Hated because I'm fine with Entry level low job?

[sb129]

As long as the money is there, what's it to her? He has money, he goes off somewhere for 8 hours a day that's all there is to it.

 

So many things wrong with this statement.

 

I would have a huge problem if the money was coming from say, organised crime.

Would YOU be ok with your partner working 8 days a day earning good money in a mystery job that happened to be prostutition? Shes still bringing home the bacon right? Whats a little omission of truth between partners?

 

Oh come on! So if your wife or girlfriend says "do I look fat in this dress?" you're going to answer honestly? .

 

HUGE difference between that and where your income comes from.

 

Well, I've never cheated, never hooked up or used a girl for sex. Nor have I ever committed any acts of domestic violence. So, as far as I'm concerned I'm an amazing person.

 

Entry level male, not much to set you apart from the rest there really.

 

Those aren't mutually exclusive. Say you won $50 million after taxes. House and warehouse lets say combined $1 million (for example). You could live pretty comfortably for years. Including vacations and a nest egg for retirement.

 

I would get bored out of my brain. I'm female btw. And I work in a highly paid profession. My H set up his own business a couple of years back and its done pretty well- his business is his passion and his drive and ambition have lead to his success- and yes, its attractive. Among other things.

 

It does if they start to expect it. It doesn't take much to start a chain reaction that can't be stopped.

 

All they need is that one small taste. That is why I'm being so strict on it. Parents doesn't realize just how little it takes before the child gets addicted to it.

You can provide luxuries for your children without them being spoiled- its called discipline.

My daughter is "spoiled" by your definitions- she has a bookcase crammed with books, good quality clothes, toys she loves, and alot of attention from us.

 

Yet she is still made to behave and use her manners. She is still expected to help out with household chores. Whining, tantrums and bad behaviour are not tolerated, and she is disciplined accordingly by removal of privileges if her behaviour isn't up to scratch.

 

Not all children whose parents make decent money are spoiled.

[fortyninethousand322]

So many things wrong with this statement.

 

I would have a huge problem if the money was coming from say, organised crime.

Would YOU be ok with your partner working 8 days a day earning good money in a mystery job that happened to be prostutition? Shes still bringing home the bacon right? Whats a little omission of truth between partners?

 

:lmao:

 

I specifically said in this thread that it's not like lying about being in the mafia or something intrinsically immoral.

 

 

HUGE difference between that and where your income comes from.

 

Again, as long as it's not criminal, who cares?

 

 

Entry level male, not much to set you apart from the rest there really.

 

There are a whole lot of men who have cheated or committed acts of domestic violence. I wouldn't go so far as to say a majority, but a whole bunch. The fact that I haven't done any of that puts me in a pretty good position compared to many men.

 

Plus, I've fathered no illegitimate children and I'm completely clean. Extra bonus points right there.

 

I would get bored out of my brain. I'm female btw. And I work in a highly paid profession. My H set up his own business a couple of years back and its done pretty well- his business is his passion and his drive and ambition have lead to his success- and yes, its attractive. Among other things.

 

Again, I hypothetical about how one could hide the fact that they didn't have a job but were wealthy because they won the Mega Millions or something like that.

 

Personally, I'd build a giant wooden sailboat and travel the world. Be the first person to circumnavigate the globe...or something.

 

And I'm glad you have a great job. I have things that I am passionate about, but thus far those things haven't done me much good as far as making money is concerned.

[kaylan]

OP, how the hell are you ever gonna afford to have your own place on such a meager wage? You cant expect to ride someone elses coattails forever bro. Poverty aint fun either....and 300 bucks a week is near that ole poverty line.

[Driftking102]

Because many women (especially online dating) are looking for the "total package".

 

Someone who is tall, good-looking, intelligent, makes a decent living, has aspirations and "potential" to provide security and a comfortable/decent lifestyle, especially if they desire kids. Respectable, charming, honest...man with pride-integrity...basically the "perfect man".

 

Why would they describe a guy who is like this;

 

Short, ugly, stupid, dead end job, lazy and/or lacks motivation, dependent, no aspirations/goals/ideas. Dirt-bag, incompetent, doesn't know how to treat a woman, disrespectful, gross, direct with no class, dishonest, no conscience.

