stemac Posted August 14, 2012 Posted August 14, 2012 Hello all I am New to this Forum just need to pour my heart I've been with my girlfriend for a year and a Half.... so last Wensday we fall out over me staying over at hers at the weekend i said i would think about it come Thursday morning i text her good morning i get a text back saying i dont feel Happy about our relationship at the moment,your answer to "think about it" speaks volumes! i really cant understand why she would say that i didn't think it was a big deal plus after texting good morning to her i was text again at what time she would be picking me up and i would be staying that night anyway we didn't speak for a day or so then Saturdayi asked if she was coming down and stay the night then goto my Friends on Sunday for Sunday lunch i got a text back saying No, im calling it a day.. i Rang her last night couldn't take it no longer... she starts telling me why she calling it a day 1 was when she stays over when she goes to bed i might stay up watching a film but i always asked her if its ok with her she did say once it bothered her but i didn't think it was a big Deal but i would have sorted it if she asked again :0( and the other was going to my local we only been a few times and not going anywhere she wants a few pub near me are abit rough so i said we are not going in them... so she Broken my heart for theses reasons we have only just come back off Holiday from Spain 2 weeks ago we had a lovely time... so i cant get my head around her destroying are Relationship when i love her more then anything in this World i got very upset talking to her last night "tears" so i stopped the Call hour later she text saying hope ur ok x ive not spoken or text since.... i Feel so so bad not eaten ive been in tears alot today i miss her and don't think i deserve this im not bad person I thought i made her Happy from a very heart Broken lad
youngnlove89 Posted August 14, 2012 Posted August 14, 2012 Hello all I am New to this Forum just need to pour my heart I've been with my girlfriend for a year and a Half.... so last Wensday we fall out over me staying over at hers at the weekend i said i would think about it come Thursday morning i text her good morning i get a text back saying i dont feel Happy about our relationship at the moment,your answer to "think about it" speaks volumes! i really cant understand why she would say that i didn't think it was a big deal plus after texting good morning to her i was text again at what time she would be picking me up and i would be staying that night anyway we didn't speak for a day or so then Saturdayi asked if she was coming down and stay the night then goto my Friends on Sunday for Sunday lunch i got a text back saying No, im calling it a day.. i Rang her last night couldn't take it no longer... she starts telling me why she calling it a day 1 was when she stays over when she goes to bed i might stay up watching a film but i always asked her if its ok with her she did say once it bothered her but i didn't think it was a big Deal but i would have sorted it if she asked again :0( and the other was going to my local we only been a few times and not going anywhere she wants a few pub near me are abit rough so i said we are not going in them... so she Broken my heart for theses reasons we have only just come back off Holiday from Spain 2 weeks ago we had a lovely time... so i cant get my head around her destroying are Relationship when i love her more then anything in this World i got very upset talking to her last night "tears" so i stopped the Call hour later she text saying hope ur ok x ive not spoken or text since.... i Feel so so bad not eaten ive been in tears alot today i miss her and don't think i deserve this im not bad person I thought i made her Happy from a very heart Broken lad I'm trying REALLY REALLY hard to understand what you have wrote here for us to read. My mind goes a little crazy when I can't understand where a sentence has begun and ended. How old are you?
