SJC2008 Posted November 6, 2012 Posted November 6, 2012 That's way too much for me man. People view sex differently but giving head to 17 guys and seven sex partners by 24 would send me packing.
Drseussgrrl Posted November 6, 2012 Posted November 6, 2012 Are you serious? I've had unprotected sex within the confines of a committed relationship PLENTY of times. What exactly is your hangup here? You can't stand the idea that some other dude's sperm has been inside of her - ANYWHERE? Go find yourself a virgin. This girl has done nothing wrong.
todreaminblue Posted November 6, 2012 Posted November 6, 2012 Thanks for the replies guys. Here's the thing, I've been with women who slept with even more guys like 10+, and I can accept and live with them. The difference this time is, my belief is somewhat broken. I feel very intimate with girls who are willing to swallow, because I felt I had to earn them each and every time. My ex only willing to do it after we dated for 3 months. I always believe this is a lot more intimate, and it means the girl really like me. It's hard to accept why my girlfriend would swallowed for each of the guys....and she does it for convenience sake, and less messy. Now I don't even feel that sense of exclusivity when she does it with me. Here's the thing tho, I am ok with her slept with 7 guys and gave heads to 17 guys, it doesn't really bother me that much...but what really bothers me is the fact that she swallowed for every one of them. My ex told me she would do it sometime with guys she was dating, but NEVER swallow anything until more serious. She saves it them for that special some one. One of my friends said swallow/split is really down to personal preference, and it makes no difference when she's already down there. Am I stupid to feel this way? I feel you are justified in feeling what you are feeling towards the act of oral.Condoms were created for protection for casual sex......and swallowing or having sex without condoms in any form should only occur in serious long term monogamous relationships ..with an std all clear from the doctor......marriage before sex the ultimate....i'm no angel......my history is extensive.......oral without condoms or sex without condoms has been a no go zone unless i have been in a committed relationship...unfortunately i have been with guys who cheat...that grosses me out so changing the subject..... putting other people at risk as well as yourself because you cant reach for a prophylactic or cant be bothered pretty silly and irresponisible
fortyninethousand322 Posted November 6, 2012 Posted November 6, 2012 This is why couples sharing sexual history is a bad idea. As long as you're disease free there's nothing else you need to share. No girl needs to know I'm a virgin, and I certainly don't want to know what some girl did with God knows how many people. Just don't share that kind of information... 2
SensitiveTJ Posted November 6, 2012 Posted November 6, 2012 No i am from Canada. She brought up the topic first, I didn't ask at first. I agreed shouldn't have asked. How do I know if the numbers are true? I think it has to do with her personality as a pleaser. She never refused anything I've asked her to do... I mean sure some guys just took full advantage of it. Hmmm...to be honest this part intrigues me. You're saying that your girl was the one to initiate the convo about sexual history? I think that's fairly unusual.
sweetkiwi Posted November 6, 2012 Posted November 6, 2012 oral sex with a condom? Never heard of it. 1
fortyninethousand322 Posted November 6, 2012 Posted November 6, 2012 oral sex with a condom? Never heard of it. Me neither. Then again, the first (and only) box of condoms I ever bought is still unopened. So, I'm not exactly an expert...
Bittersweetutsc Posted November 7, 2012 Posted November 7, 2012 Gave heads to 17 guys is not something easy for any bf to take. I agree swallow another man fluid is very intimate and should be saved for someone special. Sounds like your gf is a pleaser, since giving heads is more for the man that herself. Maybe it's personal preference or convenience, but I will have to really like the guy to let him shoot his load on my mouth. Maybe other girls can confirm this?
sweetkiwi Posted November 7, 2012 Posted November 7, 2012 i have to really like a guy to give him head. At all. Let alone swallow his cum. But i'm not the op's lady. I've never had the conversation with my man about how may times we've done what and with who. It holds no bearings on our current relationship. I've made fun of him for being a sexy ladies man which he laughs off. And since i approached him i'm sure he knows this isn't my first rodeo. But if he specifically asked me i would tell him. And vice versa. Honesty is important in any relationship. Just ask yourself if you can handle the truth.
