Winter blue Posted December 12, 2013 Posted December 12, 2013 My 2-month ex called me today at work after four months of NC, we broke up in July and I went NC in August. I wasn't thinking when I pick up the phone because she called from a land line that I don't recognize. As I said to a friend, if she have called on my mobile, I would probably let it go into the answer phone. Here is the conversation: me: Hello Winter blue speaking her: Hey it's me. I just wanna say congratulations for passing your exam and have a merry Christmas and happy New Year. I will see you around. (I had my chartered accountant exam last month and she knew I was preparing it when we were together) me: Thanks, hmm...you will see me around? her: yeah you know on the streets in the city somewhere. (we work close to each other) me: oh. so..how have you been? her: been good, and you? me: great, thanks. her: so how was the exam, was it hard, easy pizzy, piece of cake? me: I wouldn't call it a piece of cake. her: hehe, so.. are you a CA now, or still working towards to it? me: pretty much. her: okay.. I will leave you to it. me: thanks for your call. her: ok bye me:bye I don't know what to think the moment she called. My brain just went blank. We haven't speaking for months, although she has been acting weird lately by viewing my Linkedin profiles (twice), and blocking me on facebook (after BU for 5 months). All those happened in the last three weeks, and now she is calling, what does she really want. I read her viewing my Linkedin profile as being curious after I have gone NC on her. then she blocked me on facebook last week (and she was the dumper!) when I wasn't even active, basically I just vanished from her life after the BU, including my facebook appearance. Because I was so busy preparing my exam and at the same time I don't want to see a thing from her. I hide her stuff on mine. Funny she can block me now when she was the one saying un-friends on fb would hurt at the time of our BU. The last thing I want to do is to raise any false hope, I was moving on so well the month before.. Anyone with similar experiences can shed some light here would be great.
ConfusedHumanBeing Posted December 12, 2013 Posted December 12, 2013 My 2-month ex called me today at work after four months of NC, we broke up in July and I went NC in August. I wasn't thinking when I pick up the phone because she called from a land line that I don't recognize. As I said to a friend, if she have called on my mobile, I would probably let it go into the answer phone. Here is the conversation: me: Hello Winter blue speaking her: Hey it's me. I just wanna say congratulations for passing your exam and have a merry Christmas and happy New Year. I will see you around. (I had my chartered accountant exam last month and she knew I was preparing it when we were together) me: Thanks, hmm...you will see me around? her: yeah you know on the streets in the city somewhere. (we work close to each other) me: oh. so..how have you been? her: been good, and you? me: great, thanks. her: so how was the exam, was it hard, easy pizzy, piece of cake? me: I wouldn't call it a piece of cake. her: hehe, so.. are you a CA now, or still working towards to it? me: pretty much. her: okay.. I will leave you to it. me: thanks for your call. her: ok bye me:bye I don't know what to think the moment she called. My brain just went blank. We haven't speaking for months, although she has been acting weird lately by viewing my Linkedin profiles (twice), and blocking me on facebook (after BU for 5 months). All those happened in the last three weeks, and now she is calling, what does she really want. I read her viewing my Linkedin profile as being curious after I have gone NC on her. then she blocked me on facebook last week (and she was the dumper!) when I wasn't even active, basically I just vanished from her life after the BU, including my facebook appearance. Because I was so busy preparing my exam and at the same time I don't want to see a thing from her. I hide her stuff on mine. Funny she can block me now when she was the one saying un-friends on fb would hurt at the time of our BU. The last thing I want to do is to raise any false hope, I was moving on so well the month before.. Anyone with similar experiences can shed some light here would be great. Nothing has changed. Just keep doing what you were doing. Dont read into it. And how do you know any of these things about her blocking you and what not? Thats not going NC
Sososad Posted December 12, 2013 Posted December 12, 2013 I really hope you don't fall into the trap these Contacts can cause. I know a complete meaningless Text I got threw me back weeks and weeks in recovery. Try forget it and move on . Put it out of Your mind and TRY forget it,easier said then done! Stay strong !!
Mrlonelyone Posted December 12, 2013 Posted December 12, 2013 Read this thread on NC. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/coping/337989-no-contact-nc-guide-long-walk-consolidated-discussion The one thing that is generally agreed on is that anything like the above is bread crumbs. They mean nothing romantically. The only thing that does mean anything is if they dumper says "I was wrong". "I want you back and I have seen the error of my ways." They have to say it and really mean it. With this kind of emotional content. A real come to Jesus moment about how they dumped you.
