Taramere Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 (edited) Even on an anonymous message board, it's still real people who read it and I would prefer not to be that person who constantly dishes out negativity for others to soak up like sponges. It's selfish, and I think the more people do it online, the more it will start to seep out into their real life personas and become an entrenched part of who they are. If somebody is in such a bad way that they're thinking of doing something stupid then definitely they need to reach out to somebody, but I don't really believe the kind of endless venting about the same old issues serves any valid purpose. It's hard not to do, and I think we can all fall into it in certain circumstances or (for example) when a news story breaks about an issue we feel passionately about. As far as I am aware, though, the therapeutic professions see venting as an unhelpful thing that ends up only entrenching destructive thinking rather than "detoxifying" the individual of negativity as they may think they're doing. I tend to just have the most toxic posters on ignore. It's actually only a very tiny minority, since I feel most people have their positives and negatives which inevitably vary according to mood and personal circumstances. There are a lot of amusing, interesting people on here. There are one or two, though, who never seem to have anything positive or uplifting to contribute. I think minimising your exposure to people like that is an important part of avoiding becoming like them. Edited January 27, 2013 by Taramere 2
xxoo Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 By age 30 to 35 (my age range)? Yes. Hundreds. Smack dab average. 5'4", 120 lbs, fairly fit, white with an average face who gets about to bars, went to high school and college and was not a total wallflower, and has had a few jobs, maybe served as a waitress or bartender along the way. Hundreds. They all count. Any time a guy on the street, in the bar, in the club, on the bus hits on you, he is attracted to you. Any time a male friend is friendzoned. Any time someone on an online dating site sends you a wink or writes you a message. HUNDREDS as in at least 100. Easily. The average 30-35 year old woman is not that fit, for one thing. The average 5' 4" woman in that age range is 149#. The woman you are envisioning is not average. 3
somedude81 Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 The average 30-35 year old woman is not that fit, for one thing. The average 5' 4" woman in that age range is 149#. The woman you are envisioning is not average. So the average 30-35 year old woman is overweight. Does that mean she was overweight all throughout her 20's too?
mesmerized Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 So the average 30-35 year old woman is overweight. Does that mean she was overweight all throughout her 20's too? You can go, put the stats in and see for yourself for women in their twenties. BMI 20 is not average in one's twenties either.
xxoo Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 So the average 30-35 year old woman is overweight. Does that mean she was overweight all throughout her 20's too? Using the calculator, the average 25 year old at 5'4" is 142#, which is in the normal weight range, but considerably heavier than 120#. The average 18 year old at 5'4" is 133# 5'4" and 120# simply is not average. 1
TouchedByViolet Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 Like I've always said for the most part Women complain because they've been hurt by the game Men complain because they've never been in the game Yes. Average guys I know just have fewer options in the dating department compared to women. Anyone can get lucky but the opportunities are less for the men I have seen. Women tend to complain about how the guy they are dating/in a relationship/love. They complain about him but still are attracted to him. Guys on the other hand complain they can't find a women who is attracted to them. This makes a lot of men feel like they are stuck in a rut they can't get out of. 1
Els Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 By age 30 to 35 (my age range)? Yes. Hundreds. Smack dab average. 5'4", 120 lbs, fairly fit, white with an average face who gets about to bars, went to high school and college and was not a total wallflower, and has had a few jobs, maybe served as a waitress or bartender along the way. Hundreds. They all count. Any time a guy on the street, in the bar, in the club, on the bus hits on you, he is attracted to you. Any time a male friend is friendzoned. Any time someone on an online dating site sends you a wink or writes you a message. HUNDREDS as in at least 100. Easily. A 5'4" woman at 120 lbs is about as 'average' as a 6' man or a 7" penis, sorry. Those are only the average in select countries, and definitely not in the country that y'all live in. Not that a 6' man necessarily is more attractive than a 5'7" man (or that the 120 lbs woman is necessarily more attractive than the 140 lbs woman). But strictly speaking, the average has to be the range that most people fall in. That also being said, your estimates are way off. Even women who are stereotypically very attractive don't get HUNDREDS of men hitting on them. Online dating really doesn't count because anyone can easily send off hundreds of messages within an hour. Getting a message in online dating is like you guys getting a smile from a prostitute when you walk down the red light district. 2
somedude81 Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 Using the calculator, the average 25 year old at 5'4" is 142#, which is in the normal weight range, but considerably heavier than 120#. The average 18 year old at 5'4" is 133# Well there, then you acknowledged my point. The average woman was in the normal range during her late teens and throughout her 20's. That's when she got the majority of male attention. JuneJulySeptember was wrong about the weight but right about the numbers. Even then, I'm sure the average overweight 30 year old woman still gets plenty of male attention.
