aisuru Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 No timeline? So is it still ok after 10 months?? In my opinion yes... However, you should probably be actively working through the stages of grief to some extent. AND, if needed, reach out for professional resources if you feel it will help.
Author kameron Posted May 30, 2013 Author Posted May 30, 2013 This is what I sent her what do you guys think. Idk if you got my messages ana I think you blocked my number and facebook. I just want to apologize for how selfish I have been throuout this breakup. I have acted in ways I wouldn't normally act because my heart is broken. Not an excuse. You deserve to be happy anastasia and I have been selfish by not excepting your wishes. You have every right to break up with Me. I was just in an emotional state of mind. I wish you would unblock me and we could become friends. I take back what i said about no contact so you can realize what you lost. That was an immature statement coming from my broken heart. The truth is it doesnt matter your happy and that's all that matters. I am beginning to lose feelings for you therefore I am able to talk to you in a more rational manner. I do accept the breakup ana I know nothing I say or do will ever bring you back I just need to except that. I just don't want bad blood between us you were a very important perons in my life.
mtnbiker3000 Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 This is what I sent her what do you guys think. Idk if you got my messages ana I think you blocked my number and facebook. I just want to apologize for how selfish I have been throuout this breakup. I have acted in ways I wouldn't normally act because my heart is broken. Not an excuse. You deserve to be happy anastasia and I have been selfish by not excepting your wishes. You have every right to break up with Me. I was just in an emotional state of mind. I wish you would unblock me and we could become friends. I take back what i said about no contact so you can realize what you lost. That was an immature statement coming from my broken heart. The truth is it doesnt matter your happy and that's all that matters. I am beginning to lose feelings for you therefore I am able to talk to you in a more rational manner. I do accept the breakup ana I know nothing I say or do will ever bring you back I just need to except that. I just don't want bad blood between us you were a very important perons in my life. Meh... Shouldn't have sent that. Oh well, damage is done now... 1
Coping Vortex Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 I agree with you vortex on everything you said. But see this situation is a little different this guy she is with isn't new its her ex boyfriend of 3 years you see she broke up with him for me because she was unhappy then 2 years later left me for him again because she missed him.I was a much better boyfriend then he was. Thats y I'm so confused. I think she likes the newness of her old relationship but is soon going to realize why she was unhappy with him in the first place. Well those goes to exactly what I said in my post. Plus the fact you were NOT the better BF. Its simple and trust me it took me awhile to get this through my head as well. She chose him. Period. I felt like you I was the better BF I did so much for my ex. My ex even told me I was more affectionate, better in bed, better to talk to, I'm way more successful, more personable etc.. Guess who she is with? That's right him. You have to understand YOU believe that about you. but she doesn't or she would be with you. trust me on paper my ex should be with me. There is no reason for her not to.......except she is not. Once you stop telling yourself you are better you will start to heal. Like I said it sucks, I know I am still devastated after 6 months. There is part of me hoping she will pop up and text me. She did off and on during the first 4 months, but it was all breadcrumbs. I know you don't think we know your situation, but you will soon realize its very very typical. And you are right she may find the old issues are still there once she does she will move on again. She is confused, she might even contact you again but trust me it will probably be temporary. trust me breadcrumbs will do a lot of damage to your psyche. We are just trying to help you. I know we all seem so negative but we have all been through it here. Trust me. She knows how to get in touch with you. Move on for now. And be careful if she does contact you. I know I am trying to still do that after 6 months.
Coping Vortex Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 This is what I sent her what do you guys think. Idk if you got my messages ana I think you blocked my number and facebook. I just want to apologize for how selfish I have been throuout this breakup. I have acted in ways I wouldn't normally act because my heart is broken. Not an excuse. You deserve to be happy anastasia and I have been selfish by not excepting your wishes. You have every right to break up with Me. I was just in an emotional state of mind. I wish you would unblock me and we could become friends. I take back what i said about no contact so you can realize what you lost. That was an immature statement coming from my broken heart. The truth is it doesnt matter your happy and that's all that matters. I am beginning to lose feelings for you therefore I am able to talk to you in a more rational manner. I do accept the breakup ana I know nothing I say or do will ever bring you back I just need to except that. I just don't want bad blood between us you were a very important perons in my life. No!!! At the most you should have asked her to talk to you then discuss your issues via phone or in person at best. And that is it. Do not pour your heart out in a text or email. At best you shouldn't have sent anything. You look too desperate now. I know because I have done it. I know you are hurting but you have to keep your wits about you right now. Do not send anything else for now. You put it out there let her come to you if she wants she knows how to contact you.