Author Winter blue Posted December 12, 2013 Author Posted December 12, 2013 (edited) Thanks guys for your reply, all of you are right. I don't think anything she said yesterday meant anything material. And I'm trying my best to not read into it. How I found out she blocked me on fb? When I log onto my own profile last week her little profile pic disappeared from the top of my friends list for the first time in five months (sily fb still show her as my closest friend somehow after the BU even though we didn't have any interactions in the last 5 mths). I thought that's weird so I clicked an old comment of her on my timeline and nothing showed up, I believe she has blcoked me. I know it's for the best, and I should have blocked her long time ago. It's just when we broke up she asked me to not delete her on fb, she said that hurts (sily me still trying to not hurt her at that time!). What further confused me is she has kept viewing my Linkedin profile after she blocked me on fb. I don't know if she is playing some sort of mind games or what, trying to get my attention? I have removed her from my Linkedin connection now. She doesn't deserve my attention anymore. I'm actually doing really well since we broke up. I passed my ca exam, get qualified, got a pay rise, and got promoted. Talking about breaking NC, I had absolute no contact with her for the last five months. She emailed me once at 2.5 mth mark wishing me good luck to my exam, to which I just ignored. She wanted us to stay friends at the time of BU (we were friends before the relationship), I told her I cannot be friends with you if we are not together. I don't know which part of that statement she didn't understand that now she think it's okay to be in touch again after months passed by :-/ Mr lonely - thanks for the Youtube video, crack me up hehe. Edited December 12, 2013 by Winter blue typo
Am4Real Posted December 12, 2013 Posted December 12, 2013 She is selfishly satisfying her own curiosity because you left her alone. After your three or four exchanges how can it be any more obvious that to say to you "okay.. I will leave you to it." There was a perfect opportunity to present her intentions, if she had any, and all she did was satisfy the fact you would still talk to her "on her demand" and then she left with that bit of knowledge. How old is she, let me guess, somewhere between 21 and 25 with the maturity of a 17 year old?
Author Winter blue Posted December 12, 2013 Author Posted December 12, 2013 She is selfishly satisfying her own curiosity because you left her alone. After your three or four exchanges how can it be any more obvious that to say to you "okay.. I will leave you to it." There was a perfect opportunity to present her intentions, if she had any, and all she did was satisfy the fact you would still talk to her "on her demand" and then she left with that bit of knowledge. How old is she, let me guess, somewhere between 21 and 25 with the maturity of a 17 year old? You got it on the spot, Am4real. She had her opportunity to say something but she didn't. I was cold and polite on the phone and trying to keep my answer short, there were awkward moments but I really didn't want to start chit chat with her again. I guess she get it at the end. But you are correct - if she had any intention to reconcile she would have said it. To your surprise, she is 28, not that young but she is emotionally inmature for sure. This also is reflected in the way she dealt with our relationship. She basically left her ex for me, and 2 months later she went back to the same ex. I don't know if they are still together (and I don't care) but the fact she could dump me at the drop of a hat, when the ex kept chasing her back, made me to believe she didn't know what she really want.
Mrlonelyone Posted December 12, 2013 Posted December 12, 2013 Actually your situation sounds much like the one I've been dealing with. The thing is the woman isn't all that sure what she wants and is unsure. She does not want a relationship with you right now. Yet, she still does care about you somewhat. The woman I've been dealing with blocked me on FB, then introduced me to her family who she had told all about me. :/ She asked for no contact at all, then contacted me indirectly inviting me to a function. :\ She refuses to respond to a straight forward email, yet she'll message me on a couple other social medias. :? Now the young woman I'm dealing with is about as mature as she should be at her age...which is much less than 28 but old enough to drink. A 28 year old acting the way you have described needs to grow up. It's like a girl who likes you throwing a toy at you in kindergarten or something.
Author Winter blue Posted December 13, 2013 Author Posted December 13, 2013 A 28 year old acting the way you have described needs to grow up. It's like a girl who likes you throwing a toy at you in kindergarten or something. I can't agree more on this, lol You are right she is still unsure of what she wants, and I'm not going to put my life on hold for her. I shall keep moving on.
Insanityisdoingsame Posted December 13, 2013 Posted December 13, 2013 It doesn't mean anything except she is bored/lonely . Hitting you up for her own benefits but in reality doesn't give a crap about reconciling. Block her. Move to cali, plenty of dimes there you can start over with. Good luck bro
organizedchaos Posted December 13, 2013 Posted December 13, 2013 I can't agree more on this, lol You are right she is still unsure of what she wants, and I'm not going to put my life on hold for her. I shall keep moving on. Similar to my story. She didn't leave me for someone else but unsure what she wants. She's 33. We were together almost 3 years.
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