TheZebra Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 Dunno about other women here, but when I want to complain about men, I have an endless number of female friends to go to about it. Most recently, it's my real estate broker We talk more about our dates than we do real estate, which is hilarious. We'll be walking around an apartment while I take pictures and it'll be like "I can't believe he still hasn't called, I mean, can you bel - oh this bathroom will probably need a renovation - anyways, can you believe him?!" 2
somedude81 Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 (edited) One thing I really hate about when talking about averages, is that it leads people to believe that it is acceptable to be overweight. The biggest problem is that all the very obese men and women are also taken into account and drive up the average. I do not believe that the average woman under 35 is overweight. Check this out. 10 average women I came up with using my guesses for weights all are 5'4 and 30 years old. 120,140,130,170,110,125,145,200,135,127 Average weight 140.2 This time again dropping the two outliers on either end 140,130,125,145,135,127 Average weight 133.6 BTW I'm certain that there are more women on the very heavy end then on the very thin end. So the average will always be skewed. Edited January 27, 2013 by somedude81
PJKino Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 Im sorry but the average struggling womens plight and mens cant be compared Women complain thye havent found their perfect soulmate yet the men on here complain they cant get a first date I know its frustratnig for women who want to get marrid if they havent found the one yet but be honest which genders plight would you rather have? The women who was in a few relationships and im sure had some very good moments and was loved at one point and had some fun while in it OR the guy who cant even get a first date and has never had effection from a women or a ran into a women who seemd semi interested in even entertaining the idea of going on a first date with him? One side just hasnt found their ideal partner yet the other one is ignored and rejected at every step and never felt loved or the warm embrace of the opposite sex.. It's not the same..
mesmerized Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 Well there, then you acknowledged my point. The average woman was in the normal range during her late teens and throughout her 20's. That's when she got the majority of male attention. JuneJulySeptember was wrong about the weight but right about the numbers. Even then, I'm sure the average overweight 30 year old woman still gets plenty of male attention. Don't be sure and on that note, don't talk out of your bum.
somedude81 Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 Don't be sure and on that note, don't talk out of your bum. Unless you can prove me wrong, you're dong the same. 1
mesmerized Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 Unless you can prove me wrong, you're dong the same. sorry but you KNOW you are talking out of your ass. Like I said even you who supposedly struggle see yourself better than the fat 30 year old, let alone men who have it even slightly better. None of the unattractive older (or younger for that matter) women I know ever got "plenty of" attention.
Author JuneJulySeptember Posted January 27, 2013 Author Posted January 27, 2013 A 5'4" woman at 120 lbs is about as 'average' as a 6' man or a 7" penis, sorry. Those are only the average in select countries, and definitely not in the country that y'all live in. Not that a 6' man necessarily is more attractive than a 5'7" man (or that the 120 lbs woman is necessarily more attractive than the 140 lbs woman). But strictly speaking, the average has to be the range that most people fall in. That also being said, your estimates are way off. Even women who are stereotypically very attractive don't get HUNDREDS of men hitting on them. Online dating really doesn't count because anyone can easily send off hundreds of messages within an hour. Getting a message in online dating is like you guys getting a smile from a prostitute when you walk down the red light district. Pfft. A Weight Watchers support network Please. It's just a number. 120, 130, 140. What's the difference. Although 140 is pretty big. A woman getting a message in online dating is like ... A MAN getting a message in online dating. What an amazing analogy!
Woggle Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 There are plenty of whiny people in both genders.
somedude81 Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 sorry but you KNOW you are talking out of your ass. Like I said even you who supposedly struggle see yourself better than the fat 30 year old, let alone men who have it even slightly better. None of the unattractive older (or younger for that matter) women I know ever got "plenty of" attention. You saw that picture of the "out of shape" girls I showed up. I'm sure they all got more attention from the opposite sex then I ever did. 1
xxoo Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 Well there, then you acknowledged my point. The average woman was in the normal range during her late teens and throughout her 20's. That's when she got the majority of male attention. JuneJulySeptember was wrong about the weight but right about the numbers. Even then, I'm sure the average overweight 30 year old woman still gets plenty of male attention. The weight matters. If he thinks a 120# 5'4" 30 year old is "smack dab average", his perception of average is very skewed. His perception of average face may be just as skewed. Average men may not even notice or acknowledge the truly average women, because they are looking at the not-super-hot, but thin and pretty women. 1
Author JuneJulySeptember Posted January 27, 2013 Author Posted January 27, 2013 The weight matters. If he thinks a 120# 5'4" 30 year old is "smack dab average", his perception of average is very skewed. His perception of average face may be just as skewed. Average men may not even notice or acknowledge the truly average women, because they are looking at the not-super-hot, but thin and pretty women. Thank you, thank you. I knew this would come up and it always does. The perception that guys who fail are hitting on the creme of the crop of women and ignoring 'average' women :lmao:. I think NOTHING is further from the truth. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/369954-do-you-care-what-she-wears-2.html#post4555728 Read all of my posts on page 2 of that thread. I'm pretty sure NONE of the guys here who struggle approach women of that caliber either.