 

Men don't ask for much......to get laid!

 

But for a relationship, most men have pretty moderate expectations if they've got any desirability or standard to themselves.

 

Yet, understandably there are men out there that are just looking for that middle-of-the-road decent woman....well look at the above lists, you probably lack more than a few qualities in what many women in general are looking for.

 

Women see the "potential" in a man or a man that is already there...so older guys that got their lives together and have a steady job/income, semi-successful or stable...would be a huge attractive quality to many.

 

Or men who have that potential or well on their way...especially younger or has been through some ups and downs can be reasonable or tolerable for some time being.

 

However for a guy who's barely making ends meet and essentially just take care of himself? c'mon now...really? that's not going to be the most attractive quality to women, especially if you're going for women who have put time and investment into their careers and being successful...they're typically going to be looking for someone who can provide the same...UNLESS you have something else to offer, so do you?

 

Probably not, so if you're just the average guy that lacks of a lot of other qualities PLUS you don't make any money or settling for very little in your life...you tell me why that is going to be appealing? you tell me why that is something women are going to be LOOKING for?.

 

Otherwise takes those lists of "demands" as you may see them, merely as guidelines to someone they are looking for, it is an "ideal" partner...not everything they absolutely need to have or demand...most will not get the perfect man, but they're going to try.

 

There are plenty of women that aren't as demanding or have very high expectations on the superficial front as other women...so just find them, however online dating is a meat market and a place where many people are wishful thinking. You shouldn't take it so personal, it's easy just to see people as faces and as a statistic, they don't know you or have any emotions invested, that's the nature of online dating, it can be very cut-throat and cold.

 

I've found that women don't want stoners either. Stoners are people who sit on the couch all the time and play xbox. That's why my girl loves me so much is because I'm successful at what I do and I am going to college to get a bachelors degree and have only been at my entry level job for almost two years. I don't plan on staying there forever. As soon as I get my bachelors degree I am outta there. Being only 23 and having motivation is a big plus to many women. Guys who just sit around and get stoned don't end up in relationships.

 

If I were you, I would move out of that entry level position and get more money. Who doesn't want to make more money? More money = more fun especially if you have someone to share it with.

[Driftking102]

 

COme on! What do men ask of women? Nothing much!

Most men just want a woman who is decently slim and pretty(which most are) and they don't care about what kind of job they do.

 

 

Personally I look for women who have personality. I am dating this one girl right now who is the most beautiful girl on the planet. She may not be attractive to most, but to me shes beautiful. I always make sure shes beautiful by telling her everyday that she is. You need to get better social circles my friend if you think all men think this way. I am a man and I do not think this way. I'm only 23 and almost have my bachelors and am gonna get out of this entry level job. I am not sure how old you are, but you need to start achieving stuff if you plan on getting women.

[sb129]

 

I specifically said in this thread that it's not like lying about being in the mafia or something intrinsically immoral.

Again, as long as it's not criminal, who cares? .

 

OK I missed that bit- you do skim read a bit when there are 7 pages to get through.

 

Even so- a good partnership shouldn't have secrets.

Especially something as big as how you make a living. I'd rather know where the money was coming from- I like knowing important things about my partner so I know them and love them for their whole true self.

 

I'm not even sure how you could manage to carry on such a deception long term.

 

Secrets breed mistrust and resentment, which isn't a good basis for a successful long term R.

 

Some people may not have a problem with that scenario, but I would. If I didnt' actually know where the money was coming from, I would probably worry that is WAS being gained illegally.

[chex]

According to all the women in this site AND in dating sites I am useless/worthless just because i dont mind being in a entry level low job all my life.

 

I dont understand that thinking.

 

But it just goes to show that Women don't really like men. They just wanna be with men who are of one kind. Men who talk a specific way, Men who live the in some specific way.

 

like "A Professional making so and so money, who has time and money to do luxurious traveling and all this activities and stuff. Who can stimulate me intellectually"

 

COme on! What do men ask of women? Nothing much!

