avon20 Posted September 8, 2012 Posted September 8, 2012 I am a 32 year old man and my dating options to women are pretty much limited right now at least if I date someone within my age vicinity. The reasons for that is because I don't want to get married or have kids and most women in my age group want to settle down and start a family. If it was up to me I would just find a girlfriend that I could date for the rest of my life without having to live with her. Just a girlfriend that I can see 3 times a week at the most for the rest of my life. My best chance is to seek out women 10 years older than me who have already been married and then divorced and already raised their kids. My question is is it a good idea to put in my dating profile upfront that I have no intentions of getting married but that I would like to have a girlfriend that I can see no more than 3 times a week for the rest of my life? This way I'm being honest and upfront. How many years do I have to wait before I'm an eligible dating candidate?
Joaquin Posted September 8, 2012 Posted September 8, 2012 I have a feeling that your professed unwillingness to get married isn't the only thing stopping you finding someone "eligible". It all sounds like a lot of excuses to me.
Author avon20 Posted September 8, 2012 Author Posted September 8, 2012 I have a feeling that your professed unwillingness to get married isn't the only thing stopping you finding someone "eligible". It all sounds like a lot of excuses to me. Well that's where you couldn't be more wrong. I know how women are and they are looking for a man who wants commitment. That isn't just me talking. All you have to do is read the countless number of threads on these boards about women asking for advice about what to do when their boyfriends don't want to get married.
mesmerized Posted September 8, 2012 Posted September 8, 2012 What else do you have to offer? Why would a woman opt out to be your sex toy and not much else? (Come on, we all know why you don't want to see them only 3 times a week) This kind of reminds of the very unattractive guys who message me on online dating sites asking if I would want a fwb relationship with them. I'm not quite sure why they think women would want them for the one thing they're so undesirable for.
todreaminblue Posted September 8, 2012 Posted September 8, 2012 Well that's where you couldn't be more wrong. I know how women are and they are looking for a man who wants commitment. That isn't just me talking. All you have to do is read the countless number of threads on these boards about women asking for advice about what to do when their boyfriends don't want to get married. you know how women are well could you pass it on because i think more than half of us have trouble discerning what we are truly feeling it takes effort if you already know pass it on then i can go get a manicure instead of working out what i want....yes i am being sarcastic. I am curious to why you are on this board asking advice about a subject this being women and how you want to find a woman to who you dont want to commit too.Am i being a little mean by saying you should already know where to find these women because you know how they are? Shouldnt you then in all logical thought know where to find these women who are elusively waiting for you to bang them three times a week....very attractive offer you have by the way your knowledge of what women want coupled by the fact you are a commitment phobe...mmmmmm....so attractive.....sigh ill repent foomy horrible behaviour and joke later......marriage rox socks you know......oh thats right you dont know ..... hey you,run quick women in white dresses three o clock they are gonna get ya.......slinks off yelling over here girls.....:0)....there you go women just for you.....deb
Eternal Sunshine Posted September 8, 2012 Posted September 8, 2012 What else do you have to offer? Why would a woman opt out to be your sex toy and not much else? (Come on, we all know why you don't want to see them only 3 times a week) This kind of reminds of the very unattractive guys who message me on online dating sites asking if I would want a fwb relationship with them. I'm not quite sure why they think women would want them for the one thing they're so undesirable for. Haha - this happens to me too.
Author avon20 Posted September 8, 2012 Author Posted September 8, 2012 (edited) I don't even want to have sex with her. I have a personal problem.One reason I don't want to get married is because I don't want to be under the obligation to make love to her. I never want to have sex with my girlfriends in the last 5 years. I've been in 4 relationships. Just because you have never known a man who has no desire for sexual intimacy does not mean that those kind of men don't exist. They may be rare but I'm one of those rare men believe it or not. So for those who don't believe me then whatever advice you have for me isn't going to apply. Edited September 8, 2012 by avon20
TaraMaiden Posted September 8, 2012 Posted September 8, 2012 Remember everyone, this is Chris250... the trolling stirrer... I guess you should really all see this thread too....
enchanted24 Posted September 8, 2012 Posted September 8, 2012 My question is is it a good idea to put in my dating profile upfront that I have no intentions of getting married but that I would like to have a girlfriend that I can see no more than 3 times a week for the rest of my life? This way I'm being honest and upfront. How many years do I have to wait before I'm an eligible dating candidate? To answer your question, yes, I do think that you should say you're not looking for anything too serious. A lot of women are looking for something serious, it is better to let them know asap that you don't want any real strings attached. It's better to not disappoint anyone who is really looking and to not waste anyone's time who is serious about finding the right person. I'll bet you can find a woman who feels the same way.