mtnbiker3000 Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 Why shouldnt I have sent that. Because she doesn't care and you just lost all self-respect and dignity... 4
StarsOnFire Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 Why shouldnt I have sent that. Because it was a lie. You're obviously not over her or the breakup and you are STILL hoping she "realizes what she lost". 2
Author kameron Posted May 30, 2013 Author Posted May 30, 2013 I felt I needed her to know that. I was acting selfish and immature. Begging for her back and so on. I wanted her to know I respected her decision
mtnbiker3000 Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 I felt I needed her to know that. I was acting selfish and immature. Begging for her back and so on. I wanted her to know I respected her decision Again, you care... she doesn't!! 1
Author kameron Posted May 30, 2013 Author Posted May 30, 2013 So what your saying is I should just stop caring cut all contact. Remove her from my life. 2
aisuru Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 I felt I needed her to know that. I was acting selfish and immature. Begging for her back and so on. I wanted her to know I respected her decision Ummm, sending her that was selfish and immature too. You're just reinforcing to her that she made the correct decision. You don't respect her decision. You don't like her decision. You are trying to manipulate her in to returning to you I wish you could see that. You told her "I am beginning to lose feelings for you therefore I am able to talk to you in a more rational manner." which is a lie, and manipulative. That's why you shouldn't have sent this to her. It's just gonna make you feel worse, whether she responds or not. She doesn't want you in her life. Time to accept it. 1
aisuru Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 So what your saying is I should just stop caring cut all contact. Remove her from my life. this x 1,000,000,000
Author kameron Posted May 30, 2013 Author Posted May 30, 2013 I do respect her decision. I don't agree with the way she went about doing it. She hasn't given me any closure. She just sorta left and went with her ex without explaining anything. I said so are we over she says I guess so. I say are you dating your ex she says I guess so.
Hockeyguy19 Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 Why shouldnt I have sent that. You don't want to be her friend, that's why. Trust me and everyone on here. It's not going to work and you'll never heal. You are bouncing between anger, pain, denial and acceptance. You need to process this, all of it. It sucks, it hurts, you want to cry, fight and run all at the same time. It's normal. But stop. Stop emailing, texting etc, it's driving her further away and making you crazy. Let her live her life, her decisions. You live your life and focus on improving you. Start small, go for a walk, leave your phone at home. Get sunlight and air. You will get through this and past her, but you need to accept that it's done, forever. No what ifs, no well maybe I can do.., none of that. You will drive yourself bat **** crazy doing that. Just let her go man, I've been there, done all the wrong things, they get you no where but into a deeper hole, it's time to crawl out. 1
mtnbiker3000 Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 I do respect her decision. I don't agree with the way she went about doing it. She hasn't given me any closure. She just sorta left and went with her ex without explaining anything. I said so are we over she says I guess so. I say are you dating your ex she says I guess so. Please spend some time reading posts around here. You will see this dissected so many times by so many people. Nothing new here. Read, read, and read some more...
Author kameron Posted May 30, 2013 Author Posted May 30, 2013 She has told me a couple days ago that she just wants to live her life. What does that mean
Hockeyguy19 Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 I do respect her decision. I don't agree with the way she went about doing it. She hasn't given me any closure. She just sorta left and went with her ex without explaining anything. I said so are we over she says I guess so. I say are you dating your ex she says I guess so. You don't have to agree with it, it was her decision. You need to live with it, and know that your not going to get closer. Some do not give it, but you have to find it yourself. She's gone, that's all the closure you need. Move on with YOUR life, I'm telling you man, YOU have to accept this. It's not easy but you can do it, when you start, that's up to you. 1
aisuru Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 I do respect her decision. I don't agree with the way she went about doing it. She hasn't given me any closure. She just sorta left and went with her ex without explaining anything. I said so are we over she says I guess so. I say are you dating your ex she says I guess so. She doesn't owe you closure. Guess who does? 1
Hockeyguy19 Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 She has told me a couple days ago that she just wants to live her life. What does that mean Umm exactly that. She wants to live HER life, and indirectly wants YOU to live YOURS. That's a nice way if saying I'm moving on from you, and you should do the same. She wants to do her thing without you, that's the controlling feeling she got from you, she wants to feel 100% in control of her life, without you in it. 1
Author kameron Posted May 30, 2013 Author Posted May 30, 2013 Ugh this is the worst feeling in the world. She moved her ex into our home the day after she left me. The reason she gave me for leaving me was that she missed him and never stopped having feelings for him. Ughhhhhhh who does this.
Hockeyguy19 Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 Ugh this is the worst feeling in the world. She moved her ex into our home the day after she left me. The reason she gave me for leaving me was that she missed him and never stopped having feelings for him. Ughhhhhhh who does this. People, men and women. Everyday unfortunately. Your not the only one, were here man. It's ****ty, it the worse feeling ever. But it gets better. Just trust us.
Author kameron Posted May 30, 2013 Author Posted May 30, 2013 I can understand if I was mean to her and treated her bad but I didn't I was good to her. Therefore I don't understand.
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