808alfa Posted December 24, 2013 Posted December 24, 2013 http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/449938-1-month-into-3-month-break-warning-long-story Short summary: she wanted a 3mo break. I went along for a month. Then I told her its over for good, at which point we got back together. Gave it a shot for a few days. Her attitude didn't change much and my gut told me she probably still had GIGS type feelings and only told me we're back "together" to keep me on the string. So i decided to drop out of her life, NC. Its been hard, especially when she txted: "Good morning love, what are u up to today?" Had a strong urge to text back, but I held strong. Anyways, its Xmas and I can't help but want to see her. I still love her so much, but I just couldn't be her fallback, for my own good. What I would say to her if i saw her one last time (i didn't say goodbye): Dear ***** Thank you for everything. These past 2 years were amazing, some of the best times of my life. Thanks for being through the good and the bad, for laughing with me, walking by my side, holding my hand, sweet kisses, and passionate love. All those little notes and letters you wrote, I still guard them. But don't dare open them back up. Before you I didn't know what love was. Thanks for showing me. We always said we'd grow old together, and maybe that was childish, but I am grateful for the blissful ignorance of our young love. I hope one day our paths cross again and we can be friends, and I'm sorry that can't be right now. Its just something I need to do. I gotta keep moving without looking back, without holding on. I'm proud of you for leaving. I know it wasn't an easy decision to make, but I agree that it will make you a better person. I hope you "find yourself", and whatever else you seek. If we ever do meet again, you still owe me a dance. I will always love you.
julzfromsa Posted December 24, 2013 Posted December 24, 2013 http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/449938-1-month-into-3-month-break-warning-long-story Short summary: she wanted a 3mo break. I went along for a month. Then I told her its over for good, at which point we got back together. Gave it a shot for a few days. Her attitude didn't change much and my gut told me she probably still had GIGS type feelings and only told me we're back "together" to keep me on the string. So i decided to drop out of her life, NC. Its been hard, especially when she txted: "Good morning love, what are u up to today?" Had a strong urge to text back, but I held strong. Anyways, its Xmas and I can't help but want to see her. I still love her so much, but I just couldn't be her fallback, for my own good. What I would say to her if i saw her one last time (i didn't say goodbye): Dear ***** Thank you for everything. These past 2 years were amazing, some of the best times of my life. Thanks for being through the good and the bad, for laughing with me, walking by my side, holding my hand, sweet kisses, and passionate love. All those little notes and letters you wrote, I still guard them. But don't dare open them back up. Before you I didn't know what love was. Thanks for showing me. We always said we'd grow old together, and maybe that was childish, but I am grateful for the blissful ignorance of our young love. I hope one day our paths cross again and we can be friends, and I'm sorry that can't be right now. Its just something I need to do. I gotta keep moving without looking back, without holding on. I'm proud of you for leaving. I know it wasn't an easy decision to make, but I agree that it will make you a better person. I hope you "find yourself", and whatever else you seek. If we ever do meet again, you still owe me a dance. I will always love you. Its so weird how it all sounds exactly the same. My ex said this to me almost word for word. The only thing that needs to be said is that i dont love you anymore. Its the only thing i can accept right now. The whole finding yourself thing doesnt fly by me. She either loves you or not mate. Her choice and try your best for NC. Delete and block. Change numbers. Just dont go there. I also got that maybe our paths will cross one day - Man, that line hurts me. If someone wants to be with me, they will make GOD damn sure our paths cross right now. Never hope or hold on to that "one day" because that one day only happens when the creatures of this earth rule it. Be strong, your not the only one hurting - i promise you that
Author 808alfa Posted December 25, 2013 Author Posted December 25, 2013 UGGHHH Please remind me why NC is important, I'm having a hard time not calling back for Christmas. She's called 5 times. She's txted the following: "Would love to see you today. I miss you." "I know ur avoiding me lol. Please answer... is xmas" "Please dont be like this... call me, at least for christmas tomorrow." I'm having a strong urge to call back! please advice.
headinthecloud Posted December 25, 2013 Posted December 25, 2013 Don't do it. She left you. She made that choice, not you. She has to deal with it. She's being selfish by asking you go contact her. Stay NC! It's for you to heal, not about punishing her. She broke your heart, don't be so quick to be there for her as you're not being fair to yourself. You deserve someone who will move mountains for you. The person you love is gone, she left you. If she really loved you she wouldn't have left. You will get through this. Be strong. Merry Christmas. 1
Author 808alfa Posted December 26, 2013 Author Posted December 26, 2013 Please don't crucify me, but I broke NC. Only after she called like 10 times, and sent me a 3 paragraph text asking for me to please answer the phone. I gave in. Truth is I still love her. The conversation went well, I'm glad I followed my heart in that, but at the same time I remained very level-headed and calm during our conversation. She on the other hand was crying, very emotional. I explained why I dropped out of her life, my gut told me even though we got back together that one night, she probably still has that urge to get out there and experience life on her own. That's the reason she wanted a break in the first place, and I felt like we were trying to force our relationship because we were both afraid of letting go. She told me she loved me, and apologized for dragging this out so long. I wished her the best, and forgave her for everything. I told her I'm not mad, and there is nothing wrong with her wanting to go on this journey. She's gotta do what she's gotta do. I thanked her for the amazing experience these past two years, and for being my first love... for teaching me what love was. She thanked me for the same. She feels that we'll reunite someday when the time is right. I doubt that, but I kept it to myself. She really wanted to meet in person for this goodbye, but I told her that's a bad idea, that I would probably jump on her and we would want to get back together again. She agreed. So finally, this is the conclusion to this relationship, to my first love. I hope others learn from this post. I don't think breaks are ever a good thing. Even with the purest of intentions and determination to get back together. In the end, if someone asks for a break it usually means its over in a matter of time. If there are issues, work them out together, or break up completely.
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