Most men just want a woman who is decently slim and pretty(which most are) and they don't care about what kind of job they do.

 

For example i used to get 300$ a week in my temp job. So what?

that's enough for me to live. ANd then the woman does her work. and gets her own money in her job so why would she care about how much money i make if i'm fine with it?

 

Most men are that "specific way"; look around. Exactly as many men as women are in heterosexual monamorous relationships(I assume this is what you want.)

 

Why are you fine with an entry level job? DONT YOU WANT A LITTLE TASTE OF THE GLORY?

 

As an extension, I sure as hell wouldn't be fine with a woman who wants to live a completely average, deadbeat life.

[chex]

A 5-year old doesn't need anything other than a book to start reading/learning, the clothes on his/her back, the shoes on his/her feet, and food/water and a lot of sleep to help it stay alive.

 

And MAYBE some toys to keep it entertained but I doubt it is necessary by any means.

 

Any more than that is strictly a luxury the child can do without.

 

No human interaction? you know, the brain doesn't fully develop without human interaction.

[fortyninethousand322]

OK I missed that bit- you do skim read a bit when there are 7 pages to get through.

 

Even so- a good partnership shouldn't have secrets.

Especially something as big as how you make a living. I'd rather know where the money was coming from- I like knowing important things about my partner so I know them and love them for their whole true self.

 

I'm not even sure how you could manage to carry on such a deception long term.

 

Secrets breed mistrust and resentment, which isn't a good basis for a successful long term R.

 

Some people may not have a problem with that scenario, but I would. If I didnt' actually know where the money was coming from, I would probably worry that is WAS being gained illegally.

 

Well, there are some things I'd hide about myself until I could be reasonably assured the woman in question wouldn't run away after finding out. That would probably be one of those things.

 

Of course the other issue is her finding out, marrying me, then killing me and somehow getting away with it so she could inherit the money. It's a fine line I suppose.

[sb129]

Well, there are some things I'd hide about myself until I could be reasonably assured the woman in question wouldn't run away after finding out. That would probably be one of those things.

 

Of course the other issue is her finding out, marrying me, then killing me and somehow getting away with it so she could inherit the money. It's a fine line I suppose.

 

 

I hope you're kidding about the last part....!!!

 

Isn't one of the first things people ask eachother when they first meet is what they do for a job?

 

This isn't Undercover Boss...

[fortyninethousand322]

I hope you're kidding about the last part....!!!

 

Isn't one of the first things people ask eachother when they first meet is what they do for a job?

 

This isn't Undercover Boss...

 

No, I wasn't kidding. You'd be surprised what people do to other people. It can be a nasty world out there if you don't protect yourself.

 

And yeah that's probably one of the first things people ask. But I'd personally make something up that sounded believable. And then tell the truth when it became necessary or when I trusted her.

 

But, let's be honest, this is all speculative and hypothetical. I haven't won the lottery (unfortunately) and I'm not likely to, neither are most people reading this.

 

Right now I have a job. Except it pays 0 dollars a year. For now.

[outsidethebox]

I prefer to answer honestly but not insulting.

 

So if I do think she looks fat in that dress, I will say it.

 

Clearly you have not tried that.

[sb129]

No, I wasn't kidding. You'd be surprised what people do to other people. It can be a nasty world out there if you don't protect yourself.

 

And yeah that's probably one of the first things people ask. But I'd personally make something up that sounded believable. And then tell the truth when it became necessary or when I trusted her.

 

But, let's be honest, this is all speculative and hypothetical. I haven't won the lottery (unfortunately) and I'm not likely to, neither are most people reading this.

 

Right now I have a job. Except it pays 0 dollars a year. For now.

 

I think I would rather make my own money than win the lottery. I never buy tickets so definitely not going to happen!

 

I'm pretty happy with where H and I are financially right now. I don't think winning millions of dollars would necessarily be a good thing for us. We live in a location and a house that we love, we get to provide for our kids and get a few luxuries a year.

 

I like that we've earned it ourselves and that we have goals for it and ourselves and that we are setting a good example for our children. We're also in a similar bracket to the majority of our friends and family which is good.

