Yasuandio Posted November 29, 2013 Posted November 29, 2013 uggh, this is an uneasy feeling. feeling hopeless, unwanted and like i'm no good. There is only one sentiment above that none of U's on LS will agree with, the one in italics. You are a good value as a human bring. You just feel bad. She didn't feel you were right for her. Soon enough, the right girl is going to come along - this relationship was just a practice run. NEVER, ever say "I'm no good." like this is giving up. It is giving up. You'll soon find that giving up will be liberating. sucks because my birthday and christmas are coming up, Those are really only two days out of 365 days of the year. They are only days, just like yesterday's holiday was a day that has now passed. Friends or no friends (alone like me - a recluse), you can make it. and i'm going to be depressed. Perhaps so, for awhile. But at least now you are out of Denial - and that is a lot of progress! Sorry we had to be so hard on you, but you needed it. Now, it's time to be good to yourself, feel the pain (grieve), and the next thing you know, you're gonna be pissed off. But you will stay NC. Eventually, you'll come full circle to acceptance. Be strong. Come here if you get tempted again. It happens. I wrote a sappy letter about a month ago, and had it all ready to mail, with the stamps, it needed two stamps cause it was so long. Thank God I stopped myself. I've been separated 5 years, divorced just last year. You are alone, Hon. The loss of a 28 year marriage is like having your arm amputated with a needle. It is so hard to let go, I truly understand. But when you do, it really is liberating. But you'll have a relapse once in awhile - depending on how long the relationship was. Just come here to discuss it. Yas 1
Author Wall E Posted November 30, 2013 Author Posted November 30, 2013 OMG. i sent a text to her while i was intoxicated last night! damn, so while i was at the club, i guess i got super drunk, because i sent the text to her without thinking. i said "i know that i've been immature and i can't change you or make things happen. i not bitter about anything now. i care about you and i only want the best for you, with or without me. so i'm sorry." was that bad??
chris21422 Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 Man just do whatever you want. Obviously you don't listen to anyone here anyway. You just made yourself like a wimp sending that message. OMG. i sent a text to her while i was intoxicated last night! damn, so while i was at the club, i guess i got super drunk, because i sent the text to her without thinking. i said "i know that i've been immature and i can't change you or make things happen. i not bitter about anything now. i care about you and i only want the best for you, with or without me. so i'm sorry." was that bad?? 2
nevergoodenough Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 Don't send it, there is no point. Saying nothing is best 1
Author Wall E Posted November 30, 2013 Author Posted November 30, 2013 Man just do whatever you want. Obviously you don't listen to anyone here anyway. You just made yourself like a wimp sending that message. do i really look that bad? she wanted me to be happy for her tho.
chris21422 Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 Yes because when you broke up with someone. You don't remind her all your bad traits. Like saying sorry for being immature etc etc.. That is not gonna matter anymore when time goes by she will start to remember all the good times instead of the bad one's.. So if you keep reminding her that you are this wimp immature guy who can't let go of her. She is not gonna want you.. The best thing to do is just walk away be quiet and disappear and move on and if she comes back in the future good if not you still continue to move on. Man listen up and trust us here.. I've been on your shoes months ago.. I'm depress and so tempted to message her after the break up. I went on a club too the day after my break up and man all I wanted to do is message her "I will be always here for you" but I didn't. I started feeling better more and more the weeks goes by with No Contact and now the tables are turn she's the one who's messaging me and asking how I am and I am just ignoring her. So man up bro I know it's hard but listen to people here because they been on your shoes already.. do i really look that bad? she wanted me to be happy for her tho.
Haydn Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 Please try to listen. You have been given sage consul here by many experienced people. You cannot go on like this. She is laughing her head off at this point. Its like climbing a ladder without rungs. Your take the skin off in those hard to get places. Take care.
Letgo_ofme Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 My birthday is also coming up. Infact, my ex and I met 2 days before my birthday, so December is going to be a really big F*** you to my self esteem. Chin up man, go find some hobbies or call up some friends if you are worried about being alone. I make sure to text or call my friends when I am feeling like crap. You should do the same too!
fixing Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 You have completely ignored everyone in this thread. You're obviously going to keep calling her and pushing her further away. Your going to have to learn the hard way mate.
BC1980 Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 OMG. i sent a text to her while i was intoxicated last night! damn, so while i was at the club, i guess i got super drunk, because i sent the text to her without thinking. i said "i know that i've been immature and i can't change you or make things happen. i not bitter about anything now. i care about you and i only want the best for you, with or without me. so i'm sorry." was that bad?? She probably read that text and was feeling sorry for you. More likely than not, she doesn't care all that much. Just don't send anything else. I sent some stupid texts and a lame email to my ex after we broke up. I feel so mortified that I did those things, but we all learn. We all know how bad this is to go through, and we have all said and done things that made up look stupid. However, NC is now your best friend. It protects you from being hurt and from saying anymore nonsense. It is essential to healing. 1
Letgo_ofme Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 YES, it is bad. Because you've just shown her how immature and inconsiderate of her you are!!! You texted her because YOU are lonely. She is doing fine. And, if she requested her space (in not so many words), then you should have respected that. I'm sorry that you texted her, but you've just pushed her away even more. That's self sabotage....
