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Simply not fun talking to females


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Posted

I just feel nothing when I chat with women. A few days ago I got into a awesome chat with some dude about a certain game. A year ago at a wedding I was talking to some really smart guy about different fields of science.

 

With women I feel like there is NO depth to any chat. The questions women ask me really angers me as well. When ladies ask stuff they are always trying to see your status. Where do you work? How much money you make? Where do you like to go? Endless shallow questions that have nothing to do with the real me but only my status.

 

Then here comes the really frustrating thing.

Her: What do you do for fun?

Me: I like to blah blah blah

Her: Oh really?

Me: yeah

Her: what else

Me: Blah blah blah video games

Her: Video Games....? "Is now turned off and lost respect for you"

Her: "Stops making eye contact"

 

GAME OVER! Dating pretty much comes down to being fake, Talking about boring crap that only makes women happy, Taking women to boring places that only makes them happy and endlessly putting on an alpha male show. WORK, WORK, WORK, while women do nothing but look pretty. At any second she could be TURNED OFF instantly ending all the hard work you put into this long date. One freaking wrong or wrong body movement can turn a female off. It's never fun being around females now.

  • Like 1
Posted

Just seems like you haven't met any gals who act real.

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Posted (edited)

The # of women out there who only care about your 'status' during conversation is the same as the number of men I meet in a bar who want to talk about sex. Both sexes are riddled with people who only want to make 'shallow conversation' as you put it.

 

And honestly, woman perspective here, when I'm out with a guy I'm curious about him and want to know more about him so the conversation tends to skew towards questions that give me a better understanding of the guy. It's a great sign for me if the guy and I are able to talk for an hour about, for example, Tarantino movies, but at the end I'll try to steer conversation back to him because I want to get to know him. And yes, sometimes things you say can be a turn off. If a guy told me he goes to church every Sunday, that would be a DQ for him.

 

Bottom line, we don't want to waste time talking to a guy we're not compatible with.

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
  • Like 2
Posted
All you care about is LMS :laugh:.

 

Oh yeah, CLEARLY. That's why I posted a whole thread about how the guy I'm into which OBVIOUSLY fits that profile.

 

Dating is about getting to know another person. You need to ask each other questions, and, you know, get to know each other to see if you're compatible. When you're talking to another dude you're not trying to go on a date with him so the conversation topics are different.

 

If you don't understand this simple concept...

Posted

OP, have you tried engaging them into a discussion ?

 

The one who asks questions controls the discussion OP.

Ask open ended questions, show interest, avoid close ended questions, notice things about her that might get the discussion going.

 

And yes, many are highly shallow ... but from time to time you get a real diamond. :)

  • Like 1
Posted
I just feel nothing when I chat with women. A few days ago I got into a awesome chat with some dude about a certain game. A year ago at a wedding I was talking to some really smart guy about different fields of science.

 

With women I feel like there is NO depth to any chat.

 

That's exactly MY definition of shallow.

 

I find it funny how women say that a male is "bitter" when he's only relaying his own experiences.

 

Ditto.

 

To the OP' date=' bad, bad, bad move. You shouldn't have mentioned video games. You are automatic loser status in most girls' books when you say it. Talk about something else.[/quote']

 

Also ditto.

 

And yes, many are highly shallow ... but from time to time you get a real diamond. :)

 

Just make sure you're not getting glass.

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Posted

Meh, I have plenty of fun, even when I'm f+cking up. You guys are taking it way too serious. As much as I love it, you think I want to talk about science of sound engineering and other sh-t with dudes all day? Sometimes I will talk about all kinds of sh-t with girls and its just automatically fun.

 

I have had some very deep conversations with women - you guys need to meet more girls and stop expecting a f-cking oral dissertation everytime you meet one :laugh:.

  • Like 3
Posted (edited)
I find it funny how women say that a male is "bitter" when he's only relaying his own experiences. Then again, I'm not surprised given the nature of this site. :rolleyes:

 

To the OP, bad, bad, bad move. You shouldn't have mentioned video games. You are automatic loser status in most girls' books when you say it. Talk about something else.

