2 guy friend-mixed signals-

[Ashlyn]

Ugh! So I have 2 guy friends(Matt and Steven) who I became friends with at the same time. Back story, they have known each other for more than 10 yrs. And are best friends and roommates. Then there is me.

 

With Matt we became closer than I was with Steven bc he went away for business for a cpl months and we barely kept in touch then. so we literally became best friends in his absense. Matt also got a gf during this period of time while Steven was away but we remained very close. By close I mean he initiated all contact, calls, txts, emails, facebook messages. And we were hanging out about 4 times a week, even though he had a gf- sometimes she would be there sometimes she wouldn't. Our friendship was never a secret.

 

Fast forward to now... Stevens back. We are all best friends. Neither has a gf. At times I have confused feelings for both.... Yeah not ok. In the beginning all I wanted was friendship as we have all grown closer there are qualities that I like about both of them and sometimes I think of them in more than friend ways but its a fleeting feeling.

 

While I feel this way I feel as though both have shown me major signs of interest and I just blow it off. They are very opposite in their approaches with me. While Matt initiates with all contact and wants to hang allll the time. Steven and I rarely communicate or its 99% less than I talk w Matt. We all usually hang out bc Matt initiates it or we just run into each other at places we frequent. But they both call me their best friends when we are all hanging together its just strange that he never really initiates contact. He does initiate some on social media but. Anyway I also always fight with Steven. Always. He tries to get under my skin and it works like no other. It was so ridiculous that another friend witnessed one fight and afterwards she wanted to know if I had feelings for him bc she didn't understand why I got so mad at what he said. Tho when I explained it she understood why I was mad and she's a close friend of both of ours and she said she understands why we fight.... Bc we have the exact same personality. When she started bringing up what she meant it did make sense. Maybe we butt heads bc we are so alike and that makes me sort of have a the smallest of crushes on him..... Sometimes. Most of the time though I just see him as a friend...

 

Then there is Matt. He tries to annoy me as most men or guy friends do to their friends or people they really like. He's well traveled and he tells me things like "unfortunately I like you more than most people I know" he has made up a thousand and 1 nicknames for me and just takes most things overboard when it comes to me. He can't go more than a day wo making some form of contact with me. We all still hang out all the time. The amount and frequency that he contacts me sometimes throws me off. I mean we obviously all love spending time together but even for best friends its a little excessive.

 

I have had close guy friends before but never like this. 2 guys who are already friends and I'm the only girl they actually like hanging out with. We have a few other friends we hang out with when we really want to hang out but they are also men.

 

Here is the weirdest part: Matt will say things about how me and Steven need to hook up.... Right in front of us. We both just sit there silent. So maybe Matt has no interest or he's just trying to see what ill say. I don't know he definitely wants some kind of reaction. People have said to me on separate occasions that they think 1 or the other has a crush on me. Why are male female relationships so ridiculous?! Like I said I've had close guy friends before but I guess maybe I wasn't ever attracted to them like that. I probably sound like a little slore(slut/whore) but I'm not at all. Just conflicted.

 

Last night Matt and I were hanging out and as I was leaving he walked me to his door. Usually I see myself out but he followed me then he was like "hey" I was abt to close the door and I said what slowly shutting the door and he said "be safe"..... What?! U followed me downstairs to say be safe?! No way. I was slightly intoxicated but I think he was abt to go in for a kiss if I wouldn't have been shutting the door... I don't know. Sometimes I think I'm overthinking and sometimes I'm just like its obvious they are both into me and they both know it so neither one tries to take it further. What the heck did I get myself into? Does this make any sense? Help!