I feel like giving up on dating

[Disillusioned]

Don't give up but if you're getting a bit low from searching just take a break from actively seeking and enjoy just being single and independent for a bit. It might just happen when you least expect it.

 

Yes!!! Someone across town might switch on their ESP and follow your brainwaves right to your front door!

[Frank2thepoint]

After being on a number of advice and/or discussion forums, I've come to the conclusion that it's not much more than:

 

1. Women complaing about dating crappy men

 

and

 

2. Non-crappy men not finding women to date

 

Yep, this sums up LS. A bit simplistic, but on point.

[Teraskas]

Yes!!! Someone across town might switch on their ESP and follow your brainwaves right to your front door!

 

I'm still building a signal mast to amplify those brainwaves.

[ZipperZapper]

Yes!!! Someone across town might switch on their ESP and follow your brainwaves right to your front door!

 

And I might just buy a lottery ticket and win the lottery when I least expected to!!

[Tayken]

Yep, this sums up LS. A bit simplistic, but on point.

 

Goes back to them not knowing what they want.....I mean in business, you have a business plan otherwise you will fail. They keep crying us a river

[Leigh 87]

Jeez, you make it sound so easy. All people have to do is 'go after what they want', and it will magically appear for them. What do you say to the man or woman who has done everything they possibly can, for years and years to get they want, and still end up with nothing? "Too bad about your luck", is that it?

 

Seriously, your attitude seems to come across like, "I got mine, I'm alright Jack."

 

 

 

Look. Dating is hard for even the best looking people; people who have the most romantic interest still struggle at the whole numbers game element to dating.

 

Frankly, I had to get braces, get rid of my acne through extensive research and going on a dangerous drug that I wasn't supposed to take (I couldn't afford specializes treatment).

I also stopped eating too much, learnt what looks best on my body type and developed a great sense of style.

 

 

It's unfair, but I had to significantly increase my level of perceived physical attractiveness in order to get myself an active dating life.

 

Being a "nice person" never got me dates:; I was very unpleasant to look at.

 

 

In addition to my looks, I also know myself well enough to be pursuing a career path I am passionate about. I am becoming my ideal self through being nice to people and working towards the life I most want opposed to settling for any job just to earn a living.

 

You definitely need the looks side to things in order to make it possible to even have a dating life.

You need to attract and maintain the attraction on once your looks get you through the door.

 

I'm not bad looking yet I had guys use me for sex whilst pretending to be totally crazy about me.

My friend who is a model never dates as she can't find guys she fancies. When she does they prefer larger chicks or Asians or another "type" to her (a petite and super pretty blonde).

Then there is my good friend who is stunning. She has been in relationships since age 17 with men who are crazy about her.

 

It's really a mixed bag when it comes to dating and it's correlation to you're physical attributes (or lack there of).

 

If you're not attractive to many people in a physical sense, you meed to fix that AND your lack of desirability when it comes to your personality/interpersonal skills and the like.

[topaMAXX]

I am sorta close to give up on dating. I am getting discouraged after meeting the wrong men. I haven't met that many guys but I hope I do find someone.

 

Well, you are a woman. So I would give you the stock answer of "stop being so picky then" and "just do online dating".

 

But this will fall on deaf ears.

[ZipperZapper]

Look. Dating is hard for even the best looking people; people who have the most romantic interest still struggle at the whole numbers game element to dating.

 

Frankly, I had to get braces, get rid of my acne through extensive research and going on a dangerous drug that I wasn't supposed to take (I couldn't afford specializes treatment).

I also stopped eating too much, learnt what looks best on my body type and developed a great sense of style.

 

 

It's unfair, but I had to significantly increase my level of perceived physical attractiveness in order to get myself an active dating life.

 

Being a "nice person" never got me dates:; I was very unpleasant to look at.

 

 

In addition to my looks, I also know myself well enough to be pursuing a career path I am passionate about. I am becoming my ideal self through being nice to people and working towards the life I most want opposed to settling for any job just to earn a living.

 

You definitely need the looks side to things in order to make it possible to even have a dating life.