 

He hasn't enjoyed talking to one girl or woman, ever?? We're all just airheads - it isn't possible that he's even a teensy bit boring? He can't find a "nerd girl" to talk to? (maybe because they aren't hot enough to look at?)

 

So many women seem to blame themselves - I know I've been really critical of myself, and I'll wake up thinking, "this should be so much easier. I know it can be, so why can't I get into that mindset again??" and they're thinking, "women are brainless, shallow sluts, who only want the alpha douches."

 

I've had the experience of being called down-to-earth, fun, smart, been told that I was loved - but then laughed at, when it came to the idea that they might actually be in love with me. That was a "bitter dude" to would complain about women not wanting him because he didn't have the car, or the right job, or he wasn't Indiana effing Jones. I wasn't good enough for him, because I wasn't pretty enough - although he tried it on again, when he realized how interested I'd been in him, how strong my feelings had been.

 

So, the way I read this is that the trophies don't measure up when it comes to actual interaction.

Edited by Anela
  • Like 4
Posted
I find it funny how women say that a male is "bitter" when he's only relaying his own experiences. Then again, I'm not surprised given the nature of this site. :rolleyes:

 

Yes, because having a couple of 'bad experiences' automatically allows you to categorize ALL women the same way, right?

 

So if I go out to a bar today, get charmed by some dude, sleep with him, and he never calls me again I would be TOTALLY correct in coming here and staring a 'All men are douches who only use women' thread, right? Because I had a bad experience?

 

Please. How about stepping back and actually thinking about what you're posting before you generalize something to 3 billion people.

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Posted (edited)

If you truly find women that annoying you can always go gay...

 

If youre doing all the work to keep the interaction going youre doing it all wrong btw....

Edited by Imajerk17
Posted

OP, you can be disappointed and angry about this....or, see it as a gift. When it happens, smile and be thankful that the particular person communicated to you immediately that they are on a different path in life from you. Show your appreciation for this revelation by removing yourself so they can continue on to a person who is on their path. None of us are perfect. Sometimes we wander off our path.

 

If you're young, and I presume you are, the relevant news is that this dynamic will continue throughout life. You have choices. Good luck.

  • Like 4
Posted
I find it funny how women say that a male is "bitter" when he's only relaying his own experiences. Then again, I'm not surprised given the nature of this site. :rolleyes:

 

To the OP, bad, bad, bad move. You shouldn't have mentioned video games. You are automatic loser status in most girls' books when you say it. Talk about something else.

Uhhhh what ? I talk about my love for video games when given the chance. It's all about presentation... If your a nerdy, gangly looking kid with acne , glasses , and a braces lisp and you say " erghhhh I lerk verdeo germes " sure its gonna be weird.

 

If you look nice like you take care of yourself and are smooth and eloquent in your conversation with something like " yeah I'm pretty competitive, so I find myself at quite a few video game tournaments trying to win some prizes, I hope you can keep up . " if you say it with confidence and follow it up with a smile that says " challenge me " you will have success. I am a living example.

Posted
I just feel nothing when I chat with women. A few days ago I got into a awesome chat with some dude about a certain game. A year ago at a wedding I was talking to some really smart guy about different fields of science.

 

With women I feel like there is NO depth to any chat. The questions women ask me really angers me as well. When ladies ask stuff they are always trying to see your status. Where do you work? How much money you make? Where do you like to go? Endless shallow questions that have nothing to do with the real me but only my status.

 

Then here comes the really frustrating thing.

Her: What do you do for fun?

Me: I like to blah blah blah

Her: Oh really?

Me: yeah

Her: what else

Me: Blah blah blah video games

Her: Video Games....? "Is now turned off and lost respect for you"

Her: "Stops making eye contact"

 

GAME OVER! Dating pretty much comes down to being fake, Talking about boring crap that only makes women happy, Taking women to boring places that only makes them happy and endlessly putting on an alpha male show. WORK, WORK, WORK, while women do nothing but look pretty. At any second she could be TURNED OFF instantly ending all the hard work you put into this long date. One freaking wrong or wrong body movement can turn a female off. It's never fun being around females now.