 

You read all sorts of stories about people winning the lottery and pretty much falling apart because they have no idea how to handle the money and then become isolated from their friends and family.

[SJC2008]

Most women who make the same or less than you won't have a problem with how much money you make. When I'm done with school I'll be making $35-40$k a year so I won't be expecting women who make a lot more than that to date me and I'm fine with that.

[mortensorchid]

In this economy, one must be greatful for whatever they have. If the women around you are not pleased with your job (whatever it is that they do), you are not with the right women who will love you no matter what the case is.

 

I have struggled with this myself. I have been with men in the past who have either had entry level or below average jobs, or they have been unemployed for a while. I'm ok with it, I mean, it's because you should love the person for who they are not how much money they make.

[sb129]

I'm ok with it, I mean, it's because you should love the person for who they are not how much money they make.

 

Thats a simplistic way of looking at it- but often people are attracted to other people that have certain characteristics and that they can share goals with.

 

Its not all about money and dollar values per se.

 

Many people make nothing as they build businesses and dreams- but I would find that more attractive than someone that coasts along in a low paid job for years on end with no thought to where life is taking them.

 

At least the first person has dreams, goals, a desire AND actions to make them happen. Personally- thats attractive to me. It might not be to others.

 

Thats what I love about my husband- he had a vision and he spent thousands of hours building and creating his business from the bottom up. Its made money- more than we'd hoped, but most importantly has allowed him to express his ideas and creativity and he is a happier person being his own boss. THAT is the attractive part. And that he didn't ever lose faith in his vision despite naysayers and lack of support from people who he should have been able to count on.

 

He could make three times as much doing a different job but be utterly miserable and unfulfilled.

[ltjg45]

You can provide luxuries for your children without them being spoiled- its called discipline.

 

What they say they have and what they are capable of doing are two different things.

 

You can provide luxuries for your children without them being spoiled- its called discipline.

 

My daughter is "spoiled" by your definitions- she has a bookcase crammed with books, good quality clothes, toys she loves, and alot of attention from us.

 

1. Bookcase crammed with books = not spoiled.

2. Good quality clothes = not spoiled

3. Toys she loves = not spoiled unless she has more than she can play with.

4. A lot of attention from the parents = definitely not spoiled.

 

She needs those things except MAYBE the toys and that's just a big maybe. This is not what I'm talking about.

 

Yet she is still made to behave and use her manners. She is still expected to help out with household chores. Whining, tantrums and bad behaviour are not tolerated, and she is disciplined accordingly by removal of privileges if her behaviour isn't up to scratch.

 

That is because you never gave her anything she wants and doesn't need.

 

You didn't give her a cell phone like the sheer majority of middle-school kids have, you didn't give her a vehicle in high school without her having to earn it.

 

So I'm not surprised that she is turning out the way you expected.

 

Not all children whose parents make decent money are spoiled.

 

Actions speak louder than words. I dare say, through their offspring's actions, many parents failed in that regard and is too arrogant or stubborn to admit it.

 

A child doesn't need toys. A child also doesn't NEED books.

 

To survive, a child would need food, shelter, clothing.

 

So you promote stupidity?

 

Is that the message that you are trying to tell me?

 

Do you think children in poverty stricken Africa have books and toys? I don't find one thing wrong with giving a child a "want" on special occasions. Especially if I can afford it. I will be proud, and so happy that I'm financially able to do that.

 

So, in order words, it's just to make you happy that you can do this and not be concerned what this may do to your child's way of thinking later on down the line.

 

This goes back to what I said before: Parents thinking they did a suitable job raising their kids and then be shocked when their child turns to their true colors when they least expect it. After that, they are wondering what went wrong.

 

Oh no, that won't be happening to my kids. I'm not falling in that mind trap. If they want something, they earn it. That goes from a candy bar to their college education.

 

Nothing in life is free. This is a cruel world that is not getting any nicer. My kids will know that from day one.

[ltjg45]

No human interaction? you know, the brain doesn't fully develop without human interaction.

