rach24680 Posted August 20, 2012 Posted August 20, 2012 Boyfriend of 4 years broke up with me (by txt). We weren't happy for a while anyway... At first I was really angry, at him for txtin the break up, at myself for letting him treat me bad, and at the fact I shouldn't have stayed in the relationship for the past 1 to 2 years because I wasn't happy. Today, I feel down, a bit lost and quite lonely. I haven't cried, I'm not really a crying person, but I feel like I should or else I won't move on or something? I'm still eating/sleeping/working/laughing, but everything just feels mellow and grey. I thought he might have txtd me by now, we broke up once before and he txtd me just to ask if i was oky. I don't want him to txt me so I can get back with him, hell no I would never go back there, I just want to have the upper hand I suppose, so I can ignore him and he can be the one to feel upset. I don't want him to be out having a good time, I want him to be feeling lonely and checking his phone wondering if i've txt him. It's my birthday thursday and I've got a long weekend booked off and filled it with plans, but I'll be really upset if he doesn't wish me happy birthday. I dno, I'm just feeling pretty crap right now
Car10e Posted August 20, 2012 Posted August 20, 2012 Boyfriend of 4 years broke up with me (by txt). We weren't happy for a while anyway... At first I was really angry, at him for txtin the break up, at myself for letting him treat me bad, and at the fact I shouldn't have stayed in the relationship for the past 1 to 2 years because I wasn't happy. Today, I feel down, a bit lost and quite lonely. I haven't cried, I'm not really a crying person, but I feel like I should or else I won't move on or something? I'm still eating/sleeping/working/laughing, but everything just feels mellow and grey. I thought he might have txtd me by now, we broke up once before and he txtd me just to ask if i was oky. I don't want him to txt me so I can get back with him, hell no I would never go back there, I just want to have the upper hand I suppose, so I can ignore him and he can be the one to feel upset. I don't want him to be out having a good time, I want him to be feeling lonely and checking his phone wondering if i've txt him. It's my birthday thursday and I've got a long weekend booked off and filled it with plans, but I'll be really upset if he doesn't wish me happy birthday. I dno, I'm just feeling pretty crap right now You want him to text you just so you can ignore him? Not to be mean, but that sounds pretty selfish
Author rach24680 Posted August 20, 2012 Author Posted August 20, 2012 You want him to text you just so you can ignore him? Not to be mean, but that sounds pretty selfish maybe it's selfish, i'm only being honest and venting, but i'ts just an idea to a way i think i might cope. If anyone has some actual advice and doesn't want to make me feel any worse than I do, then please be my guest to write.
lovejoy41 Posted August 20, 2012 Posted August 20, 2012 (edited) Hi Rach, I understand how you feel. Yes, you need to cry it out. Get it out of your system so that you can't start to heal. I get what you're saying about him texting you but don't think that way. I thought that hearing from my ex would make me feel better. Mostly because it would make me feel as if he really cares & put the ball back in my court(sadly). Well, it didn't. I ignored him when he text me 1 week after I'd walked. The text wasn't anything more than a simple "what's up?". Nowhere near the apology that I was expecting or even an indication that he cares. It was more like him "testing the waters" to see if we were still good since I'd made my gruesome discovery of his live-in gf & her meeting his parents. It actually made me feel worse because I had to fight the urge to reply back to him. I was in tears. He had treated me really bad & I'd just walked away with no intent to go back. I was in strict NC with him. Deep down inside I knew that if I replied that this cycle of him treating me as his "fallback girl" would never end. I got through it though, only to deal with wondering if he'll try again. I'm finally getting to the place where it doesn't matter anymore if he doesn't. I'm actually hoping that he doesn't because I know that it'll stall my progress of healing even if I don't answer him back. If he does, maybe I'll be way over him but who knows. Be careful what you wish for. Just go on with your life as you have and focus on you. I personally think that you're doing really well considering that you're eating and not losing sleep. I didn't do too well with that at first. But anyway hang in there. It will get better. Edited August 20, 2012 by lovejoy41 1
DarlingWallflower Posted August 21, 2012 Posted August 21, 2012 I think the best thing you can do is try to let of your anger towards him because he still has a hold of you. You don't want to be with him so let him go. He was a jerk and could not value you. It's great that you realize that you don't want to go back to him. I do understand that you want him to feel crappy. However, when he realizes what he lost he will feel horrible. Go on and have fun with your life. Remember that it's okay to feel sad because even though he sucked, you still are at a loss. Life goes on and I hope you have a happy birthday. P.S. Don't expect him to text. He sucks anyway! 1
Car10e Posted August 21, 2012 Posted August 21, 2012 maybe it's selfish, i'm only being honest and venting, but i'ts just an idea to a way i think i might cope. If anyone has some actual advice and doesn't want to make me feel any worse than I do, then please be my guest to write. I wasn't trying to make you feel any worse, I really wasn't. I'm sorry if you took it that way. I know how it feels to be bashed on here, and its not a good feeling at all. My advice to you is just move on since you don't want to be with him anyway. Improve yourself, instead of worrying about if he is thinking of you. Breaking up through text is such a cowardly way to go about it. I would be angry as well if that happened to me. I know it sounds immature, but make him jealous with the improvements you make to yourself. That is the ultimate revenge. 1
Author rach24680 Posted August 21, 2012 Author Posted August 21, 2012 P.S. Don't expect him to text. He sucks anyway! haha i love this!! made me laugh! Thanks, i'll remember that! =)
Author rach24680 Posted August 21, 2012 Author Posted August 21, 2012 . I would be angry as well if that happened to me. I know it sounds immature, but make him jealous with the improvements you make to yourself. That is the ultimate revenge. no hard feelings =). yea i'm already doing this, wouldn't want any other guys to see my wobbly bits, better get myself back in shape!! I now see what people end up bashing the gym after break ups!
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