todreaminblue Posted September 8, 2012 Posted September 8, 2012 I don't even want to have sex with her. I have a personal problem.One reason I don't want to get married is because I don't want to be under the obligation to make love to her. I never want to have sex with my girlfriends in the last 5 years. I've been in 4 relationships. Just because you have never known a man who has no desire for sexual intimacy does not mean that those kind of men don't exist. They may be rare but I'm one of those rare men believe it or not. So for those who don't believe me then whatever advice you have for me isn't going to apply. I am sorry that i was so flippant with my reply. Sexual intimacy for me comes with trust and understanding if i feel i can relate to someone i relate ata all levels when the trust isn't there i become mechanical.Sex can be mechaincal you dotn even have to think.It goes ahead whether you are there in spirit or not.Sexual intimacy is a beautiful thing passionate raw smile worthy.i could write something but i better not.Might get a bit racey.If you arent in love with someone sex becomes difficult too maybe you weren't in love like i mean in love....not just love.Sex is natural meant to happen and is meant to be enjoyed by both.If you have an understanding partner who knows your problems you can work on it.....might take effort but have hope.Do you ever want to have sex do you ever think about it or what does make you feel you wan tto have sex? lol.....i havent had sex in a long time i took time off for good behaviour......or because i wanted good behaviour.....thats a more apt description.......take some time find someone who you are attracted to .......who you wan tto eb with who meeets your idea of a partner same values.....trust too someone understanding and who has strength of character someone who will tell it like it needs to be said.....and you will or can have hope that maybe something absolutely beautiful can happen....thats my advice now i have read this post of yours.... again i apologise for my earlier reply.......deb
Author avon20 Posted September 9, 2012 Author Posted September 9, 2012 I have an addiction to masturbation and pornography. I prefer masturbation over sexual intimacy because it makes me feel like I am in control of my life.
FitChick Posted September 9, 2012 Posted September 9, 2012 Then you should either go onto an asexual dating website or forum or target older women who don't want sex but want a companion to socialize with at events where it's couples only.
Author avon20 Posted September 19, 2012 Author Posted September 19, 2012 I have a feeling that your professed unwillingness to get married isn't the only thing stopping you finding someone "eligible". It all sounds like a lot of excuses to me. My lack of desire to marry and have children may or may not be the only reason I can't find someone compatible but the point is that this reason alone is enough to limit my dating options. Even if I was doing everything else right it is all a moot point if the woman I am dating is not on the same page as I am about not wanting marriage and kids. Before any relationship has any chance of going anywhere we would both have to be on the same page about our desires concerning having a family someday. That's the first thing to look for in terms of compatibility because without being on the same page everything else is moot. So it does not matter whether or not my desire to not marry or have kids is the only thing keeping me single.
LittlePrince Posted September 19, 2012 Posted September 19, 2012 AVEN might be a better place to ask about this.
HeavenOrHell Posted September 30, 2012 Posted September 30, 2012 In the self improvement forum you said you were dying of cancer and have a year left to live, so not sure why you're talking about the future. Pretty sick to lie about something like that and have people try to help you >Most people are not fortunate enough to know when they will die. I myself have a pretty good idea that I will die in about 1 year due to my diagnosis with hodgkins lymphoma cancer. I am in stage 2. Docs say it is very treatable but I made a decision this week to stop the treatments and let the cancer take its course. I have my reasons for doing this. I am 32 years old and I am not married. I do not have kids. If I had those responsibilities then the argument that I am being selfish would have merit to it. But anyone who is single has more freedom to make decisions about their lives without being selfish in the process. I do not owe anyone anything at this point. There is one advantage to knowing when I will die and that is I no longer have to worry about self improvement. I feel liberated knowing that I do not have to floss my teeth anymore. I do not have to go to the dentist. I can stop saving money for retirement and just take a vacation to Alaska right now and enjoy myself. Eat all the high fat and high cholesterol food that I want since I will be dead long before I reap complications from it. The cancer will get me before tooth decay and heart disease will< http://www.loveshack.org/forums/mind-body-soul/self-improvement-personal-well-being/349242-if-you-knew-when-you-would-die
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