 

I did leave that out, didn't I?

 

My apologies then. The child will get a lot of that.

[Els]

Typical "you're shallow because your requirements are different from my requirements (which are totally okay, unlike yours)" thread.

 

BTW, what happened to the lesbian chinese women you were interested in?

[ltjg45]

Typical "you're shallow because your requirements are different from my requirements (which are totally okay, unlike yours)" thread.

 

BTW, what happened to the lesbian chinese women you were interested in?

 

Are you referring this to anyway?

[Treasa]

You've been here since 2005 and you consider that base level?

 

You have really high standards. Comparatively speaking of course.

 

I started in 2005. And no, up until last year I didn't have high standards. However, I don't post here asking for help.

 

I've never had a problem getting a man or a woman.

[El Brujo]

Well, if he's not and that's how he thinks, it's his problem, not any of ours. It's sad how people waste their lives on such ignorance, and negativity, but it doesn't hurt my life so, whaaattever.

 

Likewise.

 

Anyone can be as hot as they want online, but nothing puts their fire out like going to a meetup and trying to pretend they're Mr. Sly Guy.

[Hopeful30]

You shouldn't be hated for it, but alot of women aren't happy with having a man with that job AND they arent happy having a man who doesn't want MORE.

 

Women, in general, want amibitious men. Ambition, in my opinion, is very attractive in a guy. If a guy is satisfied with having so little (so little as in if the woman thinks your job is "low") then she isn't likely to date you.

 

I think some women also feel insecure about it. As in, "if hes happy with such a **** job of COURSE he will be all over a woman like me". A lot of women think like this. It's more of a compliment when an ambitious man who only wants the best goes after them, because they feel better automatically since it's a "higher" man who wants them.

 

Just my two cents.

[soccerrprp]

I agree with everything you said EXCEPT this.

 

One of the biggest issues we have in the U.S. is that parents is spoiling children. This is how we have to deal with entitled, spoiled brats thinking that everything should be given to them without question.

 

This is why President Obama (also knows as the Welfare President) has a 2nd term of office. How glorious it is for us.

 

 

WOW! I had to respond to this nonsense!

 

American children are regarded as spoiled, but this occurred LONG before Obama came into office. Both people from the RIGHT and LEFT are equally guilty of this and has nothing to do with politics.

 

But since you injected politics, it is clear that you are hostile to Obama. It is also clear that you and your choice Romney were and are out of touch. You call him the welfare president, so I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt and believe you also mean welfare given to large corporations, the rich, etc. Entitlements, right?

 

What politician in your preferred circle was planning to tackle these types of entitlements? Welfare?

 

I would love to hear your reasons for calling Obama the Welfare president. It's likely you'll mention healthcare reform, taxes that much of the middle class and lower don't pay (existed long before he came into office and perpetuated by Bush Jr.)...Obama is less than perfect, but have you been keeping up with the waste, corruption over the past 20+ years from both sides? Likely not...

[soccerrprp]

You shouldn't be hated for it, but alot of women aren't happy with having a man with that job AND they arent happy having a man who doesn't want MORE.

 

Women, in general, want amibitious men. Ambition, in my opinion, is very attractive in a guy. If a guy is satisfied with having so little (so little as in if the woman thinks your job is "low") then she isn't likely to date you.

 

I think some women also feel insecure about it. As in, "if hes happy with such a **** job of COURSE he will be all over a woman like me". A lot of women think like this. It's more of a compliment when an ambitious man who only wants the best goes after them, because they feel better automatically since it's a "higher" man who wants them.

 

Just my two cents.

 

Apologizing for my earlier post...sorry all. Couldn't let such bias and vitriolic enmity go w/o some response.

 

Anyway, this post got me thinking...

 

What if a guy or woman has a job he/she loves? Let's say that the degree of ambition that that job allows for is mostly parallel advancement, but it's clear that he/she is doing more to contribute to the workplace b/c he/she loves what he/she does. Would this be enough for such ladies?

 

Does there have to be promotions, advancement w/ pay to show that a guy is ambitious? Or does ambition also include being active, creative, etc. ?