Author stemac Posted August 14, 2012 Author Posted August 14, 2012 I'm not trying to be mean, if that helps. Yeah sorry my head all over the place i am 42 i will try but it right :-)
Author stemac Posted August 14, 2012 Author Posted August 14, 2012 Hello all I am New to this Forum just need to pour my heart I've been with my girlfriend for a year and a Half.... so last Wensday we fall out over me staying over at hers at the weekend. I said i would think about it come Thursday morning i text her good morning. I get a text back saying i dont feel Happy about our relationship at the moment.Your answer to "think about it" speaks volumes!.. i really cant understand why she would say that i didn't think it was a big deal plus after texting good morning to her. I was text again at what time she would be picking me up that day and i would be staying that night. Anyway we didn't speak for a day or so then Saturday I asked if she was coming down and stay the night then We go my Friends on Sunday for Sunday lunch. I got a text back saying No, im calling it a day.. I Rang her last night I couldn't take it no longer... she starts telling me why she is calling it a day. First reason was when she stays over at the weekend when she goes to bed. I might stay up watching a film but i always asked her if its ok with her. She did say once it bothered her but i didn't think it was a big Deal but i would have sorted it if she asked again :0( And the other reason was we go to my local Pub we have only been a few times to this pub and she complained we are not going anywhere she wants.. A few pubs near me are abit rough so i said we are not going in them only thinking about her. So she Broken my heart for theses reasons. We have only just come back off Holiday from Spain 2 weeks ago we had a lovely time... so i cant get my head around her destroying are Relationship when i love her more then anything in this World. i got very upset talking to her last night "tears" So i stopped the Call 1 hour later she text saying hope ur ok x ive not spoken or text since.... i Feel so so bad not eaten ive been in tears alot today i miss her and don't think i deserve this im not bad person I thought i made her Happy from a very heart Broken lad
Author stemac Posted August 14, 2012 Author Posted August 14, 2012 it wouldn't let me re-edit it so re-posted it
William. Posted August 15, 2012 Posted August 15, 2012 **** i'm feeling the same thing as well, it's little problems and women just throw down the towel without a thought
Author stemac Posted August 15, 2012 Author Posted August 15, 2012 **** i'm feeling the same thing as well, it's little problems and women just throw down the towel without a thought so true William...i really don't understand how someone could End a relationship on a few meaningless problems that can be sorted with a few words. some people are just not happy with what they have always thinking the grass is always greener.. 1
youngnlove89 Posted August 15, 2012 Posted August 15, 2012 Hello all I am New to this Forum just need to pour my heart I've been with my girlfriend for a year and a Half.... so last Wensday we fall out over me staying over at hers at the weekend. I said i would think about it come Thursday morning i text her good morning. I get a text back saying i dont feel Happy about our relationship at the moment.Your answer to "think about it" speaks volumes!.. i really cant understand why she would say that i didn't think it was a big deal plus after texting good morning to her. I was text again at what time she would be picking me up that day and i would be staying that night. Anyway we didn't speak for a day or so then Saturday I asked if she was coming down and stay the night then We go my Friends on Sunday for Sunday lunch. I got a text back saying No, im calling it a day.. I Rang her last night I couldn't take it no longer... she starts telling me why she is calling it a day. First reason was when she stays over at the weekend when she goes to bed. I might stay up watching a film but i always asked her if its ok with her. She did say once it bothered her but i didn't think it was a big Deal but i would have sorted it if she asked again :0( And the other reason was we go to my local Pub we have only been a few times to this pub and she complained we are not going anywhere she wants.. A few pubs near me are abit rough so i said we are not going in them only thinking about her. So she Broken my heart for theses reasons. We have only just come back off Holiday from Spain 2 weeks ago we had a lovely time... so i cant get my head around her destroying are Relationship when i love her more then anything in this World. i got very upset talking to her last night "tears" So i stopped the Call 1 hour later she text saying hope ur ok x ive not spoken or text since.... i Feel so so bad not eaten ive been in tears alot today i miss her and don't think i deserve this im not bad person I thought i made her Happy from a very heart Broken lad Okay, so basically she has given up on you. You have to accept that. Love doesn't walk away, people do. Right now, you need to keep no contact. Let her go. That ball is in her court. Be strong. I am in the same position as you. No contact is the only way. She will either realize you are worth it or you will realize she isn't.
Frank13 Posted August 15, 2012 Posted August 15, 2012 **** i'm feeling the same thing as well, it's little problems and women just throw down the towel without a thought Actually it usually builds up and they emotionally check out of the relationship long before they actually end it. The little problems are just the extra push to end it. 1
Author stemac Posted August 15, 2012 Author Posted August 15, 2012 Okay, so basically she has given up on you. You have to accept that. Love doesn't walk away, people do. Right now, you need to keep no contact. Let her go. That ball is in her court. Be strong. I am in the same position as you. No contact is the only way. She will either realize you are worth it or you will realize she isn't. yep she has kills me to say it! yeah i am doing NC she did this once before not long after getting together, I did NC she texted me few days later saying sorry ive made a bad mistake. not going through this again
youngnlove89 Posted August 15, 2012 Posted August 15, 2012 yep she has kills me to say it! yeah i am doing NC she did this once before not long after getting together, I did NC she texted me few days later saying sorry ive made a bad mistake. not going through this again But it's something you heart has to know, that she doesn't want you. Same thing happened to me. It's an up and down battle. IT's a vicious cycle that will never stop. Come and go. Repeat. It stops when YOU make the decision for it to stop!
