toc200 Posted April 11, 2013 Posted April 11, 2013 So it's getting very close to the day that my ex gf leaves our small town and flies home to the other side of the country. I don't know if I'm getting better or worse. I keep romanticizing what the relationship was. We've hung out since the break up and tried to be as amicable as possible. It sort of worked. I bumped into her today. She said she's ready to leave this town. Part of me wants her gone too because I run into her everywhere. Another part of me thinks how can I quite possibly never see my first real love ever again in my life? She wants to see me one last time before she goes. I don't know if I should. My dad and counsellor say no but I don't know if I'm strong enough to withhold this desire. I want to tell her that I recognize my faults. That I realize what I must do in my next relationship. I want to tell her that I would have been a better man. Because she definitely had faults, and so did I. How do I know we made the right decision for us to go separate. Maybe a break would have made us realize what we had. I'm living two lives right now. One wants to move on but can't for several reasons that I've identified with my counsellor, I'm holding onto memories, I have a performance anxiety that I anticipate will cause issues with new women in the future; sort of a fear of rejection. The other half of me wants her to tell me this was all a big joke, or I just wake up from this nightmare. He is truly not over her yet. I guess the distance would help silent this man but he just can't face not having her in his life in some facet. But he's bound to be broken when she moves on before him and finds out. But try to tell him that.. Don't we all just hate this little guy. So LS, before I write another novel, what do you suggest with your infinite knowledge. Should I text her how I felt in the 2nd paragraph? Meet her and say nothing? What can I do for closure? The messed up thing is that this girl knows me so well and I'm so comfortable with her I could almost feel comfortable asking her how to get over her. FML This all seems so ridiculous for a break up that wasn't the nicest. More info on that can be found here if you need a deeper insight. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/coping/381000-she-s-leaving-hurts
hannah11 Posted April 11, 2013 Posted April 11, 2013 Just let her go. Don't text her, don't show up to say good bye. There is no real closure that you can get. If you see her and talk to her then everything will just seem even more in the open. Ever notice how the hardest 'goodbyes' are the ones that you know you will probably never say 'hello' to again? It is good to listen to your heart and let people know how you feel, but sometimes to protect your heart you have to give it some time to heal before you risk breaking it again.
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