fixing Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 Wally. Have you ever been in that horrible situation when a girl had a big crush on you, but you did not like her??? Its horrible, cringeworthy and very awkward when she kept trying to flirt and get your attention? You know that feeling right? Well, sadly, you have now reduced yourself to that awful clingy unwanted attention that your EX doesnt want.... NC from now and move on. 3
letsplaygofish2 Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 Your original post said that you wanted to show her that you've grown up and matured. However, your text shows her that you haven't grown up or matured. Infact, you've shown her that you're emotionally incapable of managing your feelings and you feel the need to reach out to her for support. I know that you're hurting, but you've just self-sabotaged the situation. Please stop contacting her! Call a friend, don't contact her. She will only pity you at this point... I'm sorry this sucks. 1
Yasuandio Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 That's called "Drunk Dialing." I almost warned you about it - and changed my mind. Now I'm pis't at myself. But some of us have to learn the hard way. I even read a very good e-book that warned me about Drunk Dialing - and I still did it, and made a total idiot out of myself. So you are not alone. Now I am going to give you another warning that I also should have given you based on personal experience. When my attorney and I were preparing for trial, she had a little surprise for me when I arrived on Sunday afternoon. The opposing council had sent over some tape recordings of my nasty voice mails they intended to use in Court the following day. They didn't use them - cause the content hurt his client - but it still scared the crap out of me for the 3 day trial. And I was also humiliated (I was in the anger phase when I did it, and my mother was dying - he had all the money, and I couldn't help her the way I wanted - but that is no excuse, Drunk Dialing calls only hurt YOU). I couldn't believe how I sounded on those recordings - it was like a split personality. Now - you may not be facing a divorce. But, if that girl doesn't want contact from you - then you best not call her when you have been drinking. You never know how you came off - cause you were "intoxicated.". You have no idea how she may have felt by receiving a call like that. She could perceive your call a number of ways, especially if you do it again. For example, she could think it is stupid or silly - let's hope for that. On the other hand, she could be concerned that you are getting weird, and it may have her worried about what you are going to do next (cause you have not repented her wishes - and are calling her drunk). Do you see my point? You cannot cross this line again. Done and done. One more time of this BS could get you perceived as stalkerish. Now stop it, and accept it. If you do it again, do be surprised if she doesn't collect evidence and you end up in trouble. You are way to hung up on this girl. There are four pages of advice - and help that I didn't have during my screw-ups. I wouldn't be surprised if you are driving past her house. If you are - you better STOP before it gets ugly. I hope this post wakes you up. Yas
ConfusedHumanBeing Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 OMG. i sent a text to her while i was intoxicated last night! damn, so while i was at the club, i guess i got super drunk, because i sent the text to her without thinking. i said "i know that i've been immature and i can't change you or make things happen. i not bitter about anything now. i care about you and i only want the best for you, with or without me. so i'm sorry." was that bad?? Yes...That was pretty bad. We've all made.mistakes so there isn't any reason to bash you or anything but that was probably the worst thing you can do Keep moving forward. 2
Author Wall E Posted November 30, 2013 Author Posted November 30, 2013 Wally. Have you ever been in that horrible situation when a girl had a big crush on you, but you did not like her??? Its horrible, cringeworthy and very awkward when she kept trying to flirt and get your attention? You know that feeling right? Well, sadly, you have now reduced yourself to that awful clingy unwanted attention that your EX doesnt want.... NC from now and move on. yes, as a matter of fact, it happened many times. girls would always flirt, ask for hugs, ask me to be their boyfriend, etc. it was creepy to me and pushed me away. i didn't want them. but i now know what you mean now, thats a good way of putting it. to tell you the truth, my ex stalked me, and wanted to get together, that's the only time i agreed to a girl who pushed me, because i'm way attracted to her and had a secret crush on her for years. 1
Sososad Posted November 30, 2013 Posted November 30, 2013 Did she respond to your drunk text ? And honestly how has the outcome made you feel?
Author Wall E Posted December 1, 2013 Author Posted December 1, 2013 Did she respond to your drunk text ? And honestly how has the outcome made you feel? no she didn't. i feel like i'm pointless. like i can't do anything right. but i feel there's hope that maybe she'll come around again if i just let go and forget about her. it's going to be tough with all the events coming up... my birthday, our anniversary date, christmas, new years, her birthday, valentines day.
Author Wall E Posted December 1, 2013 Author Posted December 1, 2013 Theres always a possibility. One thing is for sure, contact will keep pushing her away. After all, you can't miss someone who is always there, right? I'm not going to contact her. do you think she'll just forget about me? Do you think I still got a shot?
Yasuandio Posted December 1, 2013 Posted December 1, 2013 I mis-read your post and thought you called. Sorry for bitching you out like that. It was probably "Freidian" since I'm the one guilty of that druck dialing, and I was so scared you would do the same thing I projected. I do, again, sincerely apologize. Yas
Recommended Posts