Anastar Posted August 16, 2012 Posted August 16, 2012 Hey, I'm sorry for your BU...I'm 7 weeks into mine, and its gut wrenching. I also lost my job a few days before the BU, so having all this time on my hands only made it worse. You're gf sounds like she has some commitment issues. You said that you just recently spent two weeks on holiday together and that she's done this before. Also she complained about sleeping over your place. I see a kind of pattern here. When she feels she is getting to close she retrieves. You run after her. As bad as you are feeling right now and you want to make it work, you may try the opposite approach. Let her be, and let yourself be. When someone is trying to get away from you the last thing you want to do is chase after them. She knows you love her and I'm sure she loves you too. But if you keep chasing her, she may not realize this. Accept your feelings by feelng them, they will hurt, but they wont kill you. Give yourself a time period of NC...and stick to it. Even if its one day. Then the next day, try again...NC just for today. Keep telling yourself that every morning you wake up, or if you're not really sleeping, then tell yourself that for the next 24 hours you will practice passive observance, i.e. NC. Do it for 22 days...one day at a time. Then on day 23 if you feel you must contact her...then do it..but keep it upbeat and brief. Don't ask her for anything, leave the asking to her. Good Luck!
weallfalldown Posted August 16, 2012 Posted August 16, 2012 You need to go see her, just turn up and friggin demand why? why the **** she's just ended it for no reason. Unless your not telling us the truth?.....did you do anything?......if not get some straight answers ouuta the bitch..... You invested time in her, precious time..........Just turn up and find out!!!!!
Author stemac Posted August 16, 2012 Author Posted August 16, 2012 no ive done nothing wrong why would i i loved her very much ive not contacted her for 3 days now. this is the 3rd day and i am taking this badly not eating and very depressed. i wouldn't go round would make this worse for myself and it would upset me very much :-( some people can just end relationship in the blink of an eye, what hurts the most only 2 and half weeks ago we were happy on holiday in Spain and now this... thank you anaster for your Reply i don't think i will contact her again but i have a problem i got her a sim card on my vodafone account contract, i rang its going to cost me £114 to cancel it plus ive got her phone bill coming at the end of this month that she used on holiday, you try and help and this is how your re-paid :-(
Anastar Posted August 16, 2012 Posted August 16, 2012 Stemac, It sucks about the bills, but its only money. You'll make more! For now lay low, don't use money as an excuse to contact her, not only will she be pissed, she'll think you're cheap. Take the high road, and absorb the losses. Practice self discipline with the NC, and keep telling yourself just for today I wont contact her. After some time passes, and you're back to your normal self, you will be in a much better position to decide what to do or not to do. She may even be shocked that you've left her alone, and depending if she gets into a rebound or not, she may call you before you call her. Stay strong and stay positive. People are flawed, she can't help who she is anymore than you can help who you are. Thinking this way may help keep your anger at bay, and avoid self blame. And once some time passes, you will be able to answer a lot of questions you may have now. For the time being take time to be sad, accept your sadness and all your other feelings, and really feel them.after all this passes you'll come out better. Here's something for you to ponder while youre healing. Hoplesness is good. Because hope tortures a person soul, with a lot of maybes and fantasies about the future. Once hopelessness occurs you will know that you've reached the bottom and thats when you will switch directions, because the only way out is up. Best, A
Author stemac Posted August 16, 2012 Author Posted August 16, 2012 Stemac, It sucks about the bills, but its only money. You'll make more! For now lay low, don't use money as an excuse to contact her, not only will she be pissed, she'll think you're cheap. Take the high road, and absorb the losses. Practice self discipline with the NC, and keep telling yourself just for today I wont contact her. After some time passes, and you're back to your normal self, you will be in a much better position to decide what to do or not to do. She may even be shocked that you've left her alone, and depending if she gets into a rebound or not, she may call you before you call her. Stay strong and stay positive. People are flawed, she can't help who she is anymore than you can help who you are. Thinking this way may help keep your anger at bay, and avoid self blame. And once some time passes, you will be able to answer a lot of questions you may have now. For the time being take time to be sad, accept your sadness and all your other feelings, and really feel them.after all this passes you'll come out better. Here's something for you to ponder while youre healing. Hoplesness is good. Because hope tortures a person soul, with a lot of maybes and fantasies about the future. Once hopelessness occurs you will know that you've reached the bottom and thats when you will switch directions, because the only way out is up. Best, A Thank you very much Anastar for your words... i am trying :-) and its helps from people like you :-)
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