1 year later...still bitter?

[Xiphias92]

Hey guys!

 

It's been a while since I posted on here; been loop-de-looping on life's wonderful things

 

Well I came back because of something that recently happened to me...now I haven't responded to this situation, but I would like some input from anyone.

 

About a few days ago, a friend of mine went through a terrible heartbreak in which his girlfriend had cheated on him. He went on Facebook and vented out his pain (non violently that is) on a post.

 

Well A year ago, I went through something like that. So I commented with "Hey Brothaman, I had something like this happen to me a year ago. Don't worry about her. Sometimes you lose something you thought was the best, but you end up finding much better over time."

 

A few days after that, I got on my Hotmail to check my horoscope. Turns out my ex messaged me Apparently she was p****d off that I was talking about our "private past" on Facebook. To make it even more strange, she blurts out in the email that she has friends keeping an eye on me, and that now she finally has something to say because I've been talking trash about her constantly...WTF?!?

 

It took me a while to think why she would write that if I've been strict NC since the day of the break-up, but I'm guessing she may have read the comment and got offended. What I do recall though, was that she went to pretty much anyone that came across her and spoke about the break-up.

But in no way was I trash talking about her.

 

It's been pretty much a year so why would she get offended?

Was my comment good/bad to write about even though it's just a past experience?

Should I write back? I'm sticking to my NC guns though.

 

For those who don't know my story, my ex cheated on me and made a whole story up that I mistreated/cheated/used/lied her. And she made posts about it on Facebook.

Edited September 26, 2013 by Xiphias92

[Philosoraptor]

She's still playing the victim. Showing the world her true colors is something she wants to avoid, so you showing them for her just pissed her off.

 

Delete the email and go back about living your happy life. She's not worth the energy.

[ConfusedHumanBeing]

Hey guys!

 

It's been a while since I posted on here; been loop-de-looping on life's wonderful things

 

Well I came back because of something that recently happened to me...now I haven't responded to this situation, but I would like some input from anyone.

 

About a few days ago, a friend of mine went through a terrible heartbreak in which his girlfriend had cheated on him. He went on Facebook and vented out his pain (non violently that is) on a post.

 

Well A year ago, I went through something like that. So I commented with "Hey Brothaman, I had something like this happen to me a year ago. Don't worry about her. Sometimes you lose something you thought was the best, but you end up finding much better over time."

 

A few days after that, I got on my Hotmail to check my horoscope. Turns out my ex messaged me Apparently she was p****d off that I was talking about our "private past" on Facebook. To make it even more strange, she blurts out in the email that she has friends keeping an eye on me, and that now she finally has something to say because I've been talking trash about her constantly...WTF?!?

 

It took me a while to think why she would write that if I've been strict NC since the day of the break-up, but I'm guessing she may have read the comment and got offended. What I do recall though, was that she went to pretty much anyone that came across her and spoke about the break-up.

But in no way was I trash talking about her.

 

It's been pretty much a year so why would she get offended?

Was my comment good/bad to write about even though it's just a past experience?

Should I write back? I'm sticking to my NC guns though.

 

For those who don't know my story, my ex cheated on me and made a whole story up that I mistreated/cheated/used/lied her. And she made posts about it on Facebook.

 

Hey brother. First, that sucks. You didnt do anything bad or wrong in that situation. Your comment was between you and your friend. She has NO right to get mad or upset at that. I see nothing wrong with it at all, especially since you were trying to help someone.

 

I'll throw in a small story here and maybe you can relate and understand. My ex broke up with me (3 year relationship) a year ago yesterday. She left, said she had issues to sort out and she swore she would come back to me yada yada. Turns out, there was another guy who she started to crush on. She left me for him, they didnt work out and now she is with guy #2. I have been in NC with her for about nine months.