You need to attract and maintain the attraction on once your looks get you through the door.

 

I'm not bad looking yet I had guys use me for sex whilst pretending to be totally crazy about me.

My friend who is a model never dates as she can't find guys she fancies. When she does they prefer larger chicks or Asians or another "type" to her (a petite and super pretty blonde).

Then there is my good friend who is stunning. She has been in relationships since age 17 with men who are crazy about her.

 

It's really a mixed bag when it comes to dating and it's correlation to you're physical attributes (or lack there of).

 

If you're not attractive to many people in a physical sense, you meed to fix that AND your lack of desirability when it comes to your personality/interpersonal skills and the like.

 

Basically, what I hear you saying is, "Ugly people should not be allowed to date, since everything hinges on physical attractiveness anyway." Short of getting a face transplant, getting all my natural teeth replaced with a model's teeth, and finding some way to eliminate my weight issue where diet and exercise haven't worked, there isn't a whole lot I can do.

 

I still think it all boils down to the fact that some people are not meant to find love, that love is something reserved only for a lucky few.

[Tayken]

Being a "nice person" never got me dates:; I was very unpleasant to look at.

 

What is your definition of "nice" and what has that got to do with getting dates? I mean am not necessarily going to go out with you because you self proclaim that you are "nice", "think you are good looking" etc

 

A lot of it will depend on your rational thinking, education, ability to carry a conversation with F - bombs in every sentence, employment status, and nothing to do with me thinking with the ubiquitous head

[Tayken]

ETA: Most men are attracted to Brunettes as their ideal partner. However, they will bang anything else temporarily

[ZipperZapper]

ETA: Most men are attracted to Brunettes as their ideal partner. However, they will bang anything else temporarily

 

Yep. I always find brunettes to be most attractive, particularly the ones with dark brown hair that almost looks black. I don't know where that comes from, but it's a very strong preference for me. Couple that hair colour with blue eyes, and I'm in heaven.

 

But where I live that kind of hair colour is fairly uncommon. There are tons and tons of blondes in my area. Blue eyes are also extremely common.

[Tayken]

Yep. I always find brunettes to be most attractive, particularly the ones with dark brown hair that almost looks black. I don't know where that comes from, but it's a very strong preference for me. Couple that hair colour with blue eyes, and I'm in heaven.

 

But where I live that kind of hair colour is fairly uncommon. There are tons and tons of blondes in my area. Blue eyes are also extremely common.

 

You are not alone in those thoughts....

 

Am I the only one who doesn't really care for fake blondes? I mean all I get from the peroxide queens is, that they are not happy with themselves i.e. self esteem is low hence the need to try to portray something else.

 

Makes you wonder what else they are hiding / being dishonest about....dark secrets

[ZipperZapper]

You are not alone in those thoughts....

 

Am I the only one who doesn't really care for fake blondes? I mean all I get from the peroxide queens is, that they are not happy with themselves i.e. self esteem is low hence the need to try to portray something else.

 

Makes you wonder what else they are hiding / being dishonest about....dark secrets

 

I don't think it's always a case of 'peroxide queens' hiding their true hair colour in my neck of the woods. Blonde hair is extremely common in most English-speaking parts of Canada. As proof, I offer the fact that lots of girls when I went to elementary school and high school had naturally blonde hair. I've even briefly dated a couple in the distant past. When I was in Grade 8, there was a blond girl who was absolutely smitten with me.

 

Now, I don't mean this as a slight against blondes, but I find that they appear to me as 'less substantial' somehow, and I always gravitate towards the darker-haired women. I suppose that gravitation is the same thing for me as it is for women who always gravitate towards tall guys, LOL.

[D.Mc.]

Dear Eggplant: Don't ever think you have nothing to give. I haven't been physical w/a man in a loooong time & I definitely want to kiss/touch again. I'm not saying just go for a hookup (unless you are 100% comfortable & safe), but we have to keep trying. I'm on OLD & getting a taste of the frustrations/confusions of that world, but there's always tomorrow. You are attractive to someone, you just haven't met them yet.