He's prescribed other medications to help treat a chronic migraine condition that he's had since 5 years old. There's about 5-7 different ones. He takes those as prescribed. He's prescribed Xanax by the therapist but he found out that he can't take more than prescribed with that one because he can't get it refilled early. He takes ambien (per therapist) that he is only suppose to take 1/2-1 pill but takes 2 pills. He has a few OTC pain killers that he takes more of than suggested on the box. Link to post Share on other sites
beach Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 Xanax and Ambien Side Effects - Drug Withdrawal, Memory Loss, Dementia - AARP Not intended to be taken together. Very concerning. Does his dr know he's taking both? Or all those meds? Or is he seeing one dr for some and another dr for the other medication? Which other 5-7 does he take? Oxy? Percocet? Dilaudid? Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 He feels like everyone thinks he's making it up but that doesn't mean he's actually been told that. He thinks they should be able to fix it with a pill and be done with it. He thinks no answers to the problem means it's all in his head. The way it's looking, it might be a benign condition that he will have to live with. Tell him to change his eating habits, see a nutritionist and go from there. Could be he has IBS (irritable bowel syndrome) and that can be controlled with meds and change in what he drinks and eats. Link to post Share on other sites
Author winterpast Posted February 8, 2014 Author Share Posted February 8, 2014 (edited) Xanax and Ambien Side Effects - Drug Withdrawal, Memory Loss, Dementia - AARP Not intended to be taken together. Very concerning. Does his dr know he's taking both? Or all those meds? Or is he seeing one dr for some and another dr for the other medication? Which other 5-7 does he take? Oxy? Percocet? Dilaudid? Therapist prescribed the Xanax and Ambien together. There was another medication (can't remember the name but it was another antidepressant) that she had prescribed him to take along with these. He took one night's dose and had a scary "black out" night. He was very suicidal acting and wasn't making any since. He was also seeing things and talking to people that weren't there. The next morning I told him about it and he was very confused and scared about what happened. He flushed those pills and never refilled that RX. The others are prescribed by a different doctor...was established by a neurologist but was told to get his refills from the PCP. Etodolac- as needed for migraines Citalopram (this is a antidepressant but was prescribed this by neurologist because some studies show it helps migraines Fioricet-as needed for migraines Verapamil-for the migraines Most recent ailment: Dicyclomine- To help with the stomach issues. Edited February 8, 2014 by winterpast To organize post better Link to post Share on other sites
beach Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 Ambien alone is highly addictive and does cause major (long term - even weeks long) episodes of black outs. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
hotgurl Posted February 10, 2014 Share Posted February 10, 2014 I think he needs his meds reviewed. I to have chronic migraines and also was on. pain killers, Zanax, anti depressants and sleeping aids and muscle relaxers. that is a killer combo literally. When Heath Ledger dies I was taking 6 or the seen meds he OD on. he muscle relaxer reacted with the anit depressent and made me anxious also on of the anti depressants made me behave really irrational and angry. The kicker is you just think you mad for good reason and don't realize it is the medicine. My husband said something and I went off of them and then my mood stabilized. I had to fight the doctor to do it because even tough it was a known side effect they didn't believe me. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted February 10, 2014 Share Posted February 10, 2014 Though I did mention a suggestion for med review early on, I concur with posters subsequent to the med listing and reiterate that suggestion in stronger terms. He NEEDS to have this cocktail examined by a brain professional, including any other non-rx meds or supplements he's taking. Over-medicating and/or using meds together is a really common cause of behavioral abnormalities and is completely resolvable. The professional will have the best advice but mine has always been to reverse titrate per pharmacy guidelines to a baseline state, then asses and re-rx *slowly* and with constant monitoring as recommended solutions are added. My solution for the monitoring part was a daily journal, which I'd share with the team leader either by phone or during interviews. The professionals know their stuff and can see things from experience that I would miss but the journals kept them up to date and they could extrapolate from the information provided or ask direct questions to augment future journaling. Easy? NO! OP, if you need help, GET IT! Even if that is some respite care for your children so you can 'check out' for awhile and go to a friends house and de-stress. This stuff can cook you up and damage your health! My sympathies. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts