donmo Posted August 27, 2012 Posted August 27, 2012 So I started seeing a girl about three months ago now. Straight away everything felt so natural and easy. She was bubbly, affectionate, fun and interesting. She has a little daughter and who still sees her father regularly, which I think is great. She suffers from a few medical problems, which make her tired and give her joint pain etc. Over the last couple of weeks things have changed a bit though. She went on holiday with her family. I couldn't really go initially and she was texting me saying she wished I could be there etc. I am easily swayed and booked up a flight to spend the last few days with them. The first two days were great! loved all of her family and they were very nice and generous to me. Her little girl started calling me daddy, which is a new thing. I quickly corrected her though, to which she replied "no, just pretend". My girlfriend seemed really uncomfortable with it, but I felt like I dealt with it well. I know that she is concerned about her daughter getting attached to someone new who may not stick around, but I am not going to ignore her. However, I know my place. The third night we were all around the table playing card games. I was teasing my girlfriend about something trivial and everyone laughed. She wasn't happy about this later on when we were on our own. I tried to explain it was only a bit of fun. I apologised a couple of times for upsetting her, but she wasn't really having any of it. The next day was ok, but later on she seemed to be more distant and then it generally went down hill from there. She was huffing and puffing about everything like a teenager and generally talking to me like I was an idiot. She wafted away affectionate touches, saying I was fussing or faffing. When I backed off for a while though she would then approach me for affection. I asked her what the problem was, to which she replied "what do you mean? I don't understand what your problem is". I am left very confused by her actions. I hadn't seen her for 5 days prior to flying out. I don't fuss over her all the time. I don't ask her what she is doing all the time and she has a very active social life. We often go for 3 or 4 days without seeing each other and sometimes 8 due to our work. So when I see her I want to be close, but she makes it feel like we have been together for years and that my presence is just irritating at times. We have had arguments, where after a cool down I have later gone to talk it through. She seems to not want to do this at all and say "It's done now, why are you going around in circles?" These may seem like trivial things, but it is quite hard to explain every little detail. Perhaps we just aren't compatible, but I think we are. I think it's getting more serious and she is getting a bit scared and testing me. All I know is I am left sitting here this morning feeling pretty crap and wondering what to do.
Greznog Posted August 27, 2012 Posted August 27, 2012 You are too nice and friendly, that just doesn't turn women on.
Author donmo Posted August 27, 2012 Author Posted August 27, 2012 Yes perhaps you are right. I did get angry, but I didn't want to cause a scene in front of everyone so I didn't really let her have it. In the past I have been angry and stubborn with girlfriends and that just ends up being destructive too. I can't be something I'm not though.
Greznog Posted August 27, 2012 Posted August 27, 2012 Oh it's not just that. Firstly you shouldn't date single mothers, you should have sex with single mother but you should never date one. If you do you most definitely don't meet their brood in the first, say, year. Your willingness to go to this family gathering type of thing 3 months into the relationship combined with her daughter apparently liking you signifies weakness in the female psyche.
Radu Posted August 27, 2012 Posted August 27, 2012 It all started going downhill when she called you daddy. You guys have been dating for just 3 months. How old is she, she may have felt in competition with her daughter.
Author donmo Posted August 27, 2012 Author Posted August 27, 2012 It is unusual. I haven't ever met a family so soon before. Perhaps a mistake like you say. Why do you think that shows as weakness though? I wouldn't have chosen to meet her daughter so soon. It was her decision to bring her along one day to something. I hardly felt like I could refuse to go after being told that information. Her daughter is three Radu. I suspect you might be right there, but there was nothing I could do about that unfortunately.
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