Author JuneJulySeptember Posted January 27, 2013 Author Posted January 27, 2013 I do I go after women like Miss Jacqueline because I'm about as attractive as she is and I feel that I have a lot to offer outside of appearance anyways I can't date average or below average women because I'm just not attracted to them. It would accomplish nothing really Oh yea. You're the impossibly handsome, high earning guy with 1000s of friends the world over who can't get a date to save his life, right? You're not who I was talking about. BTW, the top good looking guys (YOU) have it easier than the top good looking gals. They get hit on by average women AND the top women.
fortyninethousand322 Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 Ya'll can wax poetic all you want about how independent women should ask men out and should pay for dates and put out by the 3rd date and change their own tires while you sit on your dead asses watching her and all that bullsh*t - and that's what it IS, bullsh*t. The mating dance is biological. You all keep trying to change something that's gone on since the dawn of time. I don't think I've EVER seen such a bunch of whining, childish men in my LIFE as I have here on LS. Men pursue women - that's how it is. That's how it's always been and that's how it STILL is. Whine all you want. Cry for 'change' all you want - it's always going to be this way. Why do you think local establishments have "Ladies Night" where the women get in for free or only pay $1 a drink? The freakin men constantly whine about how women always get all the breaks but are you all really THAT dense? Merchants know that wherever women are, MEN WILL FOLLOW. And that's how you pack a tavern with paying customers. Jeez, it's not rocket science! And as much as you all want to cry that there are no such things as 'leagues,' sorry to tell you, but there ARE. If leagues didn't exist, then every single whiney guy on this board would have women all over them. Bottom line - women can be choosey because they're always being pursued by MEN. It's a fact of life, boys. Get it? Got it? Good. What exactly does this have to do with what I wrote? Additionally, I know that women are the choosers in this world (some people argue that women in developing countries aren't choosers but I disagree). But, it's also clear (here in North America at least) that the kinds of men they choose aren't exactly quality. Take a lot at who your friends or peers are dating or threads here on LS. It's one of the reasons I don't feel bad for women in bad relationships: because they chose to have a relationship with those "bad" men that they chose. So yeah whine about how the guy you (general you not you specifically) dated cheated on you or did something hurtful. I'll be there on the sidelines knowing exactly why this happened, and knowing that it's not going to change. Never will. Cry about it all you want...
fortyninethousand322 Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 Average men may not even notice or acknowledge the truly average women, because they are looking at the not-super-hot, but thin and pretty women. There was a thread in which a poster lamented that she was just "average". She posted pictures of herself. I commented that I would not consider her average and probably would not have approached her if I saw her somewhere because I would think she was out of my league. Everyone else on that thread considered her average. So yeah, guys notice average women. We're just intimidated by them just like we are intimidated by all women.
Author JuneJulySeptember Posted January 27, 2013 Author Posted January 27, 2013 There was a thread in which a poster lamented that she was just "average". She posted pictures of herself. I commented that I would not consider her average and probably would not have approached her if I saw her somewhere because I would think she was out of my league. Everyone else on that thread considered her average. So yeah, guys notice average women. We're just intimidated by them just like we are intimidated by all women. Yup. I remember her. That's pretty indicative of a woman I might like/go for. And there was another thread yesterday by a pretty average woman who said she only goes for players, pretty boys, and ignores nice average men. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/369927-how-do-you-stop-falling-wrong-type-man We don't have to make this stuff up. It's real. 1
xxoo Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 There was a thread in which a poster lamented that she was just "average". She posted pictures of herself. I commented that I would not consider her average and probably would not have approached her if I saw her somewhere because I would think she was out of my league. Everyone else on that thread considered her average. So yeah, guys notice average women. We're just intimidated by them just like we are intimidated by all women. The average man is not so intimidated by women. That puts your outside the norm.
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