rhymes Posted November 7, 2012 Posted November 7, 2012 Certainly nothing to worry about. If those are the types of things you're getting caught up on, you're going to have a tough time dating. Is it ideal ? Maybe not, but it's in the past, completely out of your control and if even if you wanted to do something about it, there's nothing you can do. Enjoy what you have now and the person you're with. Trivial things like that can ruin relationships. Just be happy she's yours Also, don't ask, don't tell is a great policy. If you're going to ask tough questions you've got to be prepared to take tough answers. 2
Under The Radar Posted November 7, 2012 Posted November 7, 2012 If your girlfriend treats you well it shouldn't matter. You were happy with the relationship until she disclosed how many men she performed oral on. She is committed to having sex and "swallowing" with only you at this point. Your missing the forest for the trees. If you keep making a big deal out of it she will leave you and up the number of guys she's blown to 18 (and it won't be with you). 1
dasein Posted November 7, 2012 Posted November 7, 2012 No i am from Canada. She brought up the topic first, I didn't ask at first. I agreed shouldn't have asked. How do I know if the numbers are true? Multiply by 3 to get the true number. JK there's no way to know, it's a good bet I would make given the details that there were significantly more, but there is no way to know for sure. Only you can decide whether you can leave this in the past or move on. Her prior behavior is not outrageous, nor is your feeling about it. You can't help how you feel. In your shoes, I'd try to focus on other factors and whether she treats you well and respectfully, is loyal, cheerful, giving, there for you when you need her to be, whatever is really important to you. EDIT: one other thing to think about is whether her behavior in the BJ department is compulsive, impulsive, or just how things played out with guys she dated. If there are signs of impulsive behavior, spending, drinking, drug, etc. best to move on.
kiss_andmakeup Posted November 7, 2012 Posted November 7, 2012 I will neeeeeeever understand why couples feel it necessary to share the intimate details of their sexual past. Sure, there are some things that merit discussing (STD's, mainly). But as far as # of partners, sexual acts they've done, even identifying exactly how many men's semen she's swallowed???? Why on earth is sharing this information necessary?? How does it even come up? I am honestly curious because I can't imagine my boyfriend asking me about those things, or vice versa. Who wants to put all those images in their significant other's head?? 1
Titania22 Posted November 7, 2012 Posted November 7, 2012 Who are all these people keeping accurate records of how many people they have done each specific sexual act with? Surely their brain cells have better things to think about. 2
Author venatic Posted November 7, 2012 Author Posted November 7, 2012 Multiply by 3 to get the true number. JK there's no way to know, it's a good bet I would make given the details that there were significantly more, but there is no way to know for sure. Only you can decide whether you can leave this in the past or move on. Her prior behavior is not outrageous, nor is your feeling about it. You can't help how you feel. In your shoes, I'd try to focus on other factors and whether she treats you well and respectfully, is loyal, cheerful, giving, there for you when you need her to be, whatever is really important to you. EDIT: one other thing to think about is whether her behavior in the BJ department is compulsive, impulsive, or just how things played out with guys she dated. If there are signs of impulsive behavior, spending, drinking, drug, etc. best to move on. no signs of impulsive behavior really. I will try to make it work at this point. Honest, i see no sign of her exploring, as far as I am concern this is a committed relationship. I guess we just have different preferences... She doesn't even know that I am frustrated, because I didn't her I feel it was disgusting for her to swallowed anyone other than her two ex boyfriends. When we talked on Sat, she simply said she did it for convenient and no cleaning up involved. She even told me she doesn't like the taste from some of the guys due to their diet. How should I tell her how I feel about this? I m not sure if she's going to bring it up or should I just tell her exactly what's in my mind?
mesmerized Posted November 7, 2012 Posted November 7, 2012 no signs of impulsive behavior really. I will try to make it work at this point. Honest, i see no sign of her exploring, as far as I am concern this is a committed relationship. I guess we just have different preferences... She doesn't even know that I am frustrated, because I didn't her I feel it was disgusting for her to swallowed anyone other than her two ex boyfriends. When we talked on Sat, she simply said she did it for convenient and no cleaning up involved. She even told me she doesn't like the taste from some of the guys due to their diet. How should I tell her how I feel about this? I m not sure if she's going to bring it up or should I just tell her exactly what's in my mind? What do you expect her to say if you bring it up? That she is sorry???
Author venatic Posted November 7, 2012 Author Posted November 7, 2012 I will neeeeeeever understand why couples feel it necessary to share the intimate details of their sexual past. Sure, there are some things that merit discussing (STD's, mainly). But as far as # of partners, sexual acts they've done, even identifying exactly how many men's semen she's swallowed???? Why on earth is sharing this information necessary?? How does it even come up? I am honestly curious because I can't imagine my boyfriend asking me about those things, or vice versa. Who wants to put all those images in their significant other's head?? She brought it up by asking me how many women I've slept with, that's how it started it. I was totally cool with it in the beginning until she asked if she was the best one I've ever had (oral)... I asked why, and then she told me all the guys said she gave the best heads ever. Out of curiosity, I asked how how many...that's why I found out the rest...
todreaminblue Posted November 7, 2012 Posted November 7, 2012 oral sex with a condom? Never heard of it. there are also dental dams for guys to give oral....it used to be common practice, but i guess aids was in heat at the time casual sex was rampant..even pros don't give BJs without condoms....people were probably more careful.....deb
veggirl Posted November 7, 2012 Posted November 7, 2012 What's the issue with swallowing? I fail to see what difference that makes. I mean even if she spit it out, his jizz was still swishing around in her mouth, sticking in between her teeth, coating the top of her mouth and tongue.
Drseussgrrl Posted November 7, 2012 Posted November 7, 2012 You should just be glad that you have a girl who likes giving oral. Lots of men would kill to be in your shoes.
EasyHeart Posted November 7, 2012 Posted November 7, 2012 I really need to get some advice.It bugs me a lot after I had this conversation with my gf. I've been dating this girl for 6 months, and we are serious about each other. However, I recently learned about her past as we discussed our love history. She's 24, and I am 28. She's a lot experience than me. She had 7 sexual partner before me, 3 were her former boyfriends. She had oral sex with 17 guys before me, and this is the part that's bothering me. I don't feel good about kissing her anymore after I learned she has been with 17 guys. Call me traditional or naive...I believe oral sex is even more intimate than sex. Out of all my ex and female friends,(including my cousins), They told me they usually have sex before oral sex and won't swallow unless they are bf and gf. I've had girls would go down on me, but wouldn't swallow as they told me they only do it if we are exclusive. On the other hand, my girlfriend swallowed with every guys she had been with. She said it was just more convenient and less messy for them. I.. just don't know how to cope with this. I guess it's personal preference, I don't know. Just to be clear, she didn't just give heads to some random guys. She went out with them at least for a date or two, but not in a relationship. To the ladies out there, do you think I am over reacting or do you share my point of view?Wasn't this the plot to "Clerks"? LiveLeak.com - Clerks: The 37 Dicks Scene (1994) 1
stillafool Posted November 7, 2012 Posted November 7, 2012 I really need to get some advice.It bugs me a lot after I had this conversation with my gf. I've been dating this girl for 6 months, and we are serious about each other. However, I recently learned about her past as we discussed our love history. She's 24, and I am 28. She's a lot experience than me. She had 7 sexual partner before me, 3 were her former boyfriends. She had oral sex with 17 guys before me, and this is the part that's bothering me. I don't feel good about kissing her anymore after I learned she has been with 17 guys. Call me traditional or naive...I believe oral sex is even more intimate than sex. Out of all my ex and female friends,(including my cousins), They told me they usually have sex before oral sex and won't swallow unless they are bf and gf. I've had girls would go down on me, but wouldn't swallow as they told me they only do it if we are exclusive. On the other hand, my girlfriend swallowed with every guys she had been with. She said it was just more convenient and less messy for them. I.. just don't know how to cope with this. I guess it's personal preference, I don't know. Just to be clear, she didn't just give heads to some random guys. She went out with them at least for a date or two, but not in a relationship. To the ladies out there, do you think I am over reacting or do you share my point of view? Yes I think you are over reacting. Why don't guys find out about their gfs sexual history before they make them their gfs? So many guys are complaining about their gfs sexual history these days it's sickening. Just for all the guys out there, women like sex too and more then likely all of your gfs have done stuff with other men that they won't tell you about. Why? Because men can't handle it. If you don't ask a woman about her sexual history before you make her your gf or wife, don't ask her after you do.
stillafool Posted November 7, 2012 Posted November 7, 2012 Gave heads to 17 guys is not something easy for any bf to take. I agree swallow another man fluid is very intimate and should be saved for someone special. Sounds like your gf is a pleaser, since giving heads is more for the man that herself. Maybe it's personal preference or convenience, but I will have to really like the guy to let him shoot his load on my mouth. Maybe other girls can confirm this? No not necessarily. Some women love to give head just like some men love to go down. It isn't very enjoyable if the person on the giving end is only doing it for the receivers pleasure.
stillafool Posted November 7, 2012 Posted November 7, 2012 Today girls see oral like a kiss on the mouth and not as bad as having vaginal intercourse until their mouth is full of std's. And how do guys view going down on a girl? Is their mouth full of std's as well?
Maddox Posted November 7, 2012 Posted November 7, 2012 17 is alot, and others on here with a shady past chalk it up to "oh she was young and experimenting, wanted to be loved, wanted a relationship" I call bull**** on that one, seems like that lesson should have been learned after, I dont know, 2 or 3?
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