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49 yr m, looking to share


Caldespair

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49 male, California, 2 wonderful teenage girls, hoping to connect with a friend to further discuss these marital (separation /div) issues. It's funny, your in a relationship for 20 years, and poof, ALONE. I have my family, siblings, friends, but now, I don't have that someone to share the real stuff with. This could be perhaps valuable to someone else also? Please let me know if any interest. Thanks to this forum.

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Glad to see you two possibly on the way to a connection:) But I just want to let you know how private messages work here. If I remember right, once you are a registered member, need to have done something like 50 posts before the PM option becomes available, unless that's changed now? But I've tried to see if I can send either of you PMs but it doesn't give the option yet:(

 

I really have never understood LS's policy on that.:confused::(

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You need to have around fifty posts but also be here for more than thirty days before you can start Private Messaging other members.

 

This is not a hook-up site. It is where people come to share their problems and issues in public.

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Agreed. Not looking for a hook up just want to share my situation with those who are or have gone through it.

Then start sharing - that is what the site is for...

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100 messages and 30 days

 

-or-

 

become a subscribing member (tiny fee) and have instant access to PMs, photos, etc. See top right-hand corner of the screen for the link.

 

....

 

Just goes to show--ask and you shall receive! Glad you guys found each other. Hopefully you can provide each other with the support and companionship you both seem to be seeking.

 

Good luck!:)

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Wow...Thanks Mom, Get right on that

Well, you said you came here to share your situation.

 

Care to share what that situation is?

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Doubt that i am any different than anyone else here. !8 years of marriage to a man that i have not loved for over 5 yrs now. I have been faithful but have faked everything to the point of disgust. There is no laughter in my home unless he is gone. Kids are happier when he is not around. His middle name is Offense. My kids call their father Captain K.J. kill joy.

In the process of separation. Its hard. I question every motive to every decision I make.

How's that?

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So sorry to hear this.:( There is a separated/divorced section. I would suggest posting in that section. You're more likely to get helpful and supportive feedback from married/separated/divorced folks who've gone through or are currently going through the same issues there. They can give more specific advice and tips to deal with the tough situation ahead. The folks frequenting this section tend to be single daters.

 

It must be rough all around--for you, your husband, and your kids. You've come to the right place for support and advice. Good luck in your journey and with the challenges you'll face.

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Doubt that i am any different than anyone else here. !8 years of marriage to a man that i have not loved for over 5 yrs now. I have been faithful but have faked everything to the point of disgust. There is no laughter in my home unless he is gone. Kids are happier when he is not around. His middle name is Offense. My kids call their father Captain K.J. kill joy.

In the process of separation. Its hard. I question every motive to every decision I make.

How's that?

Chelle.lynne, I get that you must feel bitter, emotionally betrayed, starved of affection and resentful - but being angry at us for reaching out to you, on a forum which is specifically here for people to mutually support and comfort one another, is kinda counter-productive.

We're not the ones to be the butt of your anger here.

We're here to help others whose situations may well be similar and perhaps only slightly different to those of others - but that's the point. We've all had experiences we can share.... but no two are the same, and it pays to reach out and seek camaraderie, through giving us the chance to counsel, in a non-professional way....

For example, if you check on Caldespair's thread, he did exactly that.....

 

Don't bite us for 'hugging' you....

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  • 2 weeks later...
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Chelle.lynne

Your kids description of your stbxh is very similar to what my teenage girls say to me about my stbxw. I guess I've been the easy when it came/comes to my daughters. We always laugh, have fun, but w, not so.

How is the separation going? U and I have similar vintage marriages. I am going to consult a lawyer tomorrow just to know my rights. Only 1 of my girls is under 18, and I see them often.

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