 

I have a blog that I write online that is not secret or anything, but someone would have to do some DEEP digging to find it. I wrote a blog like two weeks ago just giving updates on my life. I wrote ONE sentence about how my ex BS'd me about her reasons for leaving. The blog was mostly positive though. So I check my e-mail like two days later and there is an email from her. It was like five paragraphs saying how she "stumbled upon my blog" and told me 1,000 things I "didnt do" in the relationship and how awful I was and "how happy" she is with guy #2 and how "he treats her like she wanted me to treat her" Just low-blows out of nowhere yet SHE cheated on ME. And I did EVERYTHING for her.

 

Moral of the story: I dont know WHY they do it, but this isn't the first story I've ever heard of this. It happens just as philo says. I wouldt take too much stock in it honestly and I defiantly wouldnt answer back because that is what she WANTS. There could be 1000 reasons why she wrote it, but my guess is that things arent going so well in her world so she is using this situation as something she can feel in control of and vent to. My .02 and I could be wrong, just an observation. I guess she feels like you are doing better than she is currently, so putting you down a peg makes her feel better. I hadnt looked on any social networks for a while, so I looked at my ex's twitter and she is STILL writing sad depressing tweets about guy #1 so obviously, things are not working out with new guy like she wants me to believe lol.

 

Just keep going forward and honestly, feel a tad good because you are obviously getting some sort of reaction out of her lol.

[Leegh]

I would not contact her, as it may just be opening "a can of worms". You sound great, but it sounds as if she needs to mature somewhat.

[Romaks]

She's still playing the victim. Showing the world her true colors is something she wants to avoid, so you showing them for her just pissed her off.

 

Delete the email and go back about living your happy life. She's not worth the energy.

 

I tend to fully agree with what Philosoraptor has to say, and he's definitely right.

 

She's too immature to even deal with, man. Move on.

 

 

Say, Philosoraptor, would you give your two cents on my thread; I've come to value your input. My thread

[harrybrown]

Keep in NC, and do not let her back into your life.

[Xiphias92]

Hey y'all!

 

Thanks for your replies! It means alot

 

I stuck to my NC guns...but now something else happened.

 

Last night, I began to receive some messages from a few of my friends (who are mutual friends with my ex) asking me if everything was alright and some on why was I still talking smack about my ex?

 

Turns out, my ex told her boyfriend about my comment and this guy decides to trash talk about me all over Facebook. I didn't check their profiles out nor did I ask my friends about what they exactly wrote.

Leegh! you were right about the can of worms! But I didn't open it.

 

Also, she sent me another e-mail...apparently she tried to Caps Lock me to death. However, this part of her e-mail caught my attention...

 

"Quit feeling sorry for yourself, quit talking and writing about me on Facebook and to anyone who crosses your path. For sure I did a long time ago. Recent statuses are being brought up about me so you stop this whole b******t! You're gum under my shoe! Good thing I did what I did deserved worse!"

 

 

(that last sentence was not a mistake, that's how it was written)

 

 

Honestly I don't have any anger over the e-mail nor has she even made me react over the Facebook status too.

 

Do I still stick to NC?

[lindsay1990]

I don't know. It's tricky because they are making you to be the insecure, hung up guy so I get that you might not want to hide out.

 

I would reply something but I don't know what. I do think a response is appropriate.

 

 

Something along the lines of "With this tacky spectacle you are showing now on a rather neutral comment, I have never been happier that you did what you did either. Get a hobby, and maybe some class and self-restraint."

 

 

But dooooon't listen to me. I am supremely confrontational. Wait to see what others say, ha.

[CptSaveAho]

ignore her....

 

shes just fishing for a response

[Xiphias92]

I don't know. It's tricky because they are making you to be the insecure, hung up guy so I get that you might not want to hide out.

 

I would reply something but I don't know what. I do think a response is appropriate.

 

 

Something along the lines of "With this tacky spectacle you are showing now on a rather neutral comment, I have never been happier that you did what you did either. Get a hobby, and maybe some class and self-restraint."

 

 

But dooooon't listen to me. I am supremely confrontational. Wait to see what others say, ha.

 

Ha ha well thanks Lindsay1990. I'd truly love to go confront her, but I think it's best if I stick to NC still. A friend of mine had pointed out to me that people will start to wonder why they're talking about me but I'm not talking about them on Facebook.