 

How are video games deep discussion?

 

Power Girl, please please please please please consider talking to another man (mature man, not a man your age and a healthy man) about your issues with women. You have so much anger directed to women that obviously you got more going on under the surface then just having poor dialogue with women. You need the mentorship and guidence of a mature, healthy older man that can help you with these struggles. Emphasis on "mature" and "healthy". Not all older men are mature or healthy. Pick your mentor wisely.

  • Like 2
Posted
Another thing is you need to learn to strike up a flirty chat with a girl and stop talking shop that means no hobbies/interests/jobs that only you will like and find interesting. You can find flirting enjoyable but you need the right woman to put you in the right mood. I'm not talking about the fake pua flirtatious crap players and the hard up use to con women. That kind of stuff will not make you happy and will increase your anger/bitterness because it is work. Maintaining utter bull**** is tedious.

 

This. If all you talk about is the "job interview" stuff, your date won't go anywhere. I should know. The key is to start flirting and everything else will come naturally. I myself am still struggling with how exactly to begin with no prior signal from women. I guess the hardest thing is to launch the ship from drydock, from that point onward it should be smooth sailing. :)

 

By the way, I've never had a woman ask me how much I earn. That would be impolite. What kind of girls are you talking to, OP? :eek:

Posted
If you see males making repeat assertions on this site about how women on the whole prefer alpha males, then you MIGHT want to think to yourself that they're not "bitter". Guys don't just come here and make this **** up. If women didn't prefer alpha males, then you wouldn't here over and over and over and over again how women go for these guys time after time.

 

As far as the type of girls that the OP talks to, I can't speak on that. Should he speak to girls that have "nerdier" interests? I guess, it's a start. But just because a girl and you hold common interests doesn't mean that she'll be attracted to you. I've seen a lot of girls go for guys that they hold nothing in common in and try to start relationships but those relationships end up failing big time. Also, just because a girl is into video games doesn't mean she isn't attractive and doesn't mean that she'll want a "nerdy" guy.

 

Could the OP be a boring person? Sure. Talking about video games isn't going to get him anywhere. But there's been "exciting" guys who have been passed over for even "more exciting" guys. For some women, it just isn't enough. Being yourself just isn't enough. Being the best version you can be isn't enough. You have to be an exaggerated caricature of yourself that promises to take her on a journey through the Milky Way Galaxy and back. Women just want a "a normal guy", right?

 

Women just need to give up the ghost and admit that most of the gender on the whole, are attracted to dominant, alpha males. If that wasn't the case, then PUA wouldn't exist. Repeated assertions of the necessity to be an alpha male wouldn't exist. Women's inability to do so will not progress the discussion on gender relations and will send a wrong message to the men who keep failing with women. That they should continue being beta and continue to do the same things that made a girl cheat on them with a more dominant guy or made a girl they've been attempting to "crack" for months, only to see them to go home with a guy they only met the same night.

 

Take some of your own advice, and consider the fact that women on here are also TELLING THE TRUTH ABOUT THEIR EXPERIENCES. For heaven's sake.

 

Guys like this could be "dominant and alpha" just by liking themselves and being quietly confident! I know that I feel much better, and feel better around men, when I am feeling that way.

  • Like 1
  • Author
Posted
Take some of your own advice, and consider the fact that women on here are also TELLING THE TRUTH ABOUT THEIR EXPERIENCES. For heaven's sake.

 

Guys like this could be "dominant and alpha" just by liking themselves and being quietly confident! I know that I feel much better, and feel better around men, when I am feeling that way.

 

Women have a hundred options who to date. Women don't even need to work hard for a date so why should we even care about female stories.

 

It takes a woman 1 day just to find another guy.

It can take a guy 1 year or more just to find a date.

Posted
Women have a hundred options who to date. Women don't even need to work hard for a date so why should we even care about female stories.

 

It takes a woman 1 day just to find another guy.

It can take a guy 1 year or more just to find a date.

 

You shouldn't disrespect Anela like that. Or any woman. Regardless of how "easy" it is for them to move on...I'm sure it can be(guys are LOL). Her and their story matters just as much as yours.

 

Many women on LS have trouble. Where treated like crap; have trouble moving on. You needn't say their story matters less.

  • Like 2
Posted
With women I feel like there is NO depth to any chat. The questions women ask me really angers me as well. When ladies ask stuff they are always trying to see your status. Where do you work? How much money you make? Where do you like to go? Endless shallow questions that have nothing to do with the real me but only my status.

 

There's depth to the conversation, you just don't know it. Women (in general, when around more inept men shall we say) are calculating, very smart and intelligent. They screen everything you say about even mundane topics. They notice not only your answers, but your eye contact, body language, etc. There's a lot going on there.

 

It's very likely that when you mentioned video games alarm bells went off in her head telling her that you were some weirdo who plays games 15 hours a day, are unemployed living with your parents, you rarely shower and don't brush your teeth. It might be the case that all of that stuff is untrue. But, she's got to make a snap judgement. And she made one. Most girls do.

 

GAME OVER! Dating pretty much comes down to being fake, Talking about boring crap that only makes women happy, Taking women to boring places that only makes them happy and endlessly putting on an alpha male show. WORK, WORK, WORK, while women do nothing but look pretty. At any second she could be TURNED OFF instantly ending all the hard work you put into this long date. One freaking wrong or wrong body movement can turn a female off. It's never fun being around females now.

 

For certain men yes this is the case. Some guys have to jump through hoops to get female attention. It's a fact, there's a surplus of men and promiscuity these days makes it easier for many men to attract (and date or sleep with) many women. In my opinion, this is a product of nature not nurture, so it's not likely to "get better" by studying PUA or some crap. You are who you are, if you still want a girlfriend or wife one day you're going to have to go through this for a while...

  • Like 2
Posted
You shouldn't disrespect Anela like that. Or any woman. Regardless of how "easy" it is for them to move on...I'm sure it can be(guys are LOL). Her and their story matters just as much as yours.

 

Many women on LS have trouble. Where treated like crap; have trouble moving on. You needn't say their story matters less.

 

Thank you, Todd. I don't move on easily, and I don't easily meet men, either. Not men that are a good match for me (and it has nothing to do with the lists that guys make here, with their assumptions of what is wanted).

  • Like 1
Posted
But doesn't relevancy dictate how much a story matters?

 

Whoever heard of relevancy on an open forum?

 

To her, it is relevant enough. Even if it isn't to you. Or anyone else.

Posted
Due to sex linked disease and reckless behavior there are less men and then as you get older the shorter longevity makes the short list even shorter.

 

I mean just strictly speaking among young people in the US under 40 there's approximately 104 men for every 100 women. Not wildly skewed like in parts of China but still skewed.

 

War, disease, and manual labor don't kill as many men as it used to.

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Posted

Seems to me there are comic book conventions and video game conventions where Power Girl could go to meet women with the same interests.

  • Like 1
Posted
Much of that is from new immigration so unless you are looking to go after women fresh from foreign lands you don't have anything to worry about.

 

Well the birth ratio in the US is 104.5 males to 100 females. So it seems as if immigration has very little effect on those numbers.

Posted
Well in that case the sex linked diseases and reckless behavior especially in the teen years will take care of the surplus that worries you so.

 

Eh, it's not the ratio alone that is worrisome, but in conjunction with other factors that is causing a problem.

Posted
The only real problem not in the favor of many men is the ratio of gorgeous women to all men is quite low.

 

I don't even know what "gorgeous" means to anyone so I have no idea if that's a real problem or not. I'd say a good 75-85% (give or take) of women I see are pretty good looking. Maybe it